Is it true that even average to below average women won't settle for any guy other than Chad?

Anecdotal. We all have our own preferences.

 

Even if we’re just “below average.”

 

If you want hold yourself to others standards instead of your own then you will be miserable. I’ve learned that comparison is the theft of joy and on the surface you may think others have it easier than you but it’s not true because if you knew the person for who they really were then you would cont your blessings and glad you are not them. I’m not tall nor I’m the stereotypical blue eyed blonde hair handsome guy that is the beauty of standard that Hollywood portrays but that doesn’t make me non desirable to a woman I find attractive. You don’t need to act or look perfect to find love but you do need to have self worth does having women chasing you constantly give you any value you in your life probably not it’s all seeking validation from others which is never a good base for happiness

 

Ummm whose Chad so I can tell you if he’s hot?

 

It is really far away from reality to believe that appearance is the only attractive thing in a person.

 

I agree but I presume Chad has it all lol. And as far as attraction it’s generally a bit different between the genders. While all men have their types, in general they can look at the same woman and say she’s hot or she’s a 10, but women don’t really do that with men or other women for that matter. Myself and my three friends can look at the same guy and One thinks he’s attractive the other two are repulsed! And they say on a first date men decide if they will sleep with you but women decide if they won’t. What I mean is that women don’t have the same immediate sexual desires as men. If we are not repulsed and we like talking with you we will go to date 2 and our attraction grows from there or does not. Some of the best relationships I have had were with men whom I was not immediately attracted to. Because in relationships while attraction and chemistry are important compatibility is much more.

I think even by classifying women as average or below average looking you could be missing out on a great relationship. Would you rather have a 9 or 10 in looks with a 1 one on compatibility or the reverse? I think often porn tells you that a 9/10 on looks is what you need but that’s not a good plan. And it is so very rare to find a 9 or 10 on both so you have to compromise somewhere. Love should not feel like butterflies, it should feel like putting on a comfy pair of pants that you’ve owned for years. If one seeks the butterfly high they will never be happy for too long. In online dating what i saw was 90% of the men emailing 10% of the women the most attractive who were bombarded with emails they could not find possibly respond to and most so far from what the women were seeking (never read the profile) and completely ignoring the average looking women who rarely received much correspondence and then the men complained that no one ever responded to them and the “hot” women were ignoring them because they were short or bald . In other words how dare women judge them by their looks?! The irony!

 

@GG2002 I agree with you in a lot of what you said. Some man are chasing only the 8, 9 or 10. They're missing a lot... While I was single, I have met, mostly, average looking girls. And we had a lot of fun... and had plenty of sex. Guys and girls who care too much for the apearance are missing many interesting experiences and oportunities, indeed.

 

Look, a beautiful woman to me might not be a beautiful woman to another man. The majority of time it's not. Beauty is very, very subjective. It's in the eyes of the beholder.

But what matters to me is if I find a girl atractive I don't care about the opinion of others. I'll try to know her. Some men ask me opinion about a woman they find atractive and when I say my opinion (nothing offensive. I just prefer other ones) they tend to feel offended. Are they looking for some sort of validation for fuc*'s sake?!

There are no "standardized" 8, 9 or 10's. Everybody has its own preferences. And that's cool.

 

Two options =

1) Act the way you think other people will like you for in order to be liked by many for somebody that you aren't. Throughout your whole relationship with these people you'll have to continually convince them to be interested in you. You have to hide and be cautious about everything you do or say so that none of them can ever find out who you really are. You constantly worry about saying or doing the "wrong" things and losing these relationships. You seek to control the situations and people around you in a paranoid and lacking way.

2) Express yourself honestly. Find out who you really are and what you really like. Do and say what you want. Not everyone will like you, but you'll resonate with the right people. People that you don't have to convince to be with you. You'll get rejected more, but the faster you get rejected the sooner you can move on to find people who wants to be around the real you. You enjoy who you are and the life that you're living and it's up to others whether or not they want to join you.

Even if your theory is true that most women want Chad, why would you want most women? Seems like a very unoriginal and boring life to copy somebody for the sake of getting unoriginal and boring women. It's like working your whole life to achieve a high paying career that you hate so you can buy a luxury car that you don't care about for the sake of attracting women that want those things.

There's many different types of people in the world. Don't live in generalizations of "all women like this or that". Stop the researching and go meet real people.

