Frustration is my biggest trigger. What is yours?

I think the sensitivity issue is a matter of rewiring, you are used to every time you touch yourself you do more then just peeing. Stay strong and it will get better.

 

It is so crazy how much this is common in my case most of the times it is a escape valve too but I think the only way to solve it is to take the punches and do not give up.

 

I am a hypocrite in that sense too. I feel like my life should be better but when the time to change and make things better come I do nothing and the cycle starts again... It is really hard to jolt your self out it.

 

True. is there anything humans did that is worth to mention that doesnt include discomfort? I do love martial arts for a reason... Porn is a completley perverted game. Why? cause in the very moment it makes you "feel good" it litteraly shows you what you dont have, what you (maybe) will never get. It gives you an orgams by demonstrating to you what a loser you are. Cause the guy on the screen, that should have been you, right?
@borborite: without a little idealism you probably wouldnt be here. So far perfectionism has its good sides. But of course being a perfectionist means to allways stand with one feed allready in the realm of deception. We can imagine everything better. If you take porn: there is no chance to escape that routine into openening another tab and another tab and another... you find a good scene. You could search a better one. So it goes. While the background is that allready the life itself, of the consument, is not at all perfect. And never will be. I think the ability to accept the latter, is one step out of this irrealistic self-degradation (that porn exploits, but actually is everywhere).

 

I feel so ahead of my time by learning this whilest at the same time feeling like I wasted my life so far. I thought that when I finally learned what was wrong with me I would be happy and things would fall into places, but I could not have been more wrong and now is the time that I walk through shit on my hands and knees. Smells bad but it feels good inside.

 

I am seeing a pattern now and it is important not to get traped by the tied, the easy way is to avoid the first bad decision because past that it get exponentially harder. Stay strong.

 

For me it's boredom and stress. But I realized two factors that really helps me.

1. Having someone hold you accountable ( yes judging you ). Without fear of consequence you don't stop.
2. Keeping busy when I get away from dark places and stay busy I'm less likely to do it

 

You just putted on words what I was trying to figure out for four days and it is a luxury to understand that at this point of the journey, with that knowledge laid out this way I think I just got 10 days on noPMO for free. My bad decisions start when I allow myself to stare at someone I like more then 3 seconds without saying anything to them after that it snowballs into frustration and the rest of the misery cycle aka PMO.

 

PMO is such a shameful act but the crazy thing is that we do not think about it when doing it we just assume it is "normal" which is far from. Your tactic is pretty good I am not that big on accountability partners yet but I bet it will grow on me.

 

Don't be prideful I know it's shameful, but trust me. Get someone who cares about you a whole lot. Girlfriend, Wife, Parent.

Tell them this literally is a problem for me and I need the help.

Also understanding where and how in the PMO system you're at. If your struggle is staring then stop edging view it as bad as you'd feel and do if you masturbated.

 

Depends on too what you're allowing to fester in your mind. It's not PMO initially that gets you I don't think anyone says I'm going to go watch it. It's triggers that we ponder over and then say ok I'm going to watch it I've caved

 

when im tired (verge of wanting to sleep), when bored, when depressed and even when happy sometimes. but once i relapse i am overwhelmed with so much negative feelings/thoughts. its just best to remain bored or depressed etc rather then test drive the triggers