90 days complete......Heres what I learned this time 'round.

So this isnt my first Rodeo. I've done a few 90 days+(hard mode) my first being in 2015. Before that I wouldnt have believed it possible to go without at least Masturbating for even 7 days. But back then I knew it was something I had to try and that was before Id even read up about the detrimental effects on the brain. It was one of those things you can have an intuition about, even though the whole world seems to be saying its ok, even healthy. And I think thats the problem most people encounter with this, because its so socially acceptable that you can end up doubting yourself, when things get tough. And I've come to the conclusion that there are many things we are free to do in life, but not all of those things are actually good for us. Most of them actually destroy us from the inside out.
Anyway I decided to do another 90 days because I found old habits starting to sneak back in. Only occasionally, but still it was enough to make me wanna wipe the slate clean once more. Im really glad I did because this thing is always an epic experience that teaches me something new every time. And for whatever reasons, this time round the block was the most epic ever. I'll share what I learned in the hopes that it might be of some use to someone:

- Sugar + PMO =
I know this may seem like its coming out of left field but hear me out........So I've learned to listen to my intuition, that inner guidance we all have, and I've realised its never wrong and always has my best interests at heart. So when I got the intuition to give up sugar I didnt question it and proceeded to create a diet that was free from all processed foods. I didnt really know where it was going, I mean Im not over weight, Im in pretty good shape and healthy so its not like I needed to do it in order to drop a few pounds. But after 7 days I noticed something. Besides the feeling of lightness in my body and feeling more clear headed, I noticed that the urge to PMO had been reduced significantly. Like 60-70%. I know that sounds fantastical but it really made a difference. So in order to test out what I thought had happened I went back on sugar. Guess what? The urge to PMO went right back up. I decided to stay off sugar after that. So you may argue with me and quote facts and figures and all kinds of studies that claim sugar (processed) is completely neutral and doesnt damage your health etc..but what Id urge you to do is to forget about theory and try it for yourself. 30 days no processed foods(because most processed foods contain added sugar). 30 days of natural food, no fizzy drinks, no juices, no alcohol. Just food that has one ingredient and nothing else. I promise you'll feel the difference and this journey you're on, trying to reset your brain will be a whole lot easier.

You'll be tested:

I read a story about when the Buddha attained enlightenment. He sat under the Bodhi tree and was determined not to move until he had gotten what he came for. But shortly after dusk, the chief of all demons, Mara, confronted the Buddha and tried to break his concentration. Guess what the first thing Mara tempted the Buddha with was? Sex. In the form of countless beautiful women. The Buddha being the Alpha male, bad ass that he was, didnt bat and eyelid and eventually Mara had to try other way to distract the Buddha from his mission. All of which failed because the Buddha attained enlightenment. The point of this is that you'll be tested. I swear all of this stuff, freeing myself from PMO has made me believe that there is something else going on in the world. Something we cant see but thats definitely there. I know you more spiritual folks already believe these things but Ive found that the more you free yourself from the distractions and addictions of the world, the more you feel and sense the presence of something benevolent at work. That theres an intelligence at work acting through us, guiding us to freedom. Anyway freedom doesnt come easy, as anyone who has decided they'd like themselves some freedom can attest to. And thats why the Buddha was so strongly tested. In fact if you explore any major religion, they all talk about testing. Jesus himself was led into the wilderness and tested by the devil. You may not buy into religion of any kind, and thats ok, but even if you dont believe in dark forces or forces of good, you will still be tested. And when you are tested its handy to realise, in the moment, that you are in fact in the process of being tested. And when you are aware in the moment you have power because its the lack of awareness that kills persistence and it can all go out the window in a flash. We've all been there, day 45 or something, youre crusing along and then next thing you know you're pants are around your ankles and theres Kleenex scattered all around the bed. So be aware that freedom comes at a cost and something does not want you to be free. But if you keep your awareness about you, you'll be ok.

Dont believe anything your mind tells you:

Your mind is a liar. It will try get its dopamine hit in whatever way it can. It will lie to you and whisper things in your ear in order to get you to break. And those things will sound very reasonable in the moment. But dont buy it. Christians believe its the devil, psychologists believe its the super ego........no matter its name, it will try to sabotage your efforts to break free. And this was the thing that really stood out for me this time round. I could clearly see the things my mind would say to me in order to get me to break. Things like: If you go too long without MO your plumbing will stop working. If you dont MO you'll lose your sex drive and it will never come back.......and when I didnt respond to these it upped its game......You'll die alone. You'll go so long without sex that it will be too late. You'll never have sex again.......and on and on it went. But it was just like Mara, throwing what it can at me until I broke. But I didnt and then the flatline came. Which lasted 10 days or so. And during the flatline my mind came at me again with things like, see you;ve broken your sex drive and it will never come back.
But it did come back and thats the point here, that no matter what your mind is whispering to you and no matter what goes on during the flatline, keep the faith, you'll be ok. You'll be better than ok, you'll be the best ever.

