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Sex scene

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Marco Delpopolo, Mar 26, 2018.

  1. Marco Delpopolo

    Marco Delpopolo Fapstronaut

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    does watching a sex scene in a movie count as a relapse? only boobs were seen, the bottoms half of bodies was not.
     
  2. Gotham Outlaw

    Gotham Outlaw Fapstronaut

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    I wouldn't count it if you didn't fap. Sex scenes in a movie or TV aren't made for fapping. They usually have a narrative purpose.
     
  3. DoctorShultz

    DoctorShultz Fapstronaut

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    I would still stay away if possible, usually, movies will have a rating (R in the case) and it will say something along the lines of mild sex scenes.
     
  4. gunslinger215

    gunslinger215 Fapstronaut

    If you watch a sex scene in a movie, does it trigger dopamine in the brain? I would assume so, since there were naked breasts involved. In that case, I’d stay away from any nudity, regardless of what context it was in
     
    Citadelle likes this.
  5. I'd so no - if it's totally unavoidable then it's not a relapse, UNLESS you acted on it - whether that be overindulging in thoughts, or physically acting on it.

    If you just took it as a part of the movie and forgot about it once it went off the screen then no, it's not a relapse.
     
  6. I agree with @antipornguy. It's really what is going on in your brain when you see nudity. Are you just recognizing it and moving on, or are you storing it for later and getting off to the image? If you are using it to become sexually aroused (at the moment or later on), then that is relapsing. Just seeing it (or just having a sexual/wet dream) are things that you aren't really in control of and so IMHO, no relapse.

    Now, if you go back and watch that scene again intentionally, that's an issue.

    As part of your overall recovery, I don't think you want to go down the road that every pretty girl/nudity scene is taboo and we should avert our eyes. Instead, the goal is to have a healthy outlook of the opposite sex: Appreciating their beauty without staring/objectifying them. You can't remove women from your life. But you can look at them in a purely positive and safe way.
     
    gunslinger215 and Gotham Outlaw like this.
  7. Reverent

    Reverent Fapstronaut

    I think just as seeing a lot of vanilla porn desensitizes us and ascribes us to seek more novelty. So would nonchalantly watching nudity in movies also desensitize us.

    Even if you don't actively act out, I think our brains still are affected by exposure. If nothing else we normalize nudity and think it's not a big deal. Yet in the real world seeing nudity is not a normal thing. Generally we have to be in provacative places or seek it out.

    My good rule of thumb is "would I let my 12 year old see this?" Why not? Is he not mature enough? Would it kickstart curiosity or uncontrollable lust & imagery in his weak mind?...

    But I am the PA.
     
    Last edited: Mar 27, 2018
  8. @Reverent: Interesting approach to this subject and appreciate it. Not trying to be adversarial - just exploring ideas here.

    I think that works for some, but not others. For me personally, I fantasize about women who are completely dressed and are in G-rated situations. Along the lines of your statement, how could I apply the "12 year old" rule? Tell my son not to look at teachers or nurses or secretaries?

    Desensitization for me has come in the form of looking at women in general as body parts. I've been working very hard at seeing them as beautiful human beings instead of objects of (inappropriate) desire. I want to ultimately be healthy enough to view art and the occasional R-rated movie scenes and not be triggered by them.

    This concept I learned from a former pastor who is also an addict. He stated that a current pastor had suggested that he "avert your eyes" to any woman that you found attractive. The former pastor disagreed with the concept. This was going too far in the other direction in his opinion (and mine). Instead, I think there is a place in our hearts, minds, and eyes for general appreciation of the opposite sex. As a PA, I am working hard to get to that place. And in this way, our brains are indeed affected by exposure. But in a positive way.
     
  9. Reverent

    Reverent Fapstronaut

    @BreatheDeeply I don't find your remarks adversarial at all. You bring up some interesting insights and opinions.
    The problem isn't the women clothed or not, it is the fantasizing about them. If you never fantasized about them would it become okay to view them naked? I still maintain it would desensitize us to the natural arousal template innate inside us for intimacy and procreation. It is not normal in modern society for us to be naked.

    No you teach him not to fantasize or objectify women.

    The difference is as functioning people in society we will have to encounter women. They are a necessary blessing that we can not avoid. It behooves us to learn proper healthy respect since there is no way to avoid them.

    However we do NOT have to encounter nudity in film and art etc. We choose these. So for me to say, I want to healthy watch sex scenes is a deception. It may work for some people, but as a known PA I have proven I can't afford that luxury.

    YES you nailed it! There is a place in our hearts and minds to appreciate women. Love kills Porn. There is not a place in our pants however.

    By devine design we are made to be attracted to a partner. Once this relationship is covenanted then it becomes our role to no longer appreciate another woman's body.

    Chastity, Fidelity, Loyalty, Fortitude and Honor.
     
  10. I'm not saying it's good to watch it - in my opinion it's best to stay away from any nudity, so yes I agree with you in that respect... However to answer the OP's question, if you accidentally get exposed to it in this way then it's no big deal providing you do not act up on it (mentally or physically).

    Truth is we're all going to get accidentally exposed to nudity at some point... We're humans, shit happens... Skirts blow up in public, boobs fall out at the gym. The thing is we shouldn't pounce on it like sex crazed maniacs. It's just an embarrassing thing for a lady and that's all we should see it as, an embarrassing blooper...
     
  11. Marco Delpopolo

    Marco Delpopolo Fapstronaut

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    Hi, yes but seeing a women boobs should be natural.... we have just made it this sacret thing in modern society... i go around Running without a shirt, a women should be able too... we sexualise the boobs and nipples on women

    To the other points, thanks for the advice... i think i will count this as a relapse as i knew the movie coming on and i knew what was coming aka the specific scence although i didnt act on it.... the intentiom was there and the thougbts were there. thanks again everyone!!!
     

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