How to overcome general anxiety?

ERP - gradually exposing yourself to higher levels of anxiety through constant and consistent exposure.

 

It can be hard sometimes I am at home by myself and I feel the anxiety of what I am going to have to do later in the day. I stop what I am doing probably just watching netflix and meditate and pray. I ask God for his peace and to please forgive me. I relax without technology or workout and it goes away. Also cold showers somehow help. And don't take any drugs even caffeine and little things like that. Xans are from the devil and only work temporarily.

 

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There’s a part of Navy SEAL training called “drown-proofing” where they bind your hands behind your back, tie your feet together, and dump you into a 9-foot-deep pool.

Your job is to survive for five minutes.

Like most of SEAL training, the vast majority of cadets who attempt drown-proofing fail. Upon being tossed into the water, many of them panic and scream to be lifted back out. Some struggle until they slip underwater where they proceed to lose consciousness and have to be fished out and resuscitated. Over the years, a number of trainees have even died during the exercise.

But some people make it. And they do so because they understand two counter intuitive lessons.

The first lesson of drown-proofing is paradoxical: the more you struggle to keep your head above water, the more likely you are to sink.

With your arms and legs bound, it’s impossible to maintain yourself at the surface for the full five minutes. Even worse, your limited attempts to keep your body afloat will only cause you to sink faster. The trick to drown-proofing is to actually let yourself sink to the bottom of the pool. From there, you lightly push yourself off the pool floor and let your momentum carry you back to the surface. Once there, you can grab a quick breath of air and start the whole process over again.

Strangely, surviving drown-proofing requires no superhuman strength or endurance. It doesn’t even require that you know how to swim. On the contrary, it requires the ability to not swim. Instead of resisting the physics that would normally kill you, you must surrender to them and use them to save your own life.

The second lesson of drown-proofing is a bit more obvious, but also paradoxical: the more you panic, the more oxygen you will burn and the more likely you are to fall unconscious and drown. In a sick and twisted way, the exercise turns your survival instinct against you: the more intense your desire to breathe, the less you will be able to breathe. The more intense your will to live, the greater the chance you will die.

More than a test of physical will, drown-proofing is a test of each cadet’s emotional self-control in situations of extreme danger. Can he control his own impulses? Can he relax in the face of potential death? Can he willingly risk his life in the service of some higher value or goal?

This skill — the ability to let go of control when one wants it most.

You lean into the fear and uncertainty, and just when you think you’re going to drown, just as you reach the bottom, it will launch you back to your salvation.

And how do we do this? By letting go. By giving up. By surrendering. Not out of weakness. But out of a respect that the world is beyond our grasp. By recognizing that we are fragile and limited and but temporary specks in the infinite reaches of time. You do it by relinquishing control, not because you feel powerless, but because you are powerful. Because you decide to let go of things that are beyond your control. You decide to accept that sometimes, people won’t like you, that often you will fail, that usually you have no fucking clue what you’re doing.

Confidence – The more we try to feel confident, the more insecurity and anxiety we will create. The more we accept our faults, the more comfortable we will feel in our own skin.

Security – Trying to make ourselves feel as secure as possible generates more insecurity. Being comfortable with uncertainty is what allows us to feel secure.

Control – The more we strive to control our own feelings and impulses, the more powerless we will feel. Our emotional life is unruly and often uncontrollable, and it’s the desire to control it that makes it worse. Conversely, the more we accept our feelings and impulses, the more we’re able to direct them and process them.

You have to show your mind that the only way to reach the surface is by letting yourself sink.

- Mark Manson

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Learn to focus on what you can control rather than worrying about what you can't control.

https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.p...ontrol-and-the-things-you-can-control.185473/

Anxiety is basically being overly cautious. Excessively careful. Too much concern for possible failure. Making too much conscious effort to have success. You're trying to gather as much information as possible in order to get rid of your fear for something you're incompetent and insecure about. Focusing too much on all the things that you can't control.

Perfectionism is the result of a mental obsession with achieving the “ideal”—as a minimum requirement—in all situations and areas of life. Procrastination results from the refusal to take action until an “ideal” result is guaranteed in every situation.

