Why I keep relapsing

You might be a loser, a loser who wants to go ahead in life, a loser who finds each day a way to improve himself, a loser who will give up on bad habits like porn and the best thing, a loser that someday will stop being a loser and become a winner. So it's up to you whether you want to continue this way or not! I know you can do this, otherwise I wouldn't be wasting my time writing this.

 

Hi Oliver, this is not as much about you as you think it is. You are a human being with tremendous ability. You can bring so much out into the world. Being critical of yourself means you know that there is more to achieve. Sure, you're not where you'd like to be just yet. Perhaps you don't know where you'd like to be to begin with.

Right now what you need is to be gentle and kind with yourself. List all the things you can be thankful for in your life, list any success you have had in the past, and hold on to these. Sometimes we feel so much distance between our expectations and reality that we forget how to appreciate the beauty of the present moment. That's just our ego talking. But you are not your ego and you can learn how to silence that critical inner voice.

 

If you aren't familiar with it, I'd suggest looking into Plato's Allegory of the Cave (or at least read the Wikipedia) because it pertains EXACTLY to your OP. Mindfulness mediation is also super helpful during NoFap.

What is known in your life then? PMO is a constant that you can rely on. Something you don't have to think about. Something that's always there; 24-7. What else do you know about it? That its empty, unfulfilling and led you to this site? That no matter how much of it you take in, no matter how much you M, you will never feel satisfied, happy, normal or successful? If the KNOWN in your life is negative then maybe the key to happiness lies in the UNKNOWN.

Was your life full of hope and promise before you started NoFap? What HOPE are you holding onto by resisting change?

What you are feeling is 100% normal for someone going through a serious life change that involves giving up a major coping mechanism. Remember that this is something MOST MEN don't go through, because they are blind to the problem or they don't believe that they can change. Do you believe in yourself?

This TED Talk is one of my favorites and helps me stay aware of the importance of challenging self doubt and our inner critic:



A line that I hear myself repeating internally daily is:

You change your life more by the way you perceive it, if you create a new story and start to believe it, not the victim or monster, be the hero and you'll find, a more useful feeling than the voice in your mind

and Smile; You Can Do It!

 

You should motivate yourself man , to not doing it ,, don't be afraid don't be depressed

If you want to know what fear is , think of WWII
18 and 19 year old teens dropped in war zones they saw there best friends get killed ,that is fear

You are okay just tell yourself everything will be okay