9 years of POM addiction

Hi. Welcome to forum!

Make sure you create a personal journal thread in Reboot Logs section and blog there on a regular basis. As well as just generally be active participant in various forum discussions. I recommend this to everybody new here because it's the major thing that helped me when I was first starting. Just lurking on forums, reading and learning is great. But it usually is so much more powerful to engage. It helps to keep us motivated and accountable when we are active part of community. And keeps this in front of our minds so we don't forget about importance of it and slip away in our old habits. Sharing is also therapeutic. This is a major reason why AA meetings work so good. But that was developed before internet era. These days we can get most of the same benefits online through communities like this. So don't underestimate the power of active participation.

I would also like to suggest you to look into mindfulness meditation. It has helped me personally tremendously to learn how to deal with urges and triggers. It takes a while to get good at it and notice results, so you need to be consistent with it, but once you do it's very powerful. It has been used by sages for thousands of years to deal with various issues of the mind. And in recent decades the science is also catching up to what ancient sages have know for centuries. Meditation these days are widely used as very effective tool by psychologists for treating addiction and by neurologists for supporting recovery of the brain after physical injury. Plus it is generally a great exercise for the brain the same way as jogging is great exercise for the body.

You gotta make sure it is proper mindfulness meditation though. "Mindfulness" meditation where we just focus on breath is more like a concentration meditation instead. It works too but differently and not as powerfully in my experience. Real mindfulness meditation however trains you to accept your urges by understanding the nature of them by observing them, not just suppress them by concentrating on something else instead. It makes you comfortable with them. And once you accept and become comfortable with them there is no need to get rid of them, so there is no need to PMO. Only reason why we PMO is because that urge, that itch in our crotch is uncomfortable, we wanna get rid of it. And then after PMO we have our release. Or we simply want pleasure. And inability to have that pleasure makes us uncomfortable. But if we accept that we can not have pleasure then resistance is gone and there is no reason to PMO.

Acceptance and mindfulness is the key. Check out this Ted talk on acceptance and mindfulness practice, it gives a good idea of what's it's about when it comes to philosophy. The mindfulness practice as described by psychologist in a the video can be used by itself but ideally should be used as supplementation to your daily sitting meditation. Sitting meditation I personally practice and recommend to people is as explained by meditation expert in this YouTube playlist. If you don't like the monk or want other method there is this awesome smartphone app called Headspace for guided meditations.

Wish you lot's of strength and success in your reboot journey!

 

Here some Excellent advice from Fapstronaut "buster brown":

buster brown says --
I have not ejaculated in 535 days except twice through nocturnal emissions. I have never felt better in my life. If you read this

1 -- just focus on other things to better yourself,

2 -- and when the thought of masturbation comes up, workout.

3 -- That is the best thing for me is just doing something,

I have good self control so I can watch a show and that takes my mind off it but I know that that will be hard for beginners , good luck #nofapwednesday


"Dgould91 said: ↑
Got to 20 days and relapsed i am so fucking disappointed in myself now I can't stop fapping"

buster brown says -- I know the feeling of a relapse but it’s okay
4 -- just tell yourself it won’t happen again,

5 -- and just never think about sexual things, if something pops in your head, immediately think of something else, and if you can’t stop thinking about something just go on a run or workout

6 -- and the last thing is Stay Positive, there are so many people who are down on themselves, but just think positively and you will have positive results I promise you that. Think success and succeed, think doubt and fail, having that mindset will help you over come this problem, good luck buddy

*7 -- If you get a thought that is about sex or anything like that immediately kick it out of your mind, this has always worked for me
buster brown, May 9, 2018

"Stfan said: ↑
OMG how have you done that it’s amazing, I am on day 4 and it so hard I mean really hard "

8 -- Well now it’s easy, I can go however long I want I feel like because once you get to like 8 months then it’s 100% habit just not to think about it and then life is so much nicer, I have done so many thing to better myself. Masturbating can take time out of your day and then you are not productive.
buster brown, May 9, 2018

"cambo said:
Thats awesome. I am realizing that to overcome my addiction I must focus on who and what I want to be not focus on not watching porn. I've "known" this for awhile but I wasn't willing to acknowledge that I must be transformed, become someone new; not just try to manage my sickness. What you focus on is what you become! Great progress man, congratulations. ……." cambo, May 9, 2018

 

Welcome to NoFap! Thank you for sharing your story. Best of encouragement to you in your journey!

 

Am your new friend who joined yesterday and am a PMO ADDICTED. i think i have to declare it first.I have been in the prison of PMO for 8 years now since i was in my secondary school untill now iam in last year of my University education.It was yesterday when i decided that can't this be over?.Then i visited some stuffs in the internet untill i met with the NOFAP community and registered.
I hope i will be successful in this process of recovery, with the help of my fellow fapstronuts.AM a new new member in NOFAP community and therefore i dont know many of the things here in the website and how they work.I hope you will hold my hand and clear my parth .
Regards...
#the most pleasant of the unpleasant fights

 

yesterday was my first day sleeping without doing the PMO thing, i wake up at night and the thought came by but i was able to resist my self though it was kind of hard.I usually blocked some of the sites where they will lead me in doing the PMO thing.
I have a girlfriend which am preparing her to be my future wife, we dont sleep due to our religion and culture.My girlfriend likes me so much and she is kind of trying showing me that she will be there for me in case of any trouble though she doesnot really know about my PMO problem but she knows that am lazy and i like to be in the room alone due to my PMO behaviour. In reality, i feel guilty of my situation and sometimes i think that she deserves someone better than me,
PLEASE HELP!

 

Good for you , always remember where you came from and how you felt after pmo'd it can be strong motivation not to go pack to porn / masturbation . If I can do this so can you

 

I hope I can be like you. Nice motivation you have there. Thanks for the sharing.