I am new to Nofap

Great job Hector! Welcome to nofap. Yeah I also did PMO and missed the chance to bond with girls in MS/HS (when I was in MS/HS). I can't go back and regain that time. But i found there were more issues as to why I didn't bond that were deeper than the addiction which is what I'm also trying to address as I stay clean. Some kids probably did PMO to some extent and still bonded with girls so it wasn't the only thing, there was more in my equation which made me totally not bond. And now I'm 28 and a long ways to go until I'm ready for a girlfriend.

 

Yeah you too! I believe that staying clean (not using PMO) is step one. Then theres a chance for all those other issues to come up. Such as fears. I learned that issues with childhood abandonment and rejection are huge. If you look up the ACA Laundry List and Other Laundry List (all 4 sides) that's exactly the traits I had which made it hard to relate to others. So I've been using the ACA program to help me with those issues in relating to others while using nofap to help me keep the goal of staying clean.

 

Hi @Hromo95! It's great you found this place. I tried to quit before, many times, without a community and failed miserably. This time it's different.

I relate to your story man. I also started when I was 13, I also fapped instead of making connections. But there's nothing about PMO that you cannot control - everything is within you reach. And we'll be here for you so you don't forget it. I keep my fingers crossed for you man!

 

Hi. Welcome to forum!

Make sure you crate a personal journal thread in Reboot Logs section and blog there on a regular basis. As well as just generally be active participant in various forum discussions. I recommend this to everybody new here because it's the major thing that helped me when I was first starting. Just lurking on forums, reading and learning is great. But it usually is so much more powerful to engage. It helps to keep us motivated and accountable when we are active part of community. And keeps this in front of our minds so we don't forget about importance of it and slip away in our old habits. Sharing is also therapeutic. This is a major reason why AA meetings work so good. But that was developed before internet era. These days we can get most of the same benefits online through communities like this. So don't underestimate the power of active participation.

I would also like to suggest you to look into mindfulness meditation. It has helped me personally tremendously to learn how to deal with urges. It takes a while to get good at it and notice results, so you need to be consistent with it, but once you do it's very powerful. It has been used by sages for thousands of years to deal with various issues of the mind. And in recent decades the science is also catching up to what ancient sages have know for centuries. Meditation these days are widely used as very effective tool by psychologists for treating addiction and by neurologists for supporting recovery of the brain. It is a great exercise for the brain the same way as jogging is great exercise for the body. Check out this Ted talk, it gives a good idea of what's it about when it comes to philosophy. As far as practical side of it there is this awesome smartphone app called Headspace for guided meditations to get you started.

Wish you lot's of strength and success in your reboot journey!