The restart of a journey

Today I restart my journey , although I have been here before and know what the challenges ahead are.. I regret slipping and falling back to porn. this year has bin a hell of a year struggled alot. I hope I can stay strong and pull through for myself and my loved ones

 

Thanks alot , I wish you the best in your challenge as well

 

Yes it is , for more than pmo too.. can help alot

 

Day 2 is looking to be okay, having strong insomnia tho, probably due to bad habits formed . I can't imagine myself as a sleep early guy. I am an amateur programmer currently struggling my way through php. sleeping isn't my best friend . hope today will be good tho .

 

It is a big issue for me too, I don't know if I should learn to accept it or force myself to change ... what do you intend to do about it ?

 

Yeah it is difficult but can be done with time and patience

 

Today was an okay day.. woke up way to late. was excited about Chelsea win tho was very wonderful game. I am talking to this strong Christian girl that makes me feel happy , when I talk to some other girls I have had something to do with or i know i can if I worked harder, all I do is have sexual thoughts(objectifying them). I am also caught in this thought of not wanting to be played , I kind of see the worst in most girls , thier need to use guys for money or to cheat. because I have friends that have bin cheated on and more that sleep with this girls that are in a relationship. maybe they are not all the same but the fear of bin played makes me rethink things . this girl makes me calm and thino of God more, but imagine if I find out something nasty about her, will that break my believe totally . I need to kill this habit

 

Today has gone quite okay. I have bin sleeping alot this days tho . there is a passage in the bible for people who sleep and lose thier way lol, that might be extreme but I believe it to be true . met up with an old friend . I usually relapse on Sundays so I have to be strong . lost my habit of going to church.feels like I just give myself excuses not to go tho

 

i know bro.. i know

 

i didn't make any changes , I just let it be having regrets now though slipped back to many times since this thread , the girl didn't work out in this thread .. Lol just felt I had to reply you were keeping up with me then. Thanks a lot

 

I am back at it again , I am planning on joining fellowship I think I need it to be around people trying to make their lifes better.So the girl in this thread didn't work out , I feel like I relied on her way to much maybe I wanted us to share our burdens .. No mention about pmo but she learnt a lot about me and I don't regret it (i think lol). I think this journey for happiness is between you and God, they are no shortcuts it doesn't exist (you can't expect someone to hold your hand through it).i actually relapsed today but I gained a new strength and I hope I will build my life more , negative thoughts can destroy a man. Anyone have ideas on changing your mind or renewing is a good word, my brain is filled with bad images and I can't not meet someon new and not have them. Any help ?? I love you all let's keep fighting

 

Yeah bro I am an amateur programmer myself, I feel like our need to be always with our laptops alone causes us to relapse and we have to stay up at night working on things they needs to be a way out, we will get out bro. My sleeping is still messed up I feel like I don't do enough during the days , no much physical activities you know