1. Welcome to NoFap! We have disabled new forum accounts from being registered for the time being. In the meantime, you can join our weekly accountability groups.
    Dismiss Notice

Asked About Porn on the First Date

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by Deleted Account, Jul 16, 2017.

  1. It didn't happen to me but I was listening to a podcast where a woman said she asks about porn on a first date. She said asking about the porn habits of her date reveals what kind of person he is.

    Here's the link to the podcast if you're interested:
    http://www.wnyc.org/story/porn-death-sex-money/

    I found to be a good listen. They talk to arrange of people about their relationship with porn. It has people who think that there's nothing with porn to those who are addicted to it. There's also one story of a guy who got blackmailed by a pornographer and then there's the women who I mentioned at the beginning of this thread.

    But how would you answer if you were asked on a first date if you look at porn?
    Would you ask your date if they look at porn?
    Does a persons answer reveal what kind of person they are?
     
  2. Olly91

    Olly91 Fapstronaut

    18
    25
    13
    I'm pretty sure my girlfriend may have mentioned the question on our first date. Only in passing, and I kind of played it down as no I don't watch it. Only recently have I realised this was pretty much a lie. Okay, I was never addicted to video pornography, but I've since realised I had an addiction to still images that aligned with my fantasies. I was hooked on tumblr. This realisation only became prevalent when I starting dating my girlfriend, and now I'm trying to kick the habit for her and to improve myself. 17 days in I think. I guess what you class as porn is part of your question. You and your date may have differing opinions. Looking at girls on Facebook could be classed as P if you can't help but fap over it.
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  3. If I remember correctly the woman on the podcast admitted to looking at porn but stopped because she found it boring but liked masturbating. So from her end it wasn't about judging the guy. She seemed to think it was funny in how her dates reacted to her question.

    If I was asked I would be honest and admit to using it. But I plan to date after I've rebooted so my porn viewing will be in my past then.
     
  4. If a girl would ask me about watching porn, I'll just say something like 'Yeah, but only the kinkiest one, cause why go for something softcore when you can go full-on from the begining' with a grin on my face or just after saying that I'll burst out with laugter. It's fun way to introduce sexuality to conversation, it's blunt, nobody is expecting that and this is making it funny.
     
    Mike Bonanno likes this.
  5. Good question! If I had a guy mentioning porn or asking me directly about porn during a date but especially on a first date, I would immediately shut down and run away inventing an excuse of "I gotta go coz...something invented in the moment" lol or stay but waiting for the end of the date. I wouldn't want to have nothing to do with that person anymore:emoji_grimacing: (I had a guy who mentioned his favourite book was titled "Porno" I was shocked while he thought it was a normal convo to have...like do you think is it appropiate mentioning this so I can imagine you masturbating while watching porn, already know you are a pervert who just wants to get laid. no, thanks

    I think it is nasty to talk about porn above all when on a date you are supposed to impress positively the other person. I wouldn't reply, I would just pretend i wasn't a porn addict, having no precise idea of it like i would about a unicorn :emoji_unicorn: (being a girl I can mask it easier). Obviously it is a lie but believable. Seeing from the outside nobody could tell i used to be a porn addict, that i could write a book about this stuff for how much i was into this matter for years. Plus who talks openly about porn in public? lol:emoji_flushed::emoji_dizzy_face: I am a private person a i don't like to share my inner self often. only few knew all of me

    I would never ask a guy while on a date if they look at porn. Probably never
    I disagree that you get to see what kind of person you have in front of you, by asking about porn. Absolutely not. I believe you get the person from tons of other questions (life goals, easy-going/shy, with or without sense of humour, believing in relgion or not and if yes what religion, ambitious or not, etc.):emoji_blush:
     
  6. Drew140

    Drew140 Guest

    Women watch porn too.
     
  7. JohnnyReid

    JohnnyReid Fapstronaut

    9
    15
    3
    My current SO and I met online. I had something about NoFap written on my profile since it's such a big part of my life now, and her first message to me was along the lines of asking me what it was. I was completely honest with her straight up, with the disclaimer 'get ready for a can of worms..'

