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Reminder: It's all bullshit, and it's designed to keep you in a depressed state

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Porn Free Wanderer, Jan 1, 2018.

  1. Porn Free Wanderer

    Porn Free Wanderer Fapstronaut

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    Disclaimer: This is not science, this is just my opinion.

    I wasn't sure which section to post this in, but this one seems to be the most fitting of the available forums. I was torn between this one or "Self Improvement".

    "It's all bullshit" was a favourite routine of the now deceased comedian George Carlin (check out some of his stuff on youtube). It's now 10 years since his passing. I suspect he'd have a field day with our modern society. This is a list of things I think are not only bullshit, but are specifically designed/intended to make you, the viewer, feel like shit so people can make money off you.

    1. Porn.
    This one is obvious, and is the reason we're all here. Porn offers a fantasy world to which you can escape when things in the real world get tough. Now that in itself isn't a major problem - sometimes we all need a break to regroup. But what do we find in this fantasy world? We find men with large genitalia and women who love having sex with them. In fact, according to these women everything that man does is wonderful.

    It's bullshit. Complete bullshit. In the real world, porn performers regularly take drugs to numb the pain (both physical and emotional) of what they have to do. The list of porn actors who have committed suicide is a long one. And while they claim to "enjoy" it in interviews they do at the time, few of them want to talk about the experience after they leave the industry.

    What porn does do is make you feel like shit every time you watch it. It plants messages in your mind. "Oh, I can't ever get a woman like this". "Gee, I wish I was endowed like that guy". "Oh, listen to the way she's moaning, damn that must feel good, I could never make her feel like that" and on and on. It's intended to make you feel like shit so you'll keep going back to the well. You'll keep wanting to tranquillise those negative feelings with more porn, which they're only too happy to provide so you can feel worse and worse about yourself.

    The way to break the cycle is to stay away. Stay away from paid porn. Stay away from "free" porn (which cuts their advertising revenue and makes it harder for them to acquire new content). If you want to find out what women really think of you, go and meet some. Sharpen your game, practice, and maybe you'll be the guy who can please them. You won't even have to inject your genitals with silicon. Just make sure you meet them face-to-face (more on that later).

    2. Social Media.
    Social media is bullshit. Facebook, Instagram, Tumblr and all the others - I'm sure there are plenty I didn't mention here. I was reading about this recently when I was wondering how "cyber bullying" became such an issue. My thought was, "Cyber bullying not like real-world bullying because you can just turn off the computer and escape it". Turns out I wasn't quite right.

    I've been reading a book called "The Cyber Effect" by Dr Mary Aiken (a good read btw, look it up on Amazon.com). She argues that many people today have two 'selves'. They have an online persona that is carefully cultivated, air-brushed and sanitised. And they have a 'real' self that is often hidden away, or at least hidden behind the on-line persona. When a person experiences cyber-bullying or anything approaching it, the online persona that they've spend time and effort cultivating is suddenly worthless. That might also explain why so many people are more obnoxious online -- knocking down someone else's fake persona is a way to build up their own fake persona just a little, and they don't have to worry about a fist in their own mouth if the other person takes exception to it (usually).

    The other way Social Media makes us feel like shit is far more obvious. We look at someone's Facebook feed or Instagram photos, and everything we see is air-brushed. The bad or boring bits are omitted. Our own lives seem pretty average and mundane by comparison. It's very easy for us to feel like shit when all we see on our FB feed are pictures of "friends" we've never met taking vacations to exotic places or doing amazing things, all without any mention of what they had to sacrifice do do those things.

    Social media is bullshit. Sure, it has some positive aspects. It's a convenient way to message people you're going out with on the weekend. It's a convenient way to stay in touch with people you meet. I'm not necessarily saying everyone should get rid of it, but use it judiciously, and apply a sensible amount of skepticism to things you might read there.

    3. Online dating.
    This won't be a popular addition to the list, but I feel it has to be added and is highly appropriate. The original Freakonomics book discussed online dating (among other things). The research those guys did concluded that people on dating sites are generally taller, thinner, richer and more accomplished than average. How easy it is to log into one of these sites or apps and feel depressed when comparing one's real self to someone else's cyber self. Does anyone ever wonder how it is that these amazing people are struggling to meet partners in real life? If it looks and smells like bullshit, it's probably… (you can fill in the gap).

    Well here's one possible explanation: In 2006 match.com and Yahoo personals were the two biggest dating sites on Earth, and they were both exposed for posting fake profiles to make it look like they had more women than they actually did. That might explain where some of these "above average" people came from. One of them was even reported to have sent one of their office girls on a date with some guy so he'd keep paying their monthly subscription fee.

