Is being attracted to teenage girls a result of PMO or is it human nature??

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by MasterRoshi, May 19, 2018.

  1. Your profile says you're 117, so maybe you are right. ;)
     
  2. I think its important to realise that if you are going down the road of using teenagers as an object of your fantasies then it's very possible that because of that pre-ocupation when using porn and visiting those kind of sites it does open up other possibilities, things which you may not have considered such as nonude content, candid content where you stray from the heavily produced commercially available stuff to the more amateur content, and it's that realm where you may stumble accross images or sites which show people far younger than the 'barely legal' category. That's a process i went through later on in my porn viewing days and i ended up with a criminal record.

    This is why its important for people to understand the role that pornography plays in their life and assess themselves as individuals by taking away the porn and looking at what they realy want to achieve with regards to sex and intimacy, so much porn is warped and deeply patriarchal, masochistic and violent. I know of a few people like me who ventured into the murky and dark underbelly of illegal content after being focused for years on regular porn, yet if you told me when i was 21 that i would end up looking at illegal content i would have ripped your head off.

    I'm not talking about people who outwardly condone such material or even promote it, those people in my opinion are unchangeable or deeply entrenched and are probably true paedophiles, the other side of the spectrum is those who got to this point as a process of desensitisation, always feeling they needed to ratchet up the risk vs reward. Part of it is the taboo factor the novelty factor and also the ease of access and the anonymity and an element of the anxiety and fear which become a toxic mix. Most are porn addicts with the same problems we have but the material is more on the extreme end and many still view vanilla adult content alongside the other stuff, i think that's a key part of identifying if it's a behavioural problem or something more severe like a sexual orientation manifested from birth.

    Here's some facts about paedophiles which although i realise is a rather unsavoury topic it's something i have gone to some length in order to try and understand

    1) They are more likely to be left handed
    2) More likely to have webbed feet and hands
    3) A large percentage have experienced childhood trauma (although important to note not everyone who experiences childhood trauma goes on to break the law)
    4) They spend a lot of time around younger people and maybe even actively choose professions that put them in regular contact with minors
    5) Tend to be shorter in stature than the average person
    6) It is believed that as much as 1% of the adult population in the UK has a primary or exclusive attraction only to minors, that equates to roughly 6 million people
    7) There are also female paedophiles and it's not an exclusively male attribute, although it's relatively uncommon
    8) Not all of them are offenders and not all offenders are paedophiles
    9) They spend a lot of time in fantasy, writing stories and erotica related to their orientation and may have an unhealthy and obsessive interest in childhood paraphenalia
    10) Often only get support from other paedophiles and regularly network with them, to this end many are encouraged to commit offences, whereas if they had been able to reach out to a more socially acceptable and helpful organisation. would instead be encouraged to desist and manage their behaviour so as not to commit an offence.

    If anyone reading this feels like they might have a problem in the more severe end then I would suggest contacting the following people who can help

    UK
    The Lucy Faithful Foundation or Stop it now on 0808 100 0900
    website www.stopitnow.org.uk

    STOPSO (The Specialist Treatment Organisation for Perpetrators and Survivors of Sexual Offences)
    website www.stopso.org.uk

    USA
    Stop it now 1.888.PREVENT
    Website www.stopitnow.org
     
  3. Thanks for the heads up, @thorswrath32 - good to know some of the traps that can transition one unknowingly into the dark stuff.
     
    A new day and MasterRoshi like this.
  4. Rehab101

    Rehab101 Fapstronaut

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    I personally have trouble getting over the fact I never got to meet hot college girls back in college. I am not into teens but into well developed college girls in young 20s. It doesn't help that I am with my current girlfriend who is my only first sexual experience. I kept thinking what it feels like to meet and to sleep with a college girl. I can blame pmo content. I would also like to get rid of such annoying thoughts in my head. I am 29.
     
