Socializing, Meeting Women, Want It But Seems Like A Waste Of Time

You can find all sorts of evidence to support and reinforce your beliefs about anything.

Just because you've experienced shitty people doesn't mean everyone is shitty.

Just because there's terrible divorces going on doesn't mean everyone has gone through a terrible divorce.

Confirmation bias, also called confirmatory bias or my side bias, is the tendency to search for, interpret, favor, and recall information in a way that confirms one's preexisting beliefs or hypotheses.

It's up to you, but just make sure you're not sabotaging yourself out of fear.

 

I can totally relate. But, dude, you need to unf*ck your mind first.

We've been lied to all these years. (Just like the lie of PMO.)

Three resources that helped:

1. "No More Rejection! The 8-Part Series for Dancers" [link]
   
2. "The Man's Guide to Women: Scientifically Proven Secrets from the Love Lab About What Women Really Want" [link]
   
3. "Mate: Become the Man Women Want" [link]

I don't completely agree with everything they say, but it helps. It's up to you.

 

Hey, thanks for your post!
Speaking just to your distrust of women, which I also have (must be linked to an abusive mother), three thoughts:
(1) lovely, giving, generous, nurturing, forgiving, smart, loyal and supportive, yet sexy and/or attractive women really do exist! I know one or two and I'm in awe! But... though they may be hard to find..... we gotta look (at them, their friends and family) real well. Skin-deep doesn't cut it at all. I'm not big on traditional dating (too scripted for me), but to find a good woman we must get to know her well and need to look into her heart and mind (in that order).
(b) secondly, we may wanna consider a woman from a country other than the US. Much of humanity lives in far less "me"-focused, more stable-family-oriented societies -- I have too -- and though there's good and bad everywhere (and in everyone) male-female relations are often less fraught with litigious, disposable-relationship, consumptive attitudes than statistics clearly show we often suffer through here in the US.
Naturally, there are exceptions to be found everywhere, but we might do well to consider taking it slowly with a person we like who is also from a stable-marriage society.
(c) Lastly, just as it "takes one to know one" (for instance, an honest person), so too do I believe that "it takes one to find one" (say, a loyal person), so the more we work on ourselves the easier it will be to find a good person who understands and appreciates us.
Peace!

 

You have to become who you want to attract and I have had the same feelings but now I’m tired of having that negative mindset accept yourself and your flaws and say fuck it anyway sympathize with women they are human just like you.

 

I have sensed what the OP is saying for a long time and my aim is to reject it. Either I can stay there forever or forever improve myself little by little.

 

When i was a teen, the whole lone wolf act used to make me feel really cool. Hell, i felt cool. But now i feel it was a mistake. I too find it hard to keep a conversation going.

 

Kinda.
First I wanted to be the casual type of man for women, the ones they have flings with. I could pull that off a little bit, to a small extend. I didn't find that (besides the sex) mostly not so enjoyable. As an introvert socializing and meeting up alot, isn't energizing for me.
Then I wanted a good commited long term relationship. Where I was the provider type. That was enjoyable in some ways, and not in some others ways. Overall prety much equal to being single.

What now?
I chose to live a single & no-dating/sex lifestyle the last 3 years.
Because: I don't want children. I am just as happy single. I wanted to try sexual abstinance
* Playing the provider/marriage/etc. role I don't want (where i see no point in because I don't want children (thus no need to support my child and the mother of my child)). Also the provider role as a man comes with high financial risks nowadays; where you ex-wife can take more then 50% of your possesions, and you have to pay alot of ex-partner alimony and also often it happens there has to be paid rediculous high amount of child-alimony.
* Playing the, casual (non commited) sex partner role. I found the hassle not worth the sex in the past. Nowadays I sometimes consider, being willing to (try to) take on that role again maybe. But I notice I will only want to do that if i can pull it off with little effort/energy (so the reward and affort is in balance for me). I think I might give myself a timeperiod to experiment with this type of role again, and see if i like or hate it now.