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Why the hell cant I stop?!

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by NotSoAverageJoe, Dec 8, 2014.

  1. Like seriously... I know how badly porn is fucking over my life, its almost cost me my job
    Can't even stop for a full day, let alone a week. I look at it in the morning, at work, when im driving, when i get home, before bed... all day, my mind cant stop thinking about it.

    Im 23 and have never had sex or a girlfriend, im depressed and lonely as fuck, yet i cant stop.

    If it wasnt for the fact that i cant afford a new one, id smash my computer, but then id have to smash my phone too, both of which i need.

    I know, I know... lift weights, eat healthy, read, meditate

    I do all of that except meditation, I know that would help but im too busy watching porn
     
  2. Why the fuck would i pay $10 for 7 minutes of audio on a CD, theres 1000s of hours of that for free on youtube
     
  3. welmwerth

    welmwerth Fapstronaut

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    Hey yukon, thanks for the link. I might check it out - maybe there's something there that I haven't found elsewhere yet.

    NotSoAverageJoe - speaking from my perspective, it's because they give me a high in a short span of time, without me having to do much, other than load up some videos or pics. They give me an illusion of control - those women don't make fun of me, I don't need to go through the whole "game" and they just give me a part of what I want and there's a variety of the stuff. Those are also the problems.

    I have to figure out why I'm running to them and I mean deeply look at my life. Those things I wrote above are just on the surface for me - or maybe symptoms of something else.

    For me, it is related to fear, loneliness, lack of self care and respect. Until I can learn to build my mind into something that allows me to move forward, this problem with porn, fantasies, etc will be difficult to minimise.

    I don't really believe that after so and so days, I would become completely healed of these cravings. They can be minimise or manage in some ways though.

    You mentioned you are lonely and don't have a girlfriend. Hey, I'm in the same boat, but much older. Perhaps, start with trying to make some friends and do some activities with them. I don't know if it's going to instantly get rid of your cravings and I doubt it will for me, but maybe give it a go.
     
    Last edited: Dec 9, 2014
  4. Whatever

    Whatever Fapstronaut

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    Stop bull****ing yourself and stop wasting my time.

    If you would have said "I can't stop nourishing my organism" or "I can't stop hidrating my organism", then that would have been a legitimate concern. But to say that you cannot not rub your penis until you ejaculate..that is bull***t.

    As the janitor from my cousin's brother's uncle's shoelace factory once said, "don't f**k yourself or you'll end up like me". Wise words indeed...


    Just keep trying...it took me 7 years to quit my 8 year old smoking habbit.
     
    Last edited: Dec 9, 2014
  5. monkotto

    monkotto Fapstronaut

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    a very simple answer:

    you cant stop because you are addicted to pornshit!

    stopping this habit is an extrem hard fight! (for many people here)

    you have to be very strong - there is no other way.
     
  6. Poblano

    Poblano Fapstronaut

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    You can't stop because you are an addict.
    Have you made any serious attempt to stop?

    You say
    "I know, I know... lift weights, eat healthy, read, meditate

    I do all of that except meditation, I know that would help but im too busy watching porn"

    But my question to you is what do you really know?
    For you I would say mediation is critical. You are using porn as an escape from something.
    If you are looking at porn multiple times per day it is unlikely that you are going to be able to start from there and become porn free forever.
    First set yourself an attainable goal.
    Can you go without porn for one day?
    You are posting here because you are in pain and depressed. You are using the porn as an escape from those feelings and it isn't working. It is really making it worse.
    Also important you have to accept yourself for how you are.
    Accept the fact that you think about porn.
    Also accept the fact that you don't have to act on those thoughts.
    Put on porn blockers, get an accountability partner. Reach out and try to get help. There are 12 step programs you may find helpful.
    But do something now!
     
  7. KrmGrn

    KrmGrn Fapstronaut

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    For me, I started doing everything that was suggested to deal with this habit. Install blocking software,snap the rubber band, leave my door open, get out of the house more, exercise, meditate, post on this forum every day, etc etc. All of these things people recommend are ways to help break the addiction. Not all of them might work for you, but if you really want to beat this, it can't hurt to try anything and everything.
     
  8. goldstein

    goldstein Fapstronaut

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    I would strongly suggest you to install porn blockers and keep the password in a place far from your computer. Use Norton Family and OpenDNS to block porn or sex related web sites. It worked for me. I installed them in my computer and mobile phone. I apologize in advance for my english.
     
  9. ###

    ### Fapstronaut

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    If fixing the externals (exercising more, distraction) doesn't help--like it didn't help me--you might explore the idea of a 12 step sex addiction group. They treat compulsive masturbation the same way other 12 step groups treat addictive substances. Basically an addict has a compromised willpower. A broken washing machine can't fix itself. It may take outside help. Worked for me.
     
  10. Zyzz's Witnesses

    Zyzz's Witnesses Fapstronaut

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    Get a fucking grip.If you focused your time in actually improving rather than beeing sad and depressed you wouldn't be what you are right now.Its just day 0 talks over and over again.Get your shit togheter your 23 you have a brain , use it!How can i imrpove, how can i get better should always be in your mind.
    You want to snap your fingers and have life sorted out for you well let me break it for you that does NOT happen.
    Hard work and lots out of comfort zone experience is needed.
     
    Last edited: Dec 11, 2014
  11. ifeelyou

    ifeelyou Fapstronaut

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    Remain focused. The urge of wanting to stop is already there. Try to find other meaningful diversions. As with anything in life, it'll be difficult- but very much achievable. Best of luck.
     
  12. blockydude

    blockydude Fapstronaut

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    If you think about sex much you will eventually fap.
     

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