I just told the wife and I don't know how to comfort her

I know how you feel, man. Although I definitely had troubles with PMO, what really hurt my wife was that I was being sexually unfaithful to my wife and seeing other women. I know what it's like to know you've caused serious pain and emotional damage to someone you love. It's hard because you want nothing more than to comfort them, but you're not really in a place to provide that.

Be thankful that your wife is a woman of grace and that she's optimistic about the future.

She has a few things to be thankful for, here:

1) she has a husband who was honest enough to share this issue with her. Most guys aren't willing to do that until they're caught and HAVE to fess up. Rigorous honesty is one of the best weapons you can wield in this fight.

2) PMO is something that literally EVERY guy has to wrestle with--LDS, Christian, whatever. So while she might be hurt that you struggle with it, she shouldn't pretend to believe that you're some kind of special pervert. What you're struggling with is RIDICULOUSLY common.

3) It hasn't gone further than porn.

Best of luck to you guys! You can do it.

 

I am with you my friend. Just joined and I decided to commit fully to my girlfriend as I want to improve our tepid at best sex life. Hang on and just learn to forgive yourself, even if she can not. You are doing the right thing right now. And that's what counts. This is not the end of the world, you haven't done anything in my opinion that's unforgivable. It has caused pain for both of you, and I am in the same boat. However, we are human and flawed and most of us try our best. Keep your head up.

 

Similar situationon my end. Handle it now son. Don't let years of damage occur like I have. If she needs a time-out, go hard mode. Then you will both be able to put it behind you. Date her again, and remember the main reason you married her. Share your life together. Not handling it now will have no benefit. Help others on this forum. helping others is a great way to help yourself
Best to you. ...

 

That's a really hard thing to do, especially in an LDS community where this can be a particularly sensitive issue. I really look up to you for getting this out there and I'm sure you both will figure out how to navigate this "bump in the road"

 

While there is a degree of betrayal here, confessing your problem is also a declaration of trust if your wife can see it that way. I have recently shared with my wife and have her full support. I think being totally honest with each other in a marriage is fundamental so well done for taking the plunge. Hope you can work through it. Maybe suggesting your wife has a look at some of the posts here might help her see how common the problem is and how hard we are trying to deal with it. Becoming addicted is not a choice we willingly made!

 

Just a quick reminder - LDS is Christian. It's not Catholic.

As for the subject matter - be grateful for your wife and soak all of her pain into your heart so that you never do what you have done again. You are lucky to have someone to fight for. Many folks in here do it solely for themselves and thus often fail, losing belief in that it has any actual impact over their lives. Now, you had the chance to clearly see the impact porn has over human souls. And it's not just the "jealousy". If she is indeed Christian, she will forgive you, but you have to deserve and respect the chance you've been given.

And beware of ever forgetting this. There might come a day when her soul seems cured, and at precisely that day a thought of watching porn again in secrecy may pass your mind. You have to stay alert.

 

Not according to the Bible.

I don't want to steer us off into a bad direction, but I feel the need to say that. LDS teaches that God was once a man, like we are now, but became the omnipotent, omnipresent being that he is today. It teaches that we, one day, will become just as great as God is now.

These teachings are heresy to orthodox Christian doctrine. LDS cannot possibly be Christian when they have such a sharp difference in teachings about the nature of God himself. Christianity teaches that God is eternal, perfect, and unchanging. LDS does not.

 

While I am a Christian (not of the LDS variety) just want to say in the nicest way please keep religious debate for a private message or the offtopic section. Whether or not LDS faith is "christian" isn't relevant to our struggles and the argument only serves to discourage participants from being totally open. We are here to encourage each other. Let's remember that and use whatever love and grace our faith might give to help a brother on his way.