Motivation and Advice from a guy who's been abstinent from P for 3+ years

Hi folks, I don't usually post new threads but I thought I would put together some advice and motivation that has helped me along the way, it's just advice so take it or leave it.

• You can choose to be better than your mistakes through action, perseverance and holding on to a vision of yourself in the future.

• A relapse is not always a failure if you strive to learn from it and take responsibility.

• I relapsed countless times when i first made the decision that i wanted to stop and spent about 2 years relapsing before i managed to get the right level of help. The important thing is that i never lost sight of my ultimate goal.

• There are things about yourself you probably don't even know yet, good things, redeemable things about your character and your strengths which you haven't given the opportunity to thrive. Beating the addiction will free up time for you to focus on building these and conquering your weaknesses.

• Things in life that are worth having are often born out of hard work and effort, watching porn takes 0 hard work and very little effort.

• Learning to appreciate the value of delayed gain through trial and effort rather than short term gain is really important since it will teach you to take pride in your achievements. Things like playing a sport competetively or building something that requires patience and skill will give you a sense of fulfillment and pride. It also teaches you to deal with set backs and when things don't always go as planned.

• Do not become too emotionally invested in what other people think about you, only you know how hard you are working to overcome the skeletons in your closet. There will always be people in life who don't like you for whatever reason, whether you are a good person or a bad person...Just imagine being a politician for a day!

• I've been to the pit of despair and felt what it's like to be broken, rejected, demonised and stereotyped, i've been both a victim of crime and a perpetrator. If i continued to believe other peoples negative hate towards me, i simply would have stayed the same and never changed. Instead i took responsibility for my behaviour, sought out help, and educated myself. You don't have to go as far as i did if you recognise the things in life which are causing you problems and get help.

• Find someone that you can confide in during times of need, be it a family member, a very good friend or even a healthcare professional like a good psychologist or a doctor. Don't be ashamed to reach out for help, there are people out there who care, you just have to find them and if you aint looking it will never come.

• Something that is common with addictions is the realisation and difficulty in coming to terms with the fact you may never be able to use again. My advice is to not think that far ahead, just take each day at a time, just for today i don't have to use/watch/ pmo etc. It's normal to have reservations and fears over how to live your life without your vices but i promise in time it gets easier and in the end you will think to yourself 'man i can't believe i used to do all those things'

• As humans we are very good at adapting and in our cases we are simply learning to adapt to a different way of living.

I hope you all realise your full potential and know that we are all part of something important and meaningful, if anything we all prove to others that men (and women) are prepared to try to improve themselves where porn is concerned, we choose to take the path less trodden and that makes us pioneers, like astronaughts we are the FAPSTRONAUGHTS!