  5. AsharKiller

    AsharKiller Fapstronaut

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    Bro ! You need to redefine what you are saying. You need to ask yourself why you are attracted to teenage girls. Is because they resemble more to P stars. They are slim and tall and dress tight so your brain creates glimpses from P clips and then confuses you to rethink and then fooled to find them attractive. Belief on attractive towards opposite sex varies from religion to religion. But in my case it is not normal but a bad thing to be attracted towards females .By not engaging any religion personally i believe We have a self respect . We are not kids anymore i.e by seeing attractive things and then opening our mouths so that saliva falls you see kid thinking. Brother i would advice to lower your gaze. I know it will be like i want to observe what i am doing i want to see but you don't have to . It will be a good practice to avoid PMO as avoiding lusting and observing teenage girls. Stay safe brother
     
    Immature likes this.
  6. Headspace

    Headspace Fapstronaut

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    They might look similar at first glimpse, but when you see them acting you will notice the difference. I experienced myself that an attractive looking teenager can quickly become unattractive once you notice she's still stuck in puberty. As for me, I am 28 now, and I already lose interest in women around 20 once I learn they're in an age where you still get drunk and dance to painfully loud music every second weekend (as many of them).

    Other than that, being "obsessed" can quickly become problematic. On the other hand, I don't see a problem with being attracted to women who are many years younger than you as long as you feel attracted to same age or older women as well - so you can know it's the person you love, not her age. In case you start a long-term relationship, the person will stay, but the age will pass. Loving her because she is a teenager sounds pathologic to me.

    As for me, I notice that age plays less and less of a role the older I get. Being 28 right now, I've been interested in women from 6 years younger to 6 years older than me. I can also imagine that biologically men are desinged to like younger women, because girls develop quicker than boys, both physically and mentally. In the end, the age seperation in school and sports and so on, where only people of the same age are together, is unnatural (in the sense that this wasn't the case in stone-age communities). This goes beyond sexual love and attraction. The younger can always learn from the older, and the older can receive fresh new input and energy from the younger. Instead, each young generation is being isolated nowadays.
     
    Immature and thorswrath32 like this.
  7. Actually, I think we are attracted to porn stars because they look like teenage girls.
    Yes, even though they are attractive, we must refrain from staring or gawking or ogling. Those are not good for them,or for us.
     
    Last edited: May 24, 2018
    Deleted Account likes this.
  8. There is an old rule of thumb: don't go younger than half your age plus 7. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Age_d...tionships#The_"half-your-age-plus-seven"_rule

    An interesting observation!
     
    Headspace likes this.
  9. Headspace

    Headspace Fapstronaut

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  10. Horenuker

    Horenuker Fapstronaut

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  11. The key is acceptance.
    Just accept that you find some people attractive, because some are.

    It is the resistance of this fact that is causing you your anxiety, you resist which makes it feel "wrong", which makes it exiting, which makes you fantasize etc... If you just acknowledge to yourself that, "yeah, that girl is very attractive" and move on without resisting the thought you'll find that it just goes, your mind will move on to the next thing to observe.
     
    thorswrath32 likes this.
  12. I don't think we need another feminist thread here since it's been debated to death on this forum. Although I'm glad you said what you said since what @Immature said shouldn't have been left unchallenged.

    I think porn does encourage an attraction to teens. I remember when I first started looking at porn I didn't get porn with teens in it but I eventually started to look at some of it and that led to me finding teens (after pubescent) attractive. But I didn't start looking at porn hoping to find such a thing. But I wouldn't get involved with a teen (underage or not) because while girls can get mature quicker than boys many teenage girls can be silly.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: May 28, 2018
  13. Horenuker

    Horenuker Fapstronaut

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    I enjoy how many times a comment has been made signally an attraction to a teen or an acknowledgement that they are beautiful followed by disclosures to all that they are Legal Teens!! Come on please! No teen is going down the street flashing their ID so that men have a green light on if they can be attracted to them. It is NOT illegal to find a female of any age attractive! It is what actions U take as an adult because of that attraction. Admiring beauty doesn’t lead to throwing beauty in ur trunk and driving away with it!!!
     