Perfectionism: obsession with the “ideal.” Perfectionism represents a belief system about how life should work—not how life actually does work, but how it should. This is a crucial point. Perfectionists live in an all-encompassing world of “shoulds.” They especially direct this toward themselves. They “should” be this, they “should” have done that, this “shouldn’t” have happened to them. And, in every case, what actually did happen never measures up to their judgment about what should have happened. Perfectionism leads to a perpetual dissatisfaction with the past and pessimism about the future. In both cases, past and future, as well as the present, perfectionists never take ownership of what happens to them.

Procrastination: refusal to take action. Procrastinators insist on guarantees before taking action in a world that doesn’t provide any guarantees. They continually end up feeling guilty over their stupidity, and yet they keep emotionally insisting on the guarantees. Because of their obsession with perfectionism, they find it difficult to make a decision or a commitment unless they can be certain it will lead to an “ideal” result. Out of necessity, they have to produce some results in life just to make an income, but it’s always a struggle. Procrastinators are their own worst enemies because they undermine their own confidence and cut themselves off from opportunities, resources, and capabilities that other people could provide to them—if only they would take action at the appropriate time.

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Too much in your own head and not allowing yourself to experience reality for what it really is.

It's the resistance that's creating the unwanted tension.

It's like bungee jumping. It can be very safe and even fun, but not allowing yourself to let go of control is what destroys you.

 

A lot easier said than done, but to put it simply, the less you think about it and fret over it, the less it will affect you.

I find that really getting "into" something helps. Whether it be a book or activity that takes your mind off worrying about worrying. During one of my bad spells with anxiety I got into creative writing and was writing away, immersing myself in ideas and typing them out. An hour flew by and then I suddenly remembered my anxiety and nerves and realised for a brief moment they had dissipated and I felt fine again.

Obviously it comes and goes, some days are a lot worse than others. That comes back to my first point - the more good days you can string together, the less likely a bad day will set you back.

 

For me it has always been running that has given me balance in life. Ive has alot of problems with anxiety and addiction throughout my life and running has kept me healthy and on track. But yeah, whatever it is that you find in your life that gives you that feeling of being in contact with yourself and the world dont lose it.

 

this is one of the best thing I´ve ever read

 

The best way is probably cognitive behavioral therapy combined with some anti-anxiety meds.

 

Umm. I'm dealing with some social anxiety too, but im being carless lately and its so helpful! Whenever I get stressed, I remember "be careless", and I immediately change myself. Also, if you have a problem with yourself ( your look for example) work on it, try and see what you can do to improve it to make you feel better. Do something that makes you proud and happy, and when the stress hits, think that you are doing well in some particular things. Might sound cheesy, but I'm dealing with anxiety ( as I said) and these things work for me. Medication is a bad option..

 

At the moment im recovering from an ankle surgery, so i cant run unfortunately for another month or so which is a huge bummer. Usually though i used to run somewhere from 8 to 15 km a day 5 to 6 days a week depending on how i felt. I know that obsessive behaviour really well man and for me running and meditation have been great ways to sort of get rid of that obsessive energy and manage it. But it doesnt have to be running per se, ive found that any physical activity helps with that. Theres also an article i found very useful about anxiety:

https://www.anxietycentre.com/anxiety-tips/stop-anxiety-attacks.shtml

 

I am a person suffering from GAD or generalized anxiety disorder and I abstained from porn for over 6 months but with time I got obsessive sexual thoughts and I couldn't control and I am struggling with it now I can't no longer continue NoFap,if I stop PMO for 2 or 3 days I can't focus on studies my mind will always think of sex and I have to relapse...plss find a solution to this...

 

You need to believe in yourself and have faith that you can do it it’s all about your mindset I know it’s hard but you just have to fight and fight till you don’t have anymore fight in you !! Don’t give up and don’t give in I believe you can fight anxiety I know you feel alone even get depressed I fight depression and anxiety but I get past it because of my faith in God and also believing that I can do it you have to tell yourself that you can do it , everyday that you wake up fight it you can do it man