90 Day Challenge (after failing 20,000 times)

Start date : 30th November 2017, End date : 27th February 2018

No matter what happens, I will complete this challenge.
I have failed not 10,000 times but 20,000 times.
Yes, I have suffered for the last 20 years.
Yes, I am 37+ , single (always was), without job (worked for 2 months in my entire life....not 2 years...2 months).
Yes, partly my body and mind has given up.

But my soul didn't.
This attempt is for my soul. For my 'being'. For the 'real me'.

This is my first thread in the 'rebooting section'.

And bros, I can guarantee you that, I am one of the worst sufferers in this entire forum, if not 'The Worst'.

And I want to show everybody here and to myself that, if I can succeed, then 'goddamn anybody in the whole wide world' can overcome this addiction.

So, my attempt is also dedicated to everyone who is trying to overcome this addiction.

Please bear with me. I will try my best not to disappoint you.

 

Not finding it easy, even in the beginning. So, let me remind myself a very good German quotation.

Aller Anfang ist schwer. (Every beginning is difficult/hard.)

1 day at a time bro....1 day at a time.

 

Came across this today....plain-jane 'Powerhouse' in my honest opinion :

Im Mittelmaß gibt es Trost, aber keine Freude.
Wenn du deine Grenzen überschreitest, gibt es Freude, aber vielleicht keinen Trost.
Du musst auswählen.

( In mediocrity, there is comfort, but no joy.
If you exceed your limits, there will be joy, but perhaps no comfort.
You have to choose. )

For a mega-failure like me , there comes a point, when you really really have to decide/choose.

I think for me, the time is now.

I choose 'Joy', because I know what true pain is. Discomfort (withdrawl symptoms) is million times better than 'Lifelong Pain'.

 

It has only been 3 days....but I already feel much better.

Just 1 day at a time.

And always remember :

Discomfort (withdrawl symptoms) is million times better than 'Lifelong Pain'.

 

Show us all it’s possible!! Be the face of fighting this disease!!!

I believe in you brother! Stay strong and always vigilant, never give an inch on day 1, day 30,60,90, 1 year!!

 

You should look into monk mode as well

 

Thank you so much bro.....can't thank u enough for showing faith in me....

 

Thanks bro....I did look into the 'Monk Mode' n realised that....m very nearly doing the 'monk mode'. The only media I ingest is related to my 'work'....other than that no media at all...none. Thanks again

 

Thank you bro....yes I am aptly motivated....won't let you down.

 

Nice man, I wish I got the willpower to do monk mode, wouldn’t last a week :/. Well, all you gotta do now is hardmode and eat clean, meditate and get your 8 hours of sleep, you’ll be a different man for sure if you keep it up

 

I do believe in you! You can do it! Show us it’s possible!

 

Ya, let's really do this....let's show ourselves and the world at large....what we are really made of. Thank you brother. All of you are giving me tremendous support and impetus. Feeling really blessed.

 

Yes I am eating clean. In fact I became a vegetarian by choice almost 3 years back. I try to meditate twice daily (for the last 1 month).....sleep 6+ hours (yes...I always sleept less than average)....exercising for the last 1 month (alternating between 'Yoga' and 'Pushup and weight training'....i.e one day 'yoga' and the next day 'push up'). I sleep by 12:00 am and get up at 6:30 am. Following a routine and am almost as disciplined as a 'German' I guess.

To be fair enough to myself.....I am almost giving my best.....and with the 'wonderful advice', 'Love' and 'faith' from you guys...very soon I will be giving my best.

I feel very confident that....nth can stop me now....from achieving my goal.

Thanks again bro....from the bottom of my heart.

 

Thanks for the wonderful advice bro. As I am learning German and Russian (lower intermediate in German and advanced beginner in Russian)....I have customised my facebook profile in such a way that....only German and Russian posts can be seen (my Facebook language is also in German)....so if I log in Facebook....it's only German and Russian for me. And to read that....I have to expend my energy, use the dictionary....so it becomes a part of my 'Foreign language study time'. After just 5 mins...I am tired....so I log out....and on top of that, I follow no one in Facebook.....so I can't see any posts of my friends and family.

And yes, I have no Instagram or Twitter account.

I have stopped seeing movies altogether (Indian, Hollywood or foreign films)....again if I watch a movie....it's only German with German subtitles (man it's so tiresome)....say 10 mins a day.....and that being a part of my 'German language learning'.

And last of all....I don't watch TV at all...earlier I used to watch only news...but I have stopped that too for the last 15 days.

So, there is no ingestion of 'Media for entertainment purpose' in my life any more. Only media that I ingest....is related to 'my work' and 'Spirituality'....say a presentation on 'Supply chaing management' in Youtube or a video on spiritual knowledge by 'Sadhguru' like the one below (you might like to watch it once...it's really good)




I am almost giving my best. And thanks again for the 'advice', faith and love. I really mean it from the bottom of my heart bro.

 

Then all you need now is nofap!! You got this, show me how’s it done, can’t get past couple of weeks, it’s hard, but I believe you can!! I never wanna see you reset! Show me how to do it brother! Peace love and positivity to you!

 

Thank you so much for the kind and uplifting words.....this much I can tell you bro...I will try my best and more...And I will remember your words....coz it will strengthen my 'will power' at the time of crisis (iff it comes).

 

We are all in this together!

 

Three fantastic and inspiring quotes, the third one is my all time favourite quote (atleast for the time being) :

''For the person who has learned to let go and let be, nothing can ever get in the way again.''
- Meister Eckhart (14th century German monk)

'' Grow from the past but grab hold of now. ''The Now'' is always evolving.''
- Rumi (13th century Persian mystic)

''In the heart of this moment is eternity.''
- Meister Eckhart