Maintain NoFap in the absence of sexual partners?

I sure think about this a lot. I am 68yo and a widower of 8 years.Been pretty much a PMO addict way before my wife passed away. I came to NoFap after realizing my too frequent PMO was causing ED issues when I had sex with my new partner. I just know that as my partner and I term older sex may not be so often, or we may just go our separate ways.It would probably be so unlikely for me to find another sex partner at this stage of my life.What then,never orgasm again? It has been many years since in have been able to MO without porn.When I was married and horny I would MO in the shower.I really don't know how long I could go without an orgasm.

 

In my humble opinion, even in the absense of sexual partners, for me NoFap is the way to go. Trying to rationalize and/or pity myself into masturbation will (sooner or later) lead me back into porn. Also, as hookers and one-night stands are just not for me, I see celibacy as the best choice for me.

 

Wish I could answer your question but I can't because I've never had sex. This comment seems kind of useless after typing that train of thought however I'd like to imagine if I maintain coming to this sight it will payoff in someway. The most important part for me is seeing women for people and not just parts like in P.

 

I have this exact same issue and have done most my life... Now I am 41 years old and just going through divorce (my choice due to toxic marriage, not related to PMO). We was married for 8 years and sex became less and less frequent due to me not really loving her even though she was actually extremely attractive. Rather it was her horrible character that put me off more and more and it was an extremely miserable marriage. Plus I was working tirelessly in a job I hated to be the breadwinner and again, this meant no life for me through most of my 30's adding to my misery. Now she has gone and although peaceful, I am EXTREMELY lonely and have literally no money to go out and meet real people in real life so that has caused me to relapse so often over past few months even though I had my 2 or 3 greatest streaks of no PMO (about 6 or 7 days 2 or 3 times over). That is positive I guess, but I have been PMO since the internet started and of course before meeting my wife, I literally had hardly any sexual experience in real life and when I did, I suffered from performance anxiety and likely ED at age 27-31 which I still have I am sure It was humiliating that when chances came, I probably couldn't fully take them.... To make matters worse, then came the toxic marriage and of course PMO just continued hidden behind my wife although she found out. Also, I currently happen to sit next to my crush at work which is killing me because out of everyone (maybe 200 females at my place of work) she is the one I have feelings for and I fantasise about being with her, but I screwed that up as I didn't have the "balls" to ask her out and the moment has long gone. That said, she is 27 and she hinted big time about how 40 year olds hit on her and she finds it creepy and that's why I never made a move early on (should of asked at time "does that include me"). Also worth noting that most people always put me as way younger than I am around early 30's so I am blessed in this area of life at least! Despite her going on about 40 year olds hitting on her and how it wasn't a good thing, she flirted with me big time and so the signals were incredibly mixed at the time and with lack of confidence on inside I couldn't get the stones to ask her out. Clearly she loves the attention she gets from other males at work and she is always messaging with them and has lots of male friends but seems to be single most of the time.... it's as if she is a bit of a tease and gets off on men "chasing her"..... So that is driving me insane as I get "tingles down below" even though I cant get fully erect due to PMO for past 20 years..... Then to make matters worse, I am on tinder for no other reason than I have no money to meet females in real life and that triggers me also.... Again lots of matches due to looking good for my age, but very little messages due to being unmatched later.... Issue currently is that although I don't need a female, I can't help the natural feelings of being lonely and wanting to meet females for company if nothing else..... I would settle for just meeting some females over a cup of coffee! But how to do this with no spare money at end of the month I also have plenty to do in spare time from home as I am an online poker player and do make small money from that, though too small to be able to withdraw for life and anyway need money to keep moving forward in poker career ( have been playing for 10 years).... And again, I can distract myself to a point immersing myself in poker which is a very healthy hobby as I know what I am doing and do it sensibly, but.... that doesn't stop natural male urges of wanting female company.... Hence the need to be on Tinder even though the energy it takes to probably meet a female through that app is high..... This is a bit of a longer post than I wanted and apologies especially as it is my first post! But I wanted to give a snapshot of where I am at. Luckily my crush has a new job and should be leaving at end of January, so since I am not so attracted to any other females at work and certainly not on my team, that may help me focus better....... Also find that when I am apart from her for ages, my feelings repress which is good... I realise now that I should of asked her out (even if getting rejected) way back about 3-4 months ago, but its gone now and dynamic has changed. It was just the combination of sitting next to each other and awkwardness that could cause as well as not wanting to come across as that "creepy" 41 year old etc.... Plus lots of people work around us so hard to get her alone to actually ask her out! And she takes other collegues home after work so again wasn't so many opportunities. Then there was my internal issues such as divorce, lack of confidence from toxic marriage, not loving my job, PMO in background, PIED etc... Would love accountability partner also as I really want to ween myself of this porn which I would say I am mega addicted to. It's probably similar to a crack addict which luckily I am not addicted to! In fact I have no other major addictions apart from tea. It's just that online porn is so amazing and a way of experiencing many of the things I never managed to when I was younger I guess. And I suppose the less money I have to be able to go out and enjoy life, the less opportunities there have been through life to actually forge "actual relationships" which is why it all seems foreign to me.... It should be noted that once divorce goes through and hopefully I take over mortgage, i can potentially get another source of income from renting out a room and I am looking for a better paid job though that's not so easy in these times... Plus I am improving in poker big time over the past year so that may eventually yield enough money that I can withdraw some too.... but in meantime Sorry for the ramble, but I needed to get it all off my chest and any advice anybody can give will be greatly appreciated Actually with potentially better job, poker going well and gettign out of toxic marriage, there are also many positives too and I believe 2018 looks promising. Adding NOFAP to that will also be a good thing

 

Tossingoff,the only advice I an give is if you don't MO it may give you the drive to actively find a real lady. If your crush is leaving the job perhaps it your chance to ask her to go to a lunch or dinner as friends and see how it goes.Cant lose for trying.

 

If you were totally incel without any chance of, let's say parole, I would say fuck it, go full PMO. You're not saving yourself for anyone. What's a negative to one man (it makes you want to fuck real people less) is a positive to another.

But if you are scoring on occasion, that clearly indicates that you can improve yourself to the point where you can score more and better... so I would focus time and energy on that. Get to the gym. Get to some social clubs/groups. Peronsally a big fan of public speaking training like Toastmasters.

Remember that real, happy, healthy dopamine release comes from having goals and visibly making progress towards them, and that's what happiness is, when you get right down to it. But if you're burning it all out on PMO...