Totally bailed on an opportunity

Bro, I feel your pain. Happens to me all the time. Actually I'm pretty sure what you're describing is the default state for most guys most of the time. You're already ahead of the game by feeling enough regret to take some action (posting here) and wanting to do something more. I think that takes you way out of the wimp category. You're facing up to the fear and that deserves respect.

Get in touch with her. Find her on facebook or text her if you have her number. Tell her you thought you saw her today and wasn't that a coincidence. Find out what's going on with her. Keep it light and don't fret about the outcome. When you talk to her mention a few things you're excited about in your life and let your passion show through.

 

You saw her and whatever emotional attachment you built in the past towards her messed you up and maybe her physical attributes also got you stuck in your head. So instead of interacting with her, you became overly cautious / excessively careful / placed too much importance on the outcome. Which led to procrastination and perfectionism. Which led to the opportunity becoming a bigger deal that it really was.

You were basically afraid of being hurt and imperfect. You shut off any possibility of pain, problems, and negative experiences. Which led to shutting off any possibility of pleasure, solutions, and positive experiences.

The moment you saw her, you were probably looking for the perfect circumstances / moment / method of interacting with her. When all you really need to do was say hi. You didn't have to be smooth and the circumstances didn't have to be ideal. It was messy, awkward, unideal, uncertain, and scary, but you should've done it anyways.

You pretended not to notice her and pretended to not care about her in order to protect your bubble of comfort and certainty. That was more important to you than saying hi to her. More important than letting her (uncertainty) into your cautious world.

 

I hope you really know how sad something like this is.

When people can't even interact with each other anymore out of self protection.

Instead of possibilities, you created distance and silence. Yes, those possibilities had chances of it being a negative experience, but it also had a chance of being positive. That's what a risk is. That's what progress is. That's what living is.

 

When you say "You kinda suck at Talking to girls" that is your belief...it is a limiting belief... you can change your belief by practice. Make an effort to talk to all people the same...and practice that...at the check out lines/ at school/ gym wherever you go. Don't treat woman you are attracted to differently.

 

Exactly women even the most attractive one is a person just like you are. I know I’m female. Don’t put us up on a pedastool as if we are somehow higher than you. We get nervous around guys we find attractive we get rejected we get hurt. Just practice talking to women with no intention other than getting to know her. And if she shoots you down oh well. Try someone else. Don’t let your self esteem rise and fall on the rejection of others.

 

Well said , especially "Don’t let your self esteem rise and fall on the rejection of others." Ya gotta believe in yourself first before others will believe in you.