Video game NSFW content in the way of rebooting?

So about 5 months ago I found out that my boyfriend is addicted to porn and it almost lead to the end of our relationship, but he is determined to fight his addiction for us. He used to download all kinds of pictures on his phone to his 'fap folder' on a daily basis which he's completely got rid of now. What I've been noticing about 2 months later that he's started browsing a lot of NSFW/sexy content for video games, especially Fallout 4 mods, like nude skins, skimpy outfits etc. I feel a bit silly asking this, but would that kind of stuff be somehow considered bad for his rebooting process? I know that it's not as real as real women's nude/sexy pictures but maybe he's tricking himself into thinking that because it's not as realistic it's not as bad?

Thanks in advance for any advice!

 

Thanks for your reply! I did have a chat with him about this and his reasoning was that for him, it's just a video game and he doesn't associate it with porn, it would just be something "nice to look at". I can understand that in a way but from his addicted mind's point of view, I'm guessing he wouldn't really differentiate between something as simply visually attractive and something sexually attractive. Long before I knew about his addiction, I tried questioning some of his upvotes on image boards of half naked women or other sexual pictures with cleavages and so on, and he would always try to make me believe that he is able to just "appreciate female beauty" without necessarily seeing anything sexual in it (I am sure that men are able to do this, but if a picture is obviously sexual in nature with certain female body parts being emphasized or (partial)nudity, I found that a bit hard to believe, especially since men by nature/instinct look at the other gender's body more with their private parts than just their eyes) And when I finally stumbled upon his phone's "fap folder" it turned out that exactly those kinds of pictures ended up in there, among other pictures that wouldn't even be considered sexual, like a random girl's Facebook profile pictures that was just a closeup of her face, no nudity, no body shown. So I'm guessing that it all depends on his mindset and how he chooses to look at something.

But how can I know or tell if in his mind he is actually distancing himself from the sexual aspect of a picture/pixels on the screen, which is what the whole addiction is about? Does the fact that a representation of the female body in a video game is not the same as a real woman's picture really matter? Does it matter if a woman's body is drawn, animated or photographed? Or is he (although I know that he isn't masturbating to this stuff, he is simply playing a video game while browsing mods on the side) subconsciously just trying to find another way to feed his addiction?

I also noticed that some of his behavior shows similarities between his behavior when he was regularly looking at porn:
1.) He hasn't done this kind of mod browsing often (maybe 3 times in the past 3 months) but when he did, he did it privately and without me being aware of it/being around
2.) When I saw by coincidence that he had skimpy outfit mods and pinup picture mods in his game, he told me that these mods came with a package, as if to say that he didn't intentionally look for these mods. However I could see by his browsing history (we openly use the same PC) that he actively searched out and browsed the NSFW section of mods
3.) He gave me a really irrational answer when I expressed my doubts with this kind of stuff, saying that "he doesn't want to censor himself when gaming" eventhough HE is adding these things to the game actively, which is not the same as some kind of nudity being in the game already

Now I'm not sure if I'm just ridiculously obsessing about a silly video game, or if there is some connection to the addiction issue. Sorry, I know this was a long post, but if maybe a guy could give me some insight on some of my questions/thoughts, I would appreciate it!

 

Thanks for both of your replies, I appreciate any insight on this. At the end of the day, the problem is that I can't see inside his head and I can't know what exactly he feels or thinks when he's browsing and installing that kind of sexual content. All I know is that he hasn't (although of course I don't know exactly what he does in private) done this a lot and he has never acted on it or let it escalate to more, so I'm not sure what to conclude from this, maybe he is actually able to control himself when he just has the intention to play a video game with some additional eye candy. I don't know...

 

Well it turns out now (like said, I am able to use his computer freely, as he can use mine) that he has a 100+ screenshot collection of female NPCs'/companions' cleavages and asses that he's 'enhanced' with sexy mods. I think this definitely falls into the category of him mimicking his porn addiction behavior. He also has pin up pictures decoration mods and some kind of sex mod that includes porn moaning sounds. The browsing alone of these mods must offer so many artificial stimuli, and although I know that he's probably not looking at 'real' porn outside of this, let alone masturbating to it, this has to be in some way reinforcing part of his addictive behavior/conditioning of his brain to search out artificial sexual stimuli. I never really knew how exactly to classify his addiction, as he wasn't so much addicted to compulsively masturbate to porn, choosing every possible opportunity to do so, but rather spending a lot of time on searching out and downloading anything potentially sexually stimulating, to - whenever he would feel private enough to do so - masturbate to it. Now I'm not sure if he actually believes what he's doing is harmless or if he's in a way lying to himself by telling himself that a video game is not the same as porn. I just don't know how I can convince him or open his eyes, or if there is even any point to do so..

 

Thanks for your advice. I confronted him about this and he has agreed to delete those mods, seeing how it can be damaging for his reboot. However, he insisted that when he has beat the addiction, he would never want to limit himself by not putting those kinds of mods into the game. When I asked him what is the point of doing that he argued what is the point of art, it's simply nice to look at. I would still think the point of a sexualized woman is to be sexually stimulating, even if it happens to be visually stimulating as well, and that there should be a specific time and place to want to look at something like that, meaning for sexual arousal. I can understand if a movie or game has nudity or sexual content that for a guy it's something nice to see on the side, but to actively search these things out of context (meaning outside of wanting to be sexually stimulated) doesn't seem normal to me. But maybe as a woman I'm just not able to understand how a man thinks. Is it really normal for a guy, addiction or not, to obsess about putting big tits and asses into a video game to make it more pleasing to the eye?

Either way, I feel like he hasn't really reached that point in his mind where he sees something wrong with his behavior and wants to change something about it. I've recommended and linked him this nofap forum a few times and given all kinds of advice, but he seems to want to do it in his own way.

 

I appreciate your kind and encouraging words and I think anyone on and outside of this forum who decides to go through this (I can only imagine since I'm not an addict myself) difficult, scary and lifechanging experience deserves greatest admiration and respect, and all the support that is needed.
So what I take from this is that adding sexual content to a game is in one way or another done with the intention of triggering a sexual response, and him reserving that right for the future is his addiction speaking. I just feel like he is still in some kind of denial about his addiction and I don't think there is much I can do to help that. I actually still feel a bit disturbed by the fact that in a couple of hours of playtime he has collected 150+ screenshots focusing on every cleavage and ass in the game and he doesn't even see anything wrong with it. I thought him having quit "real" porn for a few months now (at least I hope so, he refused to have any porn blocking apps on his phone) would fix this oversexualizing view on everything. But I guess all I can do is be hopeful and patient and as supportive as possible. I just don't want my trust to be further abused either.