I might commit suicide...

Hi @Ouch,

I was there once. I know the feeling all too well. It promises a sense of fulfillment but leaves us empty and alone. I had deep anxiety and depression as a result BUT this all can be overcome. I am now a fuctioning member of society and a better father, huband, son, man...

You are NOT alone ! Post here or PM me if you need to chat to someone - I will make my time available to you !

Cheers
Kev

 

@Ouch ?

 

Hey @Ouch, try to relax and focus on something other than your thoughts. It is best if you go outside, to a place with lots of people. If you have anyone who you can talk about that in person (or at least on a phone), do so.

Remember, that no matter how bad you feel right now, it's temporary. I've been thinking about suicide during my darkest years, every day, sometimes all day long. Every night, before falling asleep, I made a wish to die quietly and painlessly in my sleep. Now, several years later, I don't want to die anymore. My life is not perfect, very far from what I'd like it to be, but it's getting better. I never thought it was possible, but it was. And it means it can be possible for you too.

Ask for help. You can do so here, on this forum. If you have some heavy feeling and thoughts, write about them here. It's easier when you tell somebody.

 

Suicide hotline

Uk : 116 123
US : 1-800-273-8255

 

Ouch, I perfectly understand how you feel, but please, take a step back to analyse why you keep relapsing, like I do every time, and each time I get to know more about why I relapsed, and developp better tools to help me. I relapsed again yesterday, but found out that 90 days without PMO is just too much for me in my situation. So I will stop PM but will allow orgasm once in a while, to control urges that are part of the main reasons I relapse. When I have made a good period of no PM, not to destroy my success, then I think I will be able to attack PMO for 90 days or so.

But please find the tools that work for you, do not commit suicide..... Because then porn has won... So many have overcome that addiction, together we can beat the devil... You deserve to be free from that shit... Please consider the advice from all Fapstronauts who answered you call for help.... We want you safe and sound my friend....

 

Please your life is precious people care about you don’t hurt them or yourself they love you, you need to love yourself, life will get better my friend you can get through this you can win! we all go through our weaknesses don’t surrender to them completely, always get back up and fight you are worth it you could have an amazing life and family in the future you could be happy with all of your accomplishments don’t give that up!

 

Thi

 

Hey, man, suicide is a very serious thing, and I think we should all take it seriously. I'm so sorry you're feeling that way. My advice is to talk to someone who cares about you about the way you're feeling. You'll feel more connected to other people, you'll feel like you've taken a weight off your shoulders, and I'm sure you'll feel better in the long run. I really hope you don't harm yourself. If it feels like nothing is helping you get better, try calling the suicide hotline. They are experts on suicide and they will talk to you without insurance and they won't ask you for money. Don't worry, man. You can get through this

 

You're not alone. I've been there myself; a grown man sobbing in my bed at night feeling absolutely ashamed, powerless and meaningless. I still get that way sometimes, especially in long streaks as my brain begins to rewire. Hang in there and accept the burden of your being; accept your sadness and sorrow and treat it as an opportunity to introspect. You're most likely depressed for specific reasons, and knowledge of such reasons could lead to the realization of concrete actions that could be taken to alleviate the problem and potentially transform your life. Nofap is one of those actions, but I don't think it is enough. After many failed streaks, I learned that rebooting for me was not just abstinence from PMO. It entailed a far greater deal of change in my life, change revolving around my attitudes regarding social life, academia, physical and mental health as well as spirituality. I still relapse every now and then but I must say that I've been gradually changing since I started nofap 2 years ago, for the better. Hang in there. Embrace your moments of utter sadness as catalysts for personal development. I'll leave you with a poem from Kahlil Gibran I frequently come back to:


Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding.
Even as the stone of the fruit must break, that its heart may stand in the sun, so must you know pain.
And could you keep your heart in wonder at the daily miracles of your life, your pain would not seem less wondrous than your joy;
And you would accept the seasons of your heart, even as you have always accepted the seasons that pass over your fields.
And you would watch with serenity through the winters of your grief.

Much of your pain is self-chosen.
It is the bitter potion by which the physician within you heals your sick self.
Therefore trust the physician, and drink his remedy in silence and tranquillity:
For his hand, though heavy and hard, is guided by the tender hand of the Unseen,
And the cup he brings, though it burn your lips, has been fashioned of the clay which the Potter has moistened with His own sacred tears.

 

I've been there @Ouch - it's a terrible feeling, but remember, you are NOT alone. You can and will overcome this. You need to find the source of your addiction, which is why we are all here. It's a terrible cycle to be stuck in, but remember, it is only temporary. We are here for you, and any questions you have we can help answer. Do not let this control you because your life is precious.

 

You always knew porn does this things to you and even after this you still watch? If this came to your mind, then you should really stop, and you realized that, so, man... cut it out.

 

Hey man, its ok to not be perfect. please know that you CAN get through this. We may not understand exactly what your going through but we do understand how much of an emotional toll PMO can have. I know its not fun but just hang in there. Its a phase that will pass. I recomend talking to someone like a family member or someone you trust so that you can relieve some stress. We support you and care about you. Hang in there

 

@Ouch

how are you feeling today? As you can tell, there are a lot of us here who know what you're going through and who care about you.

 

Hey man just know we are all here for you and we truly want to help you, please let us know how youre doing and message us message me im here and available to talk about whatever youre feeling.
Pmo puts us in a dark place in our lives and weve all felt worthless because of our horrible habit and its disgusting how an industry can cause

 

how a legal industry can cause so much problems t the entire world.

Uoure not alone i promise and you need to talk to someone you trust. Were all anonymous here and you can trust all of us but i also suggest you talk to someone youlnow personqlly who can hwlp. i promise its gonna release a lot of pain within you and youll start to feel better

 

Yes it is troubling