Thank you for welcoming broken people.

9thTimesTheCharm · Jun 9, 2018

Hi everyone who takes the time to read this. The story of this 31 year old male is rather bleak and as the nickname suggests. I've had porn and sexual distortions in my life since I was 10 and have tried seriously a total of 9 times to kick it through my teenage and adult life this being the 9th.

I'm going to be including a lot of stuff from the past in my journal which may provoke Psub literature stories so I recommend females and homosexual males don't read my day 1 journal. I've decided to quit (again) as none of my other attempts made it past 2 months. The relationship I was in suffered and I believe there is PIED and PIDE from death grip and novelty.

My parameters are PMO and even bouncing my eyes from attractive women through the course of my day. Pure cold turkey and cleansing of my system. I have already been suffering from fear of life becoming depressingly dull and unenjoyable from lack of orgasm but also recognise that once I'm rebooted and conducting myself properly within the confines of a proper loving and nurturing relationship that has lead to marriage, I will feel pleasure and connection like nothing I can dream of or imagine.

After a couple of days of failure/denial of wanting to do it. I started after my last session yesterday. so 930 pm tonight will be my 1 day clean.

I will be journaling daily for 90 days with a big past experiences and life story speal to get all potential triggers and emotions out in the open to begin healing and restoration. I will be trying to provide scales in terms of temptations and feelings of pain during my struggle as well as associated potential reasons for this.

Thanks again for reading and I wish you all the best of willpower to reclaim your masculinity (femininity) and sexuality back to normal and realistic dimensions.

Moon Shot · Jun 9, 2018

9thTimesTheCharm said: ↑

Hi everyone who takes the time to read this. The story of this 31 year old male is rather bleak and as the nickname suggests. I've had porn and sexual distortions in my life since I was 10 and have tried seriously a total of 9 times to kick it through my teenage and adult life this being the 9th.

I'm going to be including a lot of stuff from the past in my journal which may provoke Psub literature stories so I recommend females and homosexual males don't read my day 1 journal. I've decided to quit (again) as none of my other attempts made it past 2 months. The relationship I was in suffered and I believe there is PIED and PIDE from death grip and novelty.

My parameters are PMO and even bouncing my eyes from attractive women through the course of my day. Pure cold turkey and cleansing of my system. I have already been suffering from fear of life becoming depressingly dull and unenjoyable from lack of orgasm but also recognise that once I'm rebooted and conducting myself properly within the confines of a proper loving and nurturing relationship that has lead to marriage, I will feel pleasure and connection like nothing I can dream of or imagine.

After a couple of days of failure/denial of wanting to do it. I started after my last session yesterday. so 930 pm tonight will be my 1 day clean.

I will be journaling daily for 90 days with a big past experiences and life story speal to get all potential triggers and emotions out in the open to begin healing and restoration. I will be trying to provide scales in terms of temptations and feelings of pain during my struggle as well as associated potential reasons for this.

Thanks again for reading and I wish you all the best of willpower to reclaim your masculinity (femininity) and sexuality back to normal and realistic dimensions.
Click to expand...

I'm glad you started a journal. You may also try cold showers and reading the success forums when urges are closing to peaking.

I wish you all the success in my power to wish you and take care, my fapstronaut.

This battle is a long and tough one, but the reward is just as proportionally grand.

Deleted Account · Jun 9, 2018

9thTimesTheCharm said: ↑

Hi everyone who takes the time to read this. The story of this 31 year old male is rather bleak and as the nickname suggests. I've had porn and sexual distortions in my life since I was 10 and have tried seriously a total of 9 times to kick it through my teenage and adult life this being the 9th.

I'm going to be including a lot of stuff from the past in my journal which may provoke Psub literature stories so I recommend females and homosexual males don't read my day 1 journal. I've decided to quit (again) as none of my other attempts made it past 2 months. The relationship I was in suffered and I believe there is PIED and PIDE from death grip and novelty.