    That's not to say that it's impossible to meet people this way. The people who run those websites frequently like to point to stories of people who actually did hook up, and in the absence of any evidence to the contrary, I'm prepared to accept those stories as truth. After all, we've all seen how easily people will believe things they read online just because it's what they want to believe (more on that later). However, I don't believe those stories represent a majority of the people who pay for these sites or apps, and they've never told us how many of the people who met their future husband or wife this way are still married.

    For me, online dating is bullshit. Right now I'm in no hurry to jump into a relationship anyway, but if I was, I'd be looking to meet people in the real world that I could actually learn about before I disclosed anything too personal to them. While I'm doing so, I could actually sharpen some of my personal skills at the same time, which I might be able to use on the next person I meet.


    There are probably others I could add to this list, but this should get me started. Now why would these things be designed to make us all feel like shit? After all, what would be the point? Maybe it's because people who feel depressed are more likely to spend money on external shit in an attempt to feel better about themselves. A guy who feels like his dick is too small, his muscles too weak or his life too boring is usually going be willing to part with more money than a guy who is satisfied with his lot in life, or just doesn't care either way.

    I read somewhere once that a lot of the major porn producing studios are actually owned by Fortune 500 companies. This may or may not be true, but given that those companies rely on selling us shit we don't need, I suspect that even if they aren't directly responsible for the way so many people feel these days, they won't be doing anything to stop it.

    Consequently, my recommendation (and something I'll be pursuing in the future) is a complete abstinence from items 1 and 3 on that list, and a dramatic cutback on item 2 (which I still think has *some* value if used appropriately).

    What things do you think are complete bullshit to add to this list?
     
    IdleEyes49, sneket, ayato and 9 others like this.
  2. Runtilmylegsdropoff

    Runtilmylegsdropoff Fapstronaut

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  3. Reborn16

    Reborn16 Fapstronaut

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    Great well written post!

    I did watch a bit of Carlin a few years ago, and sometimes think what he would have to say about today's bullshit. Political correctness could be annihilated in one show...

    What other bullshit? I sincerely hope everyone's B.S. alarms are going off when they see ads on TV encouraging 'binge watching' and using unlimited data on our phones and computers while purposefully avoiding friends and family. Like that's the way to go to enjoy life, lmao!
     
  4. Porn Free Wanderer

    Porn Free Wanderer Fapstronaut

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    Oh yeah, TV is a huge source of bullshit. I'll address that in more detail tomorrow when I have more time (looks like I'll have to write a part 2 to my post above). But basically, TV ads telling you that you'll be worthless if you don't buy this product, news and media encouraging fear all the time to make us feel scared (sometimes even emasculated).
     
    Reborn16 likes this.
  5. im_alive

    im_alive Fapstronaut

  6. The Watcher

    The Watcher Fapstronaut

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    exactly, Porn makes you feel like a loser and the more loser you feel the more it becomes a habit and shape your life in that way.

    I agree with you on social media it builds the 3 killers which are Comparison, Judge and blaming but if we are aware it can be so useful we can use it to learn something new everyday from it we can use it to uplift people support and help them like we do here in this forum we share our experiences with each other it can build an integrity which is a very good thing we learn from each other.
     
  7. Porn Free Wanderer

    Porn Free Wanderer Fapstronaut

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    4. Strippers and escorts
    Most of us would argue that this falls under the heading of porn, but just in case it doesn't. Do not take strippers or escorts seriously. If you have given money to a stripper or an escort (something I definitely DO NOT recommend), you should be aware that those women (or men in some cases) are using you. They are saying what you want to hear so that you will continue to pay them. As an aside, this is a mistake I have made in the past myself, but never again.

    It is very rare that an escort will enjoy providing those services for you. She has likely already provided those services to several other men that day, and it's highly unlikely that you are so special that she's going to overcome her extreme boredom of the whole situation when she sees you. The same thing goes for strippers. Those women have already had countless men staring at their body that night, or earlier that week. You aren't so special that she's going to fall in love with you, which is probably extremely fortunate for you, since most of them have other issues that a future boyfriend would have to deal with (that's how they got into stripping in the first place).

    Just stay right away from them. There's probably nothing worse you could do with your money than waste it on strippers and escorts.

    (more to come tomorrow)...
     
    Reborn16 and im_alive like this.
  8. Troels. L

    Troels. L Fapstronaut

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    I have developed more willpower to resisting watching porn and keeping urges at bay. I simply paid for sex with a prostitute, you might argue this is worse, but is it really the case? You keep the industry running by watching and visiting porn sites. Facebook operates the same way, do you think Mark Zuckerberg struggles finacially? No his income is beyond anyone's imagination. If all took action to stay clean from porn, the industry would plummete. Porn sites are in fact the most viewed site ever existed on the internet.
     
