help me i'm desperate

Hate to break it to you but no one here can help you. You have to want to help yourself and it's up to you to fix it.

 

I know...that in this point in time you must feel broken, as if life is worthless. You must understand life does not wait for you, you need to take action in order to end your addiction. You atleast have accepted the truth, now...make a difference in your life, no one has to tell you porn is bad, you know that, so, how will you solve this issue?

 

Let's look at the bright side for a quick second, I see that you are 14.. The fact that you are even aware of this NoFap community at such a young age is such a blessing. There are so many people on here who which they could've found out about NoFap at such a young age. Take it one day at a time and try not to overthink things.

When it comes to urges I try my best to remember why I started NoFap. Cold showers help too. Also, you can always reach out here and make a post. And one of the biggest triggers in my opinion is boredom. Stay busy and focus on your goals, hang out with friends, read a book, play a sport, learn a new language.. Your options are endless. I also recommend you make a journal on here. Stay strong! And don't be too hard on yourself if you do relapse.

 

Stop indulging in urges. If you let urges roam around in your head they eventually come to fruition and take control over you, leaving you feeling helpless after you relapse. As soon as you get any thought that could lead you to relapse, cut it off. To do this you must self moniker and be very aware of your thoughts.

Best of luck , you've already proven to yourself that you can abstain for a good chunk of time!

 

Its a blessing that you found Nofap so young.

At your age is harsh to control your urges because you are in a so critical age.

I advise you to seek activities and if you fail dont be too hard on yourself.

 

I understand your sentiment was that we can't create the change in him, only he can but saying "no one here can help you" isn't helpful and could be easily misunderstood.

@Cyrex I agree with many things @Lazarus Shuttlesworth said, you're so fortunate to be starting this journey at your age. You don't have to beat yourself up about a relapse. Try challenging yourself to just increase the number of days between them. Try @2525's 7 day challenge when you think you are ready for it. In the meantime you could just challenge yourself to get to 4 days. Keeping a journal could help you. What I have found to be a great tool in this is learning mindfulness meditation. I highly recommend the Headspace app. More specifically the practice of urge surfing will really help you in emergencies. Here are two you can use when urges hit:

• http://depts.washington.edu/abrc/mbrp/recordings/Urge Surfing.mp3
  
• https://player.fm/series/10-happier-with-dan-harris/guided-meditation-holiday-stress-surf-the-urge

Like Laz said, keep yourself busy. Engage with the real world. Have fun. Connect with the people around you. That is truly the antithesis of this addiction. And don't forget that you can reach out to us on here when you're having a hard time.

The most important thing to remember is that you only ever have to concern yourself with one day, today. Don't worry about what you did yesterday or what you think will happen tomorrow.

 

I think the first poster said it. You have to be the one who does not masturbate. Here are some tips. Go to bed early. Stay off the computer unless you absolutely need to do homework or something important. Cold showers. Run exercise. Try meditation. I know it sounds drastic, but if you really want to stop maybe to tell your parents. That might sound embarrassing but if you really want to stop having your mom or dad checking on you would make anyone stop. Get off Instagram, Facebook, and all social media. Don’t watch R rated sexy movies. Make yourself some goals. Join a school sport and fill your day with sports, by the time you get home you’ll be exhausted. Get a porn blocker on your phone and computer. Good luck and just don’t do it.