Can you forgive a spouse who did virtual reality porn!?

porn is a huge problem and a lot of people including myself did it for years without even realising it was a problem, so untill he thinks of it as a problem he won't help himself because if you make the effort to buy a vr for porn it's obviously somthing he enjoys doing. try and talk to him about it Carmly and in a supportive way! Porn is a huge problem in the world and its getting harder to avoid for everyone and with technology getting the way it is it's even harder to quit

 

Have you expressed to him how you feel when he does that?
When my wife confronted me about my porn use, it was a good step in my recovery.

 

IMO, anything where there is an interaction with a live person would be worse. That includes cam sex, prostitutes or affairs -- in that order of badness. I think there is a dividing line between viewing and interacting, but what to forgive is of course your call.

 

Then you have one solution

 

Literally take his headset and smash it to bits, I’m serious.
That is very poor behaviour from your husband, some serious discipline is appropriate imo.

 

Blackswan, if you haven't done so already I would suggest counseling as a first step.

Unfortunately, he isn't going to snap out of his addiction and it will take a lot of effort on his part, though the good thing is he will have an accountability partner in you.

 

Then why tolerate it? Kick him out!

 

If I may chime in, I know that I ruined intimacy in my last relationship by looking at stuff 2-3x a week. Rigorous honesty is in order I would think. Hopefully counseling. Outside of an illness/accident, intimacy needs to be part of a relationship/marriage. I hope it works out but of course you want to make the decision best for you.