    If she asks you about about porn (and inadvertently, whether it's a problem), see it as a blessing and an opportunity. However, remember to do this thing for yourself!
     
    Last edited: Jul 25, 2017
  8. Kenzi

    Kenzi Fapstronaut

    I totally asked like 3 dates in?
    And he lied.
    I usually ask.
    What?
    Women watch it too.
    Again, I have No problem with porn

    It's the lying thats the deal breaker.
     
    GG2002 likes this.
  9. faplordxd

    faplordxd Fapstronaut

    65
    36
    18
    Just say i used to but i havent in 95 days or whatever your streak is

    Most guys look at porn so she wont give a fuck
     
  10. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

    2,007
    3,391
    143
    ??? Explain what technical addiction is.
     
  11. Spiff

    Spiff Fapstronaut

    407
    779
    93
    @GG2002 could be wrong, but I think he doesn't consider that naked girls is porn... only videos of people having sex.

    If this is the case... I can reset my porn counter to like 3000 days. I never liked watching a dude screw a girl.

    I think most people would agree that naked girls is porn. I consider even underwear pics porn, personally.
     
    Last edited: Jul 30, 2017
  12. I assumed sexy girls meant women in bikinis.
     
  13. LKT

    LKT Fapstronaut

    51
    24
    8
    so in other words, you don't care about the answer, only whether and how easily your date is willing to lie to you?
     
  14. Spiff

    Spiff Fapstronaut

    407
    779
    93
    After reading what I've read on this forum, If I was a woman, I would ask about porn ASAP. I would make it clear that I wouldn't tolerate it in any sort of relationship.

    If that made the guy leave, I certainly wouldn't shed any tears. If a guy won't quit porn for a girl, she's better off not getting involved until the guy's over the addiction. We porn addicts are trouble.
     
  15. Kenzi

    Kenzi Fapstronaut

    Just look at the answers on this thread.
    At least I ask
    No wonder so many women are shocked.. At least I'm not walking around with blinders on.
    He said he watched it.
    That wasn't the lie.
    It was to what extent.
    Which would try to destroy us later.
    When a man says he does not touch porn or scoffs it off, usually he's full of shit.
    Why even start a relationship with a liar?
    There's no foundation.
     
    Queen_Of_Hearts_13 likes this.
  16. Messialdo

    Messialdo Fapstronaut

    22
    20
    3
    I'd answer "who doesn't?".

    It's 2017, I think most people in the world watch porn. It's the addiction part and how many times you watch it that you don't the girl to know on the first date lol.

    Wouldn't the girl rather hear you've been masturbating to porn than fucking plenty of other woman?
     
  17. Gotham Outlaw

    Gotham Outlaw Fapstronaut

    579
    3,902
    123
    My reaction to the question would be very different depending on where we were. If we were somewhere private I would explain to her that I'm a part of nofap. If we were in a restaurant or a store I'd say it's not an appropriate conversation.
     
  18. Saskia Simone

    Saskia Simone Fapstronaut

    2,128
    9,713
    143
    I am a woman who would never ask this of a man on the first date. The reason being, on the first date, you owe each other nothing but kindness and courtesy. It should be a time for teasing, flirtation, dance, mystery. No oversharing, no expectations. Just finding out if you are entry-level compatible.
     
  19. Buzz Lightyear

    Buzz Lightyear Fapstronaut

    2,690
    2,878
    143
    The problem here is you expect people to be shameless. But a sense of shame is actually the most powerful and natural force to make us want to be a better person. God help us the day we live in a shameless society and confess all our warts and all to all and sundry.
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  20. Buzz Lightyear

    Buzz Lightyear Fapstronaut

    2,690
    2,878
    143
    No, she would want to hear you have some standards, and are dating a few women whilst looking for someone... special.:rolleyes:

    But of course it depends on the woman, and what the man is looking for... the whole hook-up scene is really just the pornification of our culture... the addiction to sex.
     
    Cloud_Strife_09 likes this.

Share This Page