A Progressive Challenge-A different kind of challenge- all levels

Thanks man. It has been tough. Urges and triggers. In need of rewiring my brain.

 

Well O.K. my trigger is heavy depression, lying in bed thinking: fuck this life, I want to die... Compared to suicide, PMO is a better alternative.. So there you have it. I do it to be able to get out of my bed and get some simple stuff done like eating food and going to the toilet.

 

Triggers, girls asses and school uniform. Hate that P got me this way

 

A big middle finger to depression. If only that helped!
I want to be stronger than that. But I have no energy. By giving in to PMO and getting that fix of dopamine, I am able to function for a few more days again. But eventually depression will hit again and I'll be in my bed again, with no energy and self-hate taking the energy that remains. I really want to get out of that. I really really want to have a depression free life. But I have no idea how to make it happen... I have been fighting for so long. I have tried so many different things.

It's the low energy level that gets me to give in

 

Hey, thanks for the great topic.!

I am pretty sure that I want to stop PM forever, and I had some succes with abstaining from M in the past, but less so with P. So my goal is something manageable now, let's say 60 days without PM right now.
Good luck to all of you!

 

Back to day 1, checking in

 

The temptation was pretty insane today, but I succeeded day 2. My trigger's are the following

1. Boredom (I don't have any hobbies outside of reading fanfiction/fiction trivia, and I have wasted 4-5 hours doing just that on even some workdays. Consequently, I've included fanfiction/fiction trivia in my list of things to avoid).

2. Sounds weird af, but if my bladder is full, I feel mild sexual pleasure. I'm feeling it right now, and PMO has been a way to truly indulge in sexual pleasure for a single guy like me. I'm pretty sure this was the reason why I got hooked to PMO initially.

 

Have you considered getting tested for depression. Psychotherapy and medications (the most common type of medication usually takes 4-6 weeks of repeated usage for it to work optimally) tend to work for some people, especially those with more severe depressions.

 

Checking in on Day 10!!! Double digits baby! I’m excited to keep going!

Today wasn’t too bad, stayed busy because it was a full day - that definitely helped - the less boredom, the less urges there are! But I can’t stay busy forever.