anyone can help me ?

You're not alone my friend, I'd advise you to look for what makes you PMO, clear your mind for a minute and stop regretting and beating yourself up, no matter how many times you relapse you can always start again. So I want you to look for the reason for your willpower to fade, is it the internet? block porno sites, if it was being alone try to always be around other people, or go out more, if it was out of boredom.. always make yourself busy, and the most important thing is to always keep coming to this site reading people posts and reply to them and feel like you belong to a site called "NOFAP", it'd be shameful if you fap then lol. good luck my friend.

 

Oh man, if only I had an answer for you.

God knows how badly I want to rid myself of this. But I simply cannot. It is amazing how much raw emotion I have felt about wanting to quit this addiction, only for it to fade away instantly in the face of an intense urge.

I have been struggling for months. I have no idea how anyone gets to 90 days. Absolutely zero.

But I suppose the reason is actually quite simple...This is addiction. If it was easy, it would not really be a problem.

Those people who have changed themselves...They are simply stronger than us. You and I both need to make ourselves stronger, strong enough to fight the urges that plague us.

There are things that cause you to PMO everyday...You need to be conscious of them.

There are things that cause you to not PMO everyday...You need to be conscious of them as well.

Avoid your triggers, indulge in real happiness. Mastering which is which is important.

If only I could do so.

 

Looking at your counter I think you have achieved quite a lot. Congratulations!

Willpower, like any other muscle, needs to be trained and then kept fit. You cannot expect to walk into a gym and become a weight-lifting champion after your first set of weights. You also cannot assume that running a marathon once means you can repeat it anytime at ease without proper training in between the races.

As with any other training, it can be sometimes hard, it can be painful, sometimes we have to make us do it. But ultimately, in the end, it is rewarding. That is why we are doing it. If you keep falling back after almost two weeks, wow, you got yourself over the worst part. And even though it does not immediately seems like it, you are getting stronger with each an every day you keep yourself clean.

I know how hard it is to break from streaks, but it is important to try to keep them short and get back on track. If you can get more than a clean week under your belt, IMHO it is not so much about dopamine levels at that precise moment, but natural sex drive building up. I don't think our bodies will ever forget the PMO shortcut and assigned pleasures, but rewiring our brain means it would no longer be the first choice of directing this drive. It seems by but putting away PMO you have created a void that needs to be filled with something real to keep falling back.

I don't like the philosophy of life being a constant fight and struggle. Come at peace with yourself. I like the approach that achievements take effort, but exercising this effort is not contradictory to feeling good at that very moment. I can run a marathon and be tired, in some pain, but still feel super and happy good while doing it.

And if you fall, if you stop because you cannot make another step, take a rest. There is a reason behind it and that reason may not always be your fault. This is the time when we need close friends, somebody to comfort us. Proximity of beloved people will avoid or break the streak. Replace fake with real emotions. This is the time when you have an opportunity to realize that you are not alone on your path.

It is very important to realize that while masturbating and watching porn is usually a solo gig, getting rid of it is not. You must not be alone in this. Equally important is to realize, after you reach your goal and get your life back, that the victory belongs to victors, which is not just you, but everyone who supported you along your path. Learn to share - the pain and the happiness. - Otherwise, what would be the point of all this?

 

My advice is to set your sights lower. Starting off with a 90 day challenge is pretty daunting. Just shoot for 10. When you reach 10, tell yourself, "I just need to make it 20 days and then I'm at 30, which is 1/3 of the way to 90. Make it to 45 days and you're halfway there. If you start at 90, it feels like the progress is a lot slower.

The way that has been working for me is to aim for 30. When I get to 30, then all I'm thinking about is getting to 60. When I'm at 60, that's when I start looking at the 90 days.

But really, it's all about one day at a time. One hour at a time, really. Identify the times when you're going to be most at risk for a relapse, the "red zone", and have a strategy for getting through it.

Good luck!