Sick of this shit

I think I can understand know how you feel. I had a chaotic childhood constantly fighting off bullies. ALOT of bad shit has been happening for me last couple of years as well; constant conflicts between family , close people passing away, realizing my friends we're all toxic so I had to cut them off, girl cheating on me, my dog passed away, struggling with studies, not being able to find a job, drinking too much alcohol and doing too much drugs, people mistaking my kindness for weakness..... It's a shitty vicious cycle. I still feel kind of burned out from all this, had ALOT of suicidal thoughts in secret. Luckily I managed to see the bigger picture and decided if because I'm going to die anyways, I might as well go out being brave and give it everything I've got this time, instead of living my life in fear.

One thing I've learned is you can't change PEOPLE but you can change the way you VIEW them.

I hope you have a good day bro

 

It's the hormones brother. Everyday we are growing as a person. True, Some have it easier then others. I'm in the same situation, lost ALL my friends because the situation became too toxic. Too materialistic and selfish. Always picked the wrong girls ( sluts). Losing hope in life. I became angry at everything. I didnt know what to do with this energy. I began using it in the wrong ways. ( porn prostitutes and other stupid shit) now i put it all in my health and in my goals. no more fucking around

 

If i were in your situation , i would mostly think about my mother and myself , F*ck the rest ; Focus on self-growth , i'm not sure what country you are in , but i believe that there is always a way to redeem yourself , find someway to go to college since it's mostly the easiest way and most obvious path to become successful ( There are other paths , but you will suffer and you will need a crazy iron willed soul to pass through them ) As for going insane ; It's fine as long as you channel your insanity in something good , such as closing yourself from your surroundings and spending that time doing the aforementioned self-growth , Good luck to you , you do not need anyone to believe in you , YOU need to believe in yourself !