My introduction to you!

Hi everyone!
I'm so happy to have become a user of NoFap. My name is Oscar, I'm 27 years old and are living in Sweden.

For me, my addiction started about 2 years ago as a response to my mental illness. Since I was a child I have had low self-esteem and felt quite anxious.
Later on a I started a relationship with a girl, that became very destructive towards me. Long story short, I gave everything for her but she gave nothing back. I worked all days and she sat at home and didn't do anything to help out in our house and she didn't pay any bills or food either.
After the relationship I had changed very much, I was depressed, angry and started isolating more and more, my ex didn't almost allow me to meet my family and friends so I had nearly lost all contact with them.

In December 2015 I did get a new job, which was very stressful and now I came to the point where I couldn't take it anymore. I stopped caring about anything, I didn't take care of myself or my home. I was like in a bubble and I think at this point this started to getting out of hand with porn and masturbating.
In October 2016 I went my local health center to meet a physician, and I got diagnosed with fatigue syndrome. I was home from work under a couple of months, and I started masturbating more and more. Every time It felt like would be able to get an orgasm, I masturbated.

As time went on, I felt more and more anxious in social situations, I felt much more insecure on how to interact with others and I felt more unattractive. These where things I didn't have problems with before. I was thinking a lot on like, when is the next time i will be able to masturbate. And my tolerance increased a lot. I wanted to find more and more stimulating videos to watch, so it took more time finding videos that turned me on. I also experiencing big problems with concentration and memory. I forget important duties at work, struggle listening on conversations for example.

I had enough of that, and I want to take control over myself. I want to move on and meet new adventures. And that's why I came here.

Thank you for letting me share!

 

Hey Robane!
Thanks and welcome to you as well! Yes that is true, it is a symptom from major issues. I always have had quite high sex drive and I had sexual fantasies already as a young child, like for example I would go out into the forest and rub my genitals against a tree. And when I was about 14 I started masturbating. But it has been in control until 2 years ago, that's when I lost it. So i think it's been inside of me all the time to finally starting to sprout.

My physical life are good right now and I work out regularly at the gym, it has a significant effect on me and helps me feeling better. I also eat a lot healthier now and has dropped some weight. So things are on a good track

 

Yeah I will try to start connecting with people after summertime when things will start up again. It could be interesting to do something crazy like you suggested further on, right know I have some debts to pay off and I want to be free from that.
But It's a nice idea from you, will keep that in mind!

Best wishes to you Robane!