Go after your dreams

I noticed that when I was living a life that wasnt mine, I would try to compensate with sex. The more dissatisfied with my own life I became the more I craved sex and PMO. But when I turned things around and started to move towards the life I actually wanted to create for myself, the less I felt that craving. I think people become obsessed with sex and PMO because they arent living the life they really want. Like sex is something you tag onto your life because you dont love the job you go to every day. Its not what you actually wanna do with your life its just something that pays the bills. I dont think you can get away from your calling. If you ignore it, it will fester and manifest itself in the form of dissatisfaction and a feeling of emptiness which people try to fill with sex, food, drugs, alcohol etc. So I know it may seem unrelated to freeing yourself from PMO, but if you are working a job you dont love and not really living the life you want, then its worth looking at. I think you'll find that if you start to move towards who you really are, that the urge to act out goes down significantly.

Keep trying:
No matter how many times you get knocked down, get right back on the horse. I know its a cliche but its true. I failed a lot of times before I cracked it. At one stage I couldnt even get a day. I think as people we have a tenancy to be all or nothing in our approach to things. But every day counts. Every attempt counts and I promise if you stick with it you'll crack it wide open. But you'll never get there if you give up and rationalise giving up. Ive seen that happen, people justifying bowing out of the game. Dont do that. Dont allow negativity to consume you and beat you. Dont fall into the trap of thinking that you'll be like this forever. You wont. But only if you keep going. So get back up and go again, no matter what.


Your will heal your whole being:
All your porn memories will fade at some point. Again I know some people will argue with me and demand I present them with data to back up this claim. I cant give you data, but I can give you a promise that if you stick with this, those memories will slip out of your being and slide back into the abyss where they belong. But its a choice. You can either re-inforce those memories by engaging with them or you can turn away from them every time they present themselves at the gates to your mind. And the more you turn away from them the more faint they become. And then something else happens.........you start to see women differently. Its no longer just a physical thing, you start to get a sense of the whole person. Like her life force becomes the most attractive thing about her. The super powers are real, but after a while they get boring because you evolve and move to another level where it becomes about something else. And you realise that you have gone from the most fucked up depraved shit imaginable to something else. Something more profound and healing. Its love really. And thats what all of this was about the whole time, the journey from a dark place to a place of love. And when that happens your super powers become something else entirely, because women sense it from you, trust me its like a nuclear beacon over your head. The guy whos capable of real love and seeing women for who they actually are is the most desirable guy in the room.

Anyway thats what I've learned, I hope its of some use. Peace out amigos, keep at it and dont give up.

 

Thanks guys means a lot to me that what I said resonated with you. Sometimes it can feel like you are the only person in the world whos on this mission. And I believe it is a mission, not just something you casually do. I was out with some friends a while back and the subject came up(somehow?). The other guys couldnt get their head around not MO'ing. One guy even said he couldnt live without it. I tried to convince them to try it, even for 2 weeks but, no, they couldnt see any reason why. Anyway what Im trying to say is I appreciate you guys and wish you all the best with your own missions.

 

Man this is the key to it all. No matter how many times you fall, get back up and go again. Thats how winning is done. If you study the people who've ever achieved anything their pasts are littered with failures and usually success comes when they were at the point of giving up. So keep pushing ahead you a closer to success than you might think.

 

Yep sure did. But then I figured out that the answer was not to try and control it nor was it to act out. The answer is to allow it. Theres a book called the way of the superior man by David Diea which talks about this. Think of a woman such that shes loaded with sexual energy and so when you see her and you feel that arousal, dont try to control it or get away from it, let her sexual energy feed you. Like feel it in your body. I think a lot of people who are addicted to fapping have regulation issues, in that when their nervous system is activated they dont know how to soothe themsleves naturally without the use of something like fapping or drinking or whatever. So when you feel your system being activated by a beautiful woman, stop and allow the feelings to be. Let them flow through your body and breathe. That way you feed off the girls sexual energy and so you win either way.