My parameters are PMO and even bouncing my eyes from attractive women through the course of my day. Pure cold turkey and cleansing of my system. I have already been suffering from fear of life becoming depressingly dull and unenjoyable from lack of orgasm but also recognise that once I'm rebooted and conducting myself properly within the confines of a proper loving and nurturing relationship that has lead to marriage, I will feel pleasure and connection like nothing I can dream of or imagine.

After a couple of days of failure/denial of wanting to do it. I started after my last session yesterday. so 930 pm tonight will be my 1 day clean.

I will be journaling daily for 90 days with a big past experiences and life story speal to get all potential triggers and emotions out in the open to begin healing and restoration. I will be trying to provide scales in terms of temptations and feelings of pain during my struggle as well as associated potential reasons for this.

Thanks again for reading and I wish you all the best of willpower to reclaim your masculinity (femininity) and sexuality back to normal and realistic dimensions.
Click to expand...

Hi. Welcome to forum!

Awesome to hear that you have realized the importance of and started journal. It would be great as well to just generally be active participant in various forum discussions. I recommend these two things to everybody new here because it's the major thing that helped me when I was first starting. Just lurking on forums, reading and learning is great. But it usually is so much more powerful to engage. It helps to keep us motivated and accountable when we are active part of community. And keeps this in front of our minds so we don't forget about importance of it and slip away in our old habits. Sharing is also therapeutic. This is a major reason why AA meetings work so good. But that was developed before internet era. These days we can get most of the same benefits online through communities like this. So don't underestimate the power of active participation.

I would also like to suggest you to look into mindfulness meditation. It has helped me personally tremendously to learn how to deal with urges and triggers. It takes a while to get good at it and notice results, so you need to be consistent with it, but once you do it's very powerful. It has been used by sages for thousands of years to deal with various issues of the mind. And in recent decades the science is also catching up to what ancient sages have know for centuries. Meditation these days are widely used as very effective tool by psychologists for treating addiction and by neurologists for supporting recovery of the brain. It is a great exercise for the brain the same way as jogging is great exercise for the body. Check out this Ted talk, it gives a good idea of what's it about when it comes to philosophy. As far as practical side of it there is this awesome smartphone app called Headspace for guided meditations to get you started.

Wish you lot's of strength and success in your reboot journey!

9thTimesTheCharm · Jun 9, 2018

The Serpent of Fire said: ↑

Hi. Welcome to forum!

Awesome to hear that you have realized the importance of and started journal. It would be great as well to just generally be active participant in various forum discussions. I recommend these two things to everybody new here because it's the major thing that helped me when I was first starting. Just lurking on forums, reading and learning is great. But it usually is so much more powerful to engage. It helps to keep us motivated and accountable when we are active part of community. And keeps this in front of our minds so we don't forget about importance of it and slip away in our old habits. Sharing is also therapeutic. This is a major reason why AA meetings work so good. But that was developed before internet era. These days we can get most of the same benefits online through communities like this. So don't underestimate the power of active participation.

I would also like to suggest you to look into mindfulness meditation. It has helped me personally tremendously to learn how to deal with urges and triggers. It takes a while to get good at it and notice results, so you need to be consistent with it, but once you do it's very powerful. It has been used by sages for thousands of years to deal with various issues of the mind. And in recent decades the science is also catching up to what ancient sages have know for centuries. Meditation these days are widely used as very effective tool by psychologists for treating addiction and by neurologists for supporting recovery of the brain. It is a great exercise for the brain the same way as jogging is great exercise for the body. Check out this Ted talk, it gives a good idea of what's it about when it comes to philosophy. As far as practical side of it there is this awesome smartphone app called Headspace for guided meditations to get you started.

Wish you lot's of strength and success in your reboot journey!
Click to expand...

I actually have the app already and was using it for a while but didn't notice many changes...probably due to not trying to change anything so now it might really come in handy. Thanks for the encouragement and I'll look around and post around as helpfully as I can.

Log in

Thank you for welcoming broken people.

9thTimesTheCharm Fapstronaut

Moon Shot Fapstronaut

Deleted Account Guest

9thTimesTheCharm Fapstronaut

Share This Page