My thoughts on working out/ why it is so important in NoFap

In 2014, I figured if I had a six-pack, the confidence issue I had would disappear and I could finally talk to girls. Afterwards I wouldn't have a need for PMO. I was a business major, 19 years old, weighed 170lbs, and couldn't run half a mile or do 1 pullup.

It's 2018. I'm in school for Physical Therapy after finding an passion for human physiology(from working out to beat PMO). I weigh a cool 195 lbs and even though I have a six pack, I don't give a fuck about it. I can squat almost 400lbs, deadlift over 500lbs, bench almost 300lbs, completed 2 tough mudders(a 10 mile run/obstacle course) and a whole lot of 5k's(on the spot usually).

This isn't an ego post; a "look at me" article where I'm looking for praise or validation. I just want to tell you about what working out did for me. You're not me, but this can still apply to you.

My whole life I have been a very unmotivated individual. Having to work hard to get something just wasn't part of my MO. Learning to put in that work regardless of how I feel, denying myself things that hindered my progress, and dropping the ego are three things that I needed to achieve to obtain the body I wanted. Slowly progressing in these aspects carried over into other parts of my life. PMO, work, and school most importantly.

I somewhat consider myself a special case. I found such a passion for the human body, for bettering ourselves physically and mentally, that I made it my career. It's like what PMO dished out to me(objectification of women, mental/physical weakness etc.), I'm throwing right back at it with five times more force. How satisfying is that?

Here is what I learned about working out:
1. I just had to get to the gym, once I started the first exercise it was much less difficult to imagine finishing the workout.

2. Pain sucks, I hate pain. I hate running, I hate ab exercises, HIIT cardio; they all suck. I learned to deal with the pain because I was sick of avoiding it so much. It only sucks thinking about how much pain I'm going to feel. Once I start feeling it I become a monster. I'm going to take it because I know I can.

3. For the past three years I've known exactly what I was going to do each day, each week. I had a goal to work to. For three years running of unbroken consistency in planning and following it, my rate of progress has been absolutely incredible.

4. I researched workout/nutrition facts and methods. I asked questions. I became knowledgable in the craft of sculpting my body so I may reap the benefits in my later years instead of suffering chronic issues from mistakes I could have avoided by learning. I never stop learning. If something hurts/feels off, I do my research. This has proven very effective in keeping my body healthy while lifting very heavy.

5. I learned to look like a fool. You'll never know how to do an exercise right unless you make a mistake first. People can be so afraid to try something new because they are afraid of looking bad or doing it wrong. I learned to take those risks, learn from failure.

6. No matter what I succeed at, I remind myself to stay quiet. Fuck the ego, fuck the motivation. I'm here to always get better and to help others get better. I learned to be selfless in what I was told is a very selfish obsession.

Why these 6 lessons apply to your life/PMO:

1. If the task is repulsive, stop thinking and just start doing it. The likelihood of you finishing it then is infinitely greater than when you procrastinate. When you have an urge, doing anything else besides PMO doesn't sound as attractive. Start doing it anyway and the habit of action will build and become easier.

2. Stress, embarrassment, anxiety. All different sources of pain in our lives. Keep going, navigate through the bullshit. The pain is hard I know. It's awful and you wouldn't wish it on your worst enemy. Once you realize you pushed through it though? Trust me, you won't think twice about doing it again and again. Hell, you'll become so good at dealing with life you might just be successful. LEARN TO BECOME COMFORTABLE WITH THE UNCOMFORTABLE.

3. Have a plan. Every day, every week, every year. Have goals and plans for your goals. Have plans for when you get urges, for when something tough comes along. Take time to think it through. I guarantee you no successful person or company just improvised their way to the top.

4. Know your enemy. Learn about dopamine, the different types of coping, what porn can do your brain. Contemplate on your habits, reactions, strengths, and weaknesses. Continuously learn throughout your life new things that create a positive change in your life.

5. FAIL. Fail to resist PMO, to meet your goals, to follow your plan. Failure is the path to success. Failure will teach you more than success ever could. Most importantly, after that relapse, be positive! Don't kid yourself, realize that you failed and you will have to try to adjust so you can resist next time. But look forward to trying again! In school, use feedback from grades and evaluate your learning techniques so you can improve.

6. Be a good person The humility from failure and the optimism you carry is like a light in the dark. A lot of the time when people see someone successful they reject the notion that success could ever be a reality for them. Expose yourself, your weaknesses, who your are, what you've been through. Show yourself to people in hope that instead of placing you on a pedestal, they see you as someone to strive be and surpass.

Conclusion:
As of 2/8/18, My streak is 17 days. However i feel like I've already beaten it because I of what I've learned to do. The ease of which the past 17 days has been is the culmination of all the battles I've been through and learned from. It's a little past 8 in the morning as I write this. I'm tired, I have so much homework, I don't want to do any of it, and I don't care that I don't want to. Let's win this together, for each other.

~Adam Sagun
University at Buffalo

 

In my personal experience, my confidence about how I looked skyrocketed! I felt healthier, more capable, stronger. This self-confidence began to translate over into the confidence levels I had for talking to girls/strangers. However, I always an innate hesitation or awkwardness I could not shake and I knew it was because I hadn't beat PMO yet. I couldn't really talk to a girl without defaulting to thoughts about sex or how I didn't see myself as good enough to be in a relationship yet. I notice that it is not until my mental self-confidence matches my physical self confidence that I felt like this got way better. I guess it goes hand-in-hand with the, "train your mind as hard as you train your body" type of deal.