I want to completely force my self to stop watching porn and do productive stuff and get a girl!

Hi Joell,


In regards to quitting porn and stopping your fap habits- the only thing I can say is don't dwell on your relapse to much and don't allow it to make you think "I've relapsed today may as well masturbate again" or anything along those lines.

Basically start your new day as you new day 1 and start again! We have all relapsed and we are all tempted but you have to hang in their- trust that you have chosen to do this for a reason and that reason is ultimately going to benefit you! Think of your future happiness and not just a moment of gratification here in the present.

As for speeding things up- you need to take it one day at a time and allow your brain to "reboot" it's the only way. Think of it this way- if you had a broken leg and the only way to heal was to stay off it for 90 days- that is what you would do as your future health would be at risk if you didn't- You wouldn't try and go for a jog or play football with a broken leg or try and speed up it's recovery- you need to apply that same logic to quitting porn/masturbation - your "broken leg" is in your mind/brain- it needs time to heal- let it.

 

Dude, first of all, as the previous post also said, DO NOT CONDEMN YOURSELF; don't focus on the negativity or define yourself by your relapse and all your other problems. Basically, your entire post indicates that you are only focusing on all the bad aspects, but your greatest asset is that you WANT TO CHANGE, YOU WANT TO IMPROVE, so focus on what you need to TO DO so that this can happen. Focus on all the positive changes you have to make, and how POSITIVELY this will affect your life. If you look at things this way, instead of how terrible you feel about everything and all your problems, you will discover some vast improvement and ultimately employ everything you say you want for your life.

And another thing, practice patients and simply enjoy each moment - this makes the patience bearable.

All of the best to you, and if you're keen, read the Gospels in the New Testament of the Bible. God Bless you.

 

Don't give up hope. What has helped me recently is gaining more insight into addiction, and to picture where I want to be (and don't want to be) 5 years from now. Don't be hard on yourself, and celebrate small achievements. One week will eventually become two weeks, which will eventually become 30 days, which will eventually become 90 days. Afterward, the compulsion will no longer be there.