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Trying to start NoFap again!

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Spikey Cloud, Aug 28, 2017.

  1. Steve1453

    Steve1453 Fapstronaut

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    Believe it or not, Spike, but I'd never heard of 3-FA until you told me about it. The only amph I've ever had is amphetamine sulphate (I used to take about 2 grams at a time). It's just as well that it's almost impossible to get now, because if it was easy to get I'd be on the dark web looking for it. Wow ! that hard as steel erection sounds wonderful. I'd be as noisy as fuck with it too ! lol I wonder if clits get that hard too.

    BTW Trump and Kim are two bald men fighting over a comb, as the Argentinian writer, Borges, said about the Falklands War !
     
  2. Steve1453

    Steve1453 Fapstronaut

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    I think it's very sad that you get no feelings with your erections now
    I hope your feelings come back when you're hard, I really do....
     
  3. Spikey Cloud

    Spikey Cloud Fapstronaut

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    I do feel it a bit I know when I got an erection of course but it is not a very distinct feeling.
     
  4. Steve1453

    Steve1453 Fapstronaut

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    If you leave this site, Spike, would you please give me your email address ? I'd miss you like hell, even after this short time. We still wouldn't know each other's locations (I have no idea whether you live in the USA, Scandinavia, Russia, or wherever, and you must have noticed that I haven't asked), but we could still keep in touch. I'll give you mine first, if you want it. The only reason why I've mentioned this is because you said earlier that you'd give up Nofap in a couple of weeks if you felt it was a waste of time. I feel such an affinity with you that I'd really miss you if we were never in contact again. I love what you say, and I want to read more of it.
     
  5. Steve1453

    Steve1453 Fapstronaut

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    Spike .... will we get kicked out of here if the moderators read our chats about how amph made us us so fucky hornty ?
     
  6. Steve1453

    Steve1453 Fapstronaut

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    Spike ... will we get kicked out of hear if the moderators read out chats about amph, and think we're out of order about it ? After all, I've talked really dirty with you about how it makes me feel. I dont give a damn about what others think about it, but I don't want to be ejected ftom here.
     
  7. Steve1453

    Steve1453 Fapstronaut

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  8. Spikey Cloud

    Spikey Cloud Fapstronaut

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    I don't know - if it is not allowed they could say that of course.


    I have some bad news too :(


    Yesterday when I do go out I took some GHB – and the experience was not very good. It is pretty hard to explain but when I was in the club I totally lost myself – I mean littarly I was not a person anymore. I found that extremely disturbing. It was that almost every three seconds my personality changed. I was real anymore and had not control over myself. I felt very anti-social and not matter how much I tried to relativate that these thoughts are bullshit – it just did not work. I also thought a lot of negative and often I didn’t even want to look my friends in the eyes. Oh yeah my friends did not seem real also in a way just patterns or something…it is hard to explain. The good thing that woman looked a lot better but I could not care anymore.

    This is a pattern that I have sober from some time now too. But tonight it was extremely enhanced. I really need to work on that. And I’m not going to take GHB for a while for sure.

    Then when I was home I decided to check if my feeling was increased and it wasn’t because of that I decided to come that happened in seconds and the orgasm was extremely weak. I don’t know if I even had one. And I have this for some time now and I was hoping nofap was making it better. If any it made it even worse. So I’m going to quit NoFap and I’m going to try the fleshlight stamina training route. Man I’m really afraid that I cannot enjoy sex again.

    I know I sound a bit like a victim but I find this so unfair. Did you also have these problems after those amps? The last time is 2-3 months ago and I did not take much then and the times before that were also a couple of months between. Also how I'm going to accept that I'm not a person...sigh I guess I need to find that out myself. I have not forgotten the pleasurable experiences though - but those can only be obtained with amphs and I don't want to take those anymore obviously.
     
  9. Steve1453

    Steve1453 Fapstronaut

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    I'm sorry to hear about all this, Spikey. Fucking hell man, you shouldn't be taking that fucking awful stuff at all, let alone while you're trying to cope with the problems you've got. It sounds to me like all your anxiety and suffering were enhanced by the GHB, and that it put you into a sort of panic-state. Did your friends notice that you were anxious and unhappy ? It's not surprising that you were having negative thoughts (how negative were they ?), because you're going through a really serious crisis at the moment, Spike. I wish I could help you, I really do.

    No, I didn't have any problems with wanking and cumming when I stopped the amph, it was just that the wonderful super-enhanced horniness wasn't there any more. The post-amph wanking was pretty dull really.

    What do you mean when you say you're not a person ? I don't understand you. Can you explain it for me, mate.
     