  9. TomMoin

    TomMoin Fapstronaut

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    this thread is just awesome. all i have read was resourcefull. thank you guys.

    had a small laughter on this one:

    “Can a man stand alone, naked, and at his ease, wrist flexed at his side like Michelangelo’s David, without assistance, without diversion…in silence? Yes. It is possible to stand. Nothing happened. I listened. There was no sound: no boats on the river, no trucks on the road, not even cicada. What if I didn’t listen to the news? I didn’t. Nothing happened. I realized I had been afraid of the silence.”
     
  10. LilD

    LilD Fapstronaut

    I can add to the list. It's just my opinion.

    Religions. The rules of this forum ask to avoid discussing this topic, so I'll just say that Mr. Carlin had told enough about it. "I became a sun worshiper."

    "Spiritual" cults, aka "not-quite religions". I will not name them, but I'll say I've been through it, and I saw the bottom. Some of them are still legal in many countries, but I hope the humankind will become smart enough to at least identify those as the source of all kind of problems.

    Bitcoin&co. Of course, it has some real value as a technology, as well as a replacement for legacy systems. But most of its price is based on speculations. Everyone and their dog buys Bitcoin in a hope that it will worth more tomorrow, and so they tell all their friends about it, so they would buy Bitcoin too, so it will go up in price. What happens next, you can read about in any articles on Ponzi schemes. Maybe some other cryptocurrencies are not like that, but I'm not sure. And certainly, I think that the technology itself can be used for something good.

    Most of the books on self-improvement. I talk about those in which an author from Beverly Hills tells a reader from a poor village in the middle of northern Siberia to get out of their comfort zone.
     
  11. The Watcher

    The Watcher Fapstronaut

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    Spirituality is the most closest process to modern science it is not a religion or a cult but it takes the best from all of them that help us grow as living beings
     
  12. LilD

    LilD Fapstronaut

    @The Watcher, I've heard these words one too many times. I don't believe any of it.
     
    The Watcher likes this.
  13. Porn Free Wanderer

    Porn Free Wanderer Fapstronaut

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    Having done it myself and having suffered from that addiction, I can definitely tell you that yes, it is worse. It's someone who says a few nice things to you, but in all reality doesn't respect you for any longer than it takes them to take your money. Not to mention the risk of STDs and all the rest of it.
     
    Deleted Account and im_alive like this.
  14. cwhittena

    cwhittena New Fapstronaut

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    The food industry: They pump you full of sugar so you crave more, it actually operates like our dopamine cycle that porn produces. I have no doubt they are addicting us on purpose.

    Alcohol and cigarrettes too.

    Keeping us quiet, stupid, and busy.
     
  15. Troels. L

    Troels. L Fapstronaut

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    At least you have skin to skin contact, and in my case i lost my virginity. I think in terms of morality, it's the same. You keep feeding the industry by watching porn, their income is huge.
     
  16. MillwallMatters

    MillwallMatters Fapstronaut

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    Great post.

    social media, porn, any sort of internet inspired compulsion (Such as logging in ten times to this forum to see if anyone has replied to this post!!!) - these are taking over our minds, our feelings, our wills. the temptation to throw my phone against the wall every time i disappear down an internet black hole gets stronger by the day.

    really think and contemplate a life with zero internet. i have done this recently. it gets ever more seductive. Peace and quiet, contemplation, freedom. Maybe one of the most radical things a human can do these days is to have no internet connection. Just an unattached, floating mind in a connected world.

    How long until everyone is slightly stooped? That being slightly stooped is the default posture for humans? Slightly stooped through the constant looking down at their phones? That someone with a straight back is seen as a freak!

    I am in the process of rethinking my relationship with the internet. I want to be free of 90% of it.
     
  17. ReZen8ster

    ReZen8ster Fapstronaut

    Modern medicine - how many prescription medicine commercials do you see nightly if you watch TV. Some medicines like antibiotics and disease vaccines are awesome. But all the bullshit they are trying to force on us is just that bullshit.
     
  18. Porn Free Wanderer

    Porn Free Wanderer Fapstronaut

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    Definitely. We should be trying to eat as many raw foods or at least fruits and vegetables as possible. It's actually quite scary how much shit food one will find in the average super market these days. There are some aisles in the average super market that are best avoided completely.
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  19. Porn Free Wanderer

    Porn Free Wanderer Fapstronaut

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    Believe me when I say I'm not saying you're a bad person. After all, I lost my virginity the same way. I don't attack you morally, I just don't think it's the best thing you can do for yourself.
     
    Deleted Account and Troels. L like this.

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