    Immature and Brooklyn Jerry 70 like this.

  14. I agree,
    most western society believes that up until the stroke of midnight of their 18th birthday people are un-developed and childlike. Then as soon as that clock goes past 12 then, boom! they suddenly develop mature features. It is ridiculous.

    I used to get very anxious if I caught myself noticing some developed features on a girl to then realize that she look a little too young. It is perfectly normal to recognize beauty, regardless of age.

    I would like to also point out that physical attraction is a very small part of romantic arrtaction. There are girls I've met who, at first I wasn't really attracted to, but once I got to know them and their personality the feelings of attraction grew into something more, something way beyond the "oh shit, she's hot" feeling.
     
  15. MasterRoshi

    MasterRoshi Fapstronaut

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    Dude really good point about the emotional attraction!

    To be honest I’ve been so focused on sex for so long that I forgot that this existed! I remember being in highschool and on day one noticing who was hot in my class. Then 2 months later the hot ones were still hot, some of them who had horrid personalities became less hot, or more of an object. But some of the ones I didn’t notice on day one became attractive to me once I got to know them!

    This is exactly what this post was about. It was me trying to find the true healthy balance of sexual desire, emotional desire and finding someone attractive to the correct degree instead of sexual obsession.

    Thanks for your post!
     
    Brooklyn Jerry 70 likes this.

  16. I missed this message and would like to express my experience with POCD, so sorry for the lack of consistency.

    My POCD grew from believing the it is wrong to find anyone under 18 attractive, something that was drilled into me through the media and society.
    I resisted any attraction but, as we know, resisting only adds a layer of taboo which makes it even more exiting. I'd then go into a spiral of anxiety, checking and reassurance.

    Eventually I came to understand that society is locked into a bit of an echo chamber with itself. A few decades ago the acceptance that attractiveness develops over time (not all at once,) was commonplace. Now, however, people are so afraid of being labeled a pedophile that they'll go to great lengths to cognitively distance themselves away from anything that may even slightly elude to the fact, to the point where they take up a strong mental defence against any thoughts that may make them uncomfortable.

    Once I was able to be comfortable with the fact that I sometimes find some teens attractive and the beauty isn't always a sexual attraction my anxiety faded, sometimes it flares up but I can quickly remind myself of the truths.
     
    horny nerd and Immature like this.
  17. sexkiev

    sexkiev Banned

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    In Ancient Greece, Ancient Egypt, the girls after the first menstruation were considered adults and could be given into wives of an adult man.
     
  18. WasZeusWrong?

    WasZeusWrong? Fapstronaut

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    My one and a half cents on this topic: Sometimes it helps me just to *observe* my thoughts, almost as if I were watching someone else having them. For example, I think about some porn images I've seen and then I feel the urge to PMO. But sometimes I can kinda laugh at myself (or at the guy having those thoughts!), which tends to weaken the urges. As dreams show us, we don't always have control over our thoughts. When you wake up from a dream, you might try to remember it, then think WTF? Weird!, and then move on with your day. I think maybe destructive daytime thoughts can be the same. We "see" them, the same way we do in remembering a dream, and we might reflect on it briefly, but then we move on. Then again, i know all too well what it's like to have obsessive thoughts, things that just won't quit, and that sucks. I'll be working on that the rest of my life!
     
  19. AUTiger7222

    AUTiger7222 Fapstronaut



    They definitely do mature at a much younger ages these days. I think that has to do with the hormones that they put in food these days that artificially accelerates kids to mature faster. I'm only 31 and I see some of these 10-13 year old girls that look 20 and I'm blown away because they didn't look like that when I was that age. I think one of the reasons you're seeing the movement towards hormone free food, especially meats, is because they realize the negative effect it's happening on today's youth.
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  20. axiba1220

    axiba1220 Fapstronaut

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    Seems not that good for your description
     

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