dont know how im ever going to stop...

I actually just started getting serious about nofap last night after my 100th relapse and I gotta say that it's definitely not easy. I'm not exactly the best person to model yourself after, but what I can tell you about abstaining from PMO is that eventually you're going to hit rock bottom and it's definitely better to stop now then it would be to stop when shit hits the fan. Whatever you do my man, don't give in. Keeping a positive outlook, in my opinion, is half the battle. When thoughts of hopelessness start to sink in, try to find it in you to keep fighting back the urges and negative emotions. Good luck

 

hi mate,

well, i felt just like you, iam without PMO for 5 days now... we can do it! i already failed many times too, but now i gotta get this done

 

Be stronger I feel stronger

 

Yeah keep going mate the effects are worth it and you dont want this to effect your chances with a girl you actually care about (as it did for me).

 

You got this! Don't worry everyone messes up! Shit I did today after almost 3 weeks clean! It's gonna be hard but what helps me the most is just coming on here when I feel the urge and reading success stories! We are all in this together

 

The way I approach is to keep focused on the fact that I have already stopped. After all nobody can do it 24/7. Even if you stop when your sleeping or in public you are still stopped, Stopping for me is not about a lifetime decision, just a decision not to start again today, or maybe even in the next hour. A lifetime decision is such an overwhelming committment that most people will fail. Why not do what alcoholics do and refrain just for today. Then the days turn into weeks and the weeks turn into months and so on. A lot of people try to make a lifetime decision but what is a lifetime. For some people, they might die young, for others it might be a long time. Make your decision on a daily or hourly basis and then renew it each day or hour. That way you build confidence and self trust and each day or hour that you didn't fap is success - and success breeds success.

 

I have a friend on nofap called everettsmith . and also, there was a wonderful person called william on nofap. William did a year of no pmo and he is no longer here on nofap. He made complete use of this site, got educated, learned to love withdrawals and succeeded with the right mindset.
He sent a private message to my friend Everett smith once and Smith shared it with me which was very helpful -

"Hi EverettSmith.

Thanks for posting on my "Get Educated" thread. At 56 you will have an easier difficult time quitting than the younger ones, the kids whose first sexual experiences and thoughts were hypersexualized by porn. The science shows that guys who are older, who wired before the existence of High Speed Internet Porn, wired first to--surprise--actual sex, thoughts of sex with real women. Because you were wired to those first at one time it will take you less to rewire to them because men who were wired that way at least once, as opposed to never (meaning only to porn) can rewire more easily, or to be technically correct, with less difficulty.

Again, thanks for writing. As I get farther and farther away from the initial struggle my posts have become less urgent, less about how to quit porn and more about how to live life well. But, be certain Everett, when quitting, when first quitting, you must do it with urgency, with focus, with determination, even with anger. You cannot keep it in your life--at all--and overcome it. There are two types of guys here, the guys who hate what porn has done to them, but want to control it, keep it on leash, keep it in their lives. They are doomed to fail when quitting. The second type of guys--and this is me--are guys who realize porn came to control them, and that the only way to control it is to excommunicate it, defriend it, ban it, expel it, eliminate it totally from your life. Do that 9 months, like I have, and not watching porn becomes the thing you want to do.

Good luck Everett. I hope to see you in here helping others. How do we help ourselves? We help ourselves by helping others, so find people to help.

Good luck on your journey."




You can , and should, read his entire journal. It takes over 1.5 hours to go through the whole thing but for me it was the best 1.5 hours I ever spent on this. He tells you what to expect. To be forewarned is to be forearmed. It literally saved my life, and now perhaps my marriage too


http://www.nofap.org/forum/showthrea...ve-withdrawals

 

You can do it! Nobody said it was going to be easy. Take it day by day, week by week.

 

I'm right there with you man, we'll get through this though

 

You can do this. Yes, it is going to be hard, but we have to rewire our mind. I have been free for 1 day now, but I am already feeling the positive effects. Plus, life is so much better than sitting in front of a computer looking at P all day. I have also found an app on iphone called brain buddy that is excellent. Hang it there.

 

I also joined to today..
I've found myself "rewired" to the point where PMO has become a pre sleep ritual almost...
I'm wanting to stop, this is day 1, hopefully of many to come

 

We can all do this. I am re-starting my journey today as well. Good luck guys!