Chad's just doing his thing and some women like that. Just as you should be doing your thing and finding people that resonate with that.

 

Yes.... if you are looking to date on line. Basically, on-line is like a supermarket. A woman [who is often self-centered and narcissistic] will go shopping through hundreds of profiles...as she would browse between various brands of toothpaste on the shelf.

No... if you get your act together, are a decent enough guy, and meet women in the normal course of life. You will be ready to respond to those coy little flirtatious signals they give off. And you will screen out the 'hottie' [who wants drama] for a more average girl... who has some personality and character... and is therefore attractive.

 

Yeah, who's Chad?

 

Except that this is another generalization about female behavior that is tending on the side of condemnation, as though there aren’t male counterparts who do the exact same thing all over the Internet.

There’s also a trend on this thread that being average is some kind of heinously undesirable thing that is a societal hindrance and leaves those of us, men and women, who can be described as such to the wayside, scraps left behind for the picking of scavengers. It’s not a great feeling and it’s not great rhetoric and it’s part of the problem with society. Anything below an 8 is like “ugh I KNOW she’s not a hot piece of ass but like she’s so NICE and AT LEAST I still have sex.”

Sigh. So tired of it all.

 

this is probably the best response and it sums up what i have been thinking for quite some time. meeting a woman online and IRL are worlds apart. A woman might not find you attractive in a photograph but might be swept off her feet on meeting you depending on how you carry yourself, your level of confidence and the common sense and intelligence conveyed through your conversations. thats why i dont trust these researches which claim that women like X attribute or Y attribute. these are done in a digitised manner ( showing pics of men to female subjects ) and not the way real world meetings happen.
the truth is if you are confident, mindful and posses intelligence and practical sense , no woman can resist liking you.

 

What's good for the goose is good for the gander [and bad]. The nature of 'shopping' on-line, for an encounter of the erotic kind, is equally corrupting for both sexes.

My point is that when we meet people in real life then the inner attributes of the person come to the fore... There is then a chance of romance winning out over the 'sexual market place'.... and the cutie over the hottie.

 

I had an experience of meeting two women in real life after seeing them in the social network. And I say I was blown away! In the pictures they didn't seem as beautiful as they are in "real life". It's mind blowing! I don't know...maybe it's their energy you feel and that makes the difference. Something you can't do through a picture or photograph.

 

Chad for obvious reasons. Attraction is non-negotiable. Either you’re hot for a girl or you’re not, and this decision takes milliseconds. It is possible to build attraction if you have good game and a decent personality, but looking attractive is 80% of the deal. If she thinks you are hot, she won’t make it difficult for you.

If you were a woman would you prefer a skinny-fat guy or someone that cares about his body and looks good? Looking like shit sends to everyone around you the message that you don’t care about your life, that you’re lacking a masculine identity and lacking energy.

More often than not, good looking guys are extremely proactive and have an interesting life. Skinny-fat, skin and bones or fat guys USUALLY don’t do anything interesting in their lives because they know that don’t carry that magnetic aura and therefore would be “that weird guy” at a club or bar.

This topic should be addressed more properly, but now I lack the time to explain it all.

Hope it cleared any doubts

 

As a woman doing online dating in the past I found this to be true about most men. I suspect that they may not be the best at picking out the best pictures because in person they were almost always better looking save for the few guys who posted pics from 20 years ago lol. I would advocate that people meet up with any potential people. Issue being of course that on match for most women that would be 3 dates a day everyday. So after years of far too many bad dates with match and the like I chose eharmony and decided I would go out with any man that they matched me up. I did that and met a great guy whom I would have never Gone out with or turned my head to look out based on looks alone.

People rarely know what they want and tend to base dating choices on things that don’t matter in actual long term relationships. It’s always been like this but online dating has made it 100 times worse. Pre online it’s like shopping from a small boutique where you have choices but they are limited. Post online dating is like shopping at the mall of America . You have every choice you could possibly imagine and so you pick the shiniest objects that often when you get home you realize are not functional! Or you can’t afford what you want so you keep trying and trying but you can never get it. Meanwhile you ignore all the other items while on your quest for something that you will never have or if you have it figure out it’s not what you wanted.

I suggest all watch the show married at first sight. It’s a bit crazy but what it does show is that most people if given what they want realize they never really wanted that at all.

Just be open to all. Don’t classify people as average or above or below. Take the time to get to know people on the inside and don’t foreclose part possibilities based on looks alone.