  10. Spikey Cloud

    Spikey Cloud Fapstronaut

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    Sorry missed ur post about the e-mail. I guess we can e-mail I'll pm u my e-mail later this day. I'm from the Netherlands btw.

    I don't think they saw I'm anxious, but I'm kind of the unspoken leader of the group so I don't really like if they see something like that. But I think I should not try to hide that I'm anxious in general. But that is not easy. Esp when there are woman around.

    And yes I'm really going to a crisis - I don't like seeing myself this way. I was once a happy positive person nothing could get me mad and I was passionate about a lot of things.

    The no person thing is hard to explain. I had a very fast changes of perceptions (ego roles) sometimes every second it was extremely annoying but beyond that it felt there was nothing. The people and such of course were there. But I seemed to be nothing kinda only the experience(stillness) – like Eckhart Tolle talks about but I did not find peaceful at all. You can think of it, but when you experience it – it is a whole different ball game. Almost the opposite of the pleasurable experiences I told you about in the past.
     
  11. joarev85

    joarev85 Fapstronaut

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    Sorry to hear that you are going through a hell, Spikey. I am also feeling a low at the moment becuase of some studies I have to re-doing. I hope that you are getting better. Hope that you will stop taking the drugs. I wish you the best luck.
     
  12. Steve1453

    Steve1453 Fapstronaut

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    I know it would be a difficult thing to do, but for your peace of mind you should see a doctor about your terrible cock problems. You'd have to tell him/her about the amph, the usb cables, nofap, and the fleshlight, but what have you got to lose. Yes, it would be embarrassing, but wouldn't it be absolutely fucking marvellous if you could get some real help !!

    The fact that you've lost your passionate interest in things makes me think that you're depressed. I wonder if depression is one of the causes of your sexual problems, and I also wonder whether an anti-depressant would help you. Some anti-depressants are horrible (as I know from experience), but some of them are very good and have amazing results. The thing to remember is that deciding whether to take one is a VERY serious decision. Tell me to mind my own business if you like, Spike, but I've only mentioned these things because you sound seriously unhappy and in need of some help.

    I wondered if you were somewhere in Europe. Congratulations on your English, Spike. I'd guess that there aren't many people in England who can write Dutch as well as you can write English.
     
  13. Spikey Cloud

    Spikey Cloud Fapstronaut

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    I'm already seeing a professional and in a couple of month I probably go to a psychotherapist. I already told them about those fapping session with amphs, nofap and such. The only thing I did not tell is the cables and I don’t find it necessary to go in such detail to be honest.

    And yeah I’m a bit depressed for use, but I don’t want to take medications. I also suspect that I might have ADD, because my attention is all over the place and can’t focus for longer than a few seconds most of the time.

    And yeah it sucks the sex problems but I can even accept those right now. But I won’t accept as easily if those won’t get better. I will send you my e-mail tonight then we can talk further from there.
     
  14. Hi mate. Using a fleshlight is not generally recommended. The reason being that it is still fake. It is artificial, so should be avoided. For sensitivity and rewiring, abstain from porn and masturbation (with hands or a fleshlight). All the best Spikey!
     
    joarev85 likes this.
  15. Spikey Cloud

    Spikey Cloud Fapstronaut

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    Thanks but I'll try to do the FL route now. I tried NoFap 4 times now and it did not give my any benefits what so ever. My shaft is still insensitive, me PE is even worse and I still can't barely feel any orgasm. I never watched much porn of fapped a lot to begin with, so I think it doesn't have a big effect on me.

    I heard some good things about sensitivity increase with the FL. It won't hurt to try.
     
  16. Steve1453

    Steve1453 Fapstronaut

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  17. Steve1453

    Steve1453 Fapstronaut

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    Dear Spikey,

    I've sent you some messages today, but it looks like you've changed your email address. Why man ? I just wanted to be a helpful friend for you.

    Steve ..
     
  18. Steve1453

    Steve1453 Fapstronaut

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    If you didn't want me to be a friend and helper, why didn't you just tell me that from the start ? I'm devastated.
     
  19. Spikey Cloud

    Spikey Cloud Fapstronaut

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    Ermmm ur kidding right that is a pretty big assumption...I did not change my e-mail adress - there are some problems on my account I can't seem to get e-mails on that adress almost the whole day.
     
  20. Steve1453

    Steve1453 Fapstronaut

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    Sorry Spike, I've behaved like a complete idiot. I'd had a few drinks and became ridiculously worried and upset because I hadn't heard from you..I wasn't thinking rationally when I sent you those messages. Please forgive me.
     

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