Similarity Between Porn and Online Dating

Fair enough but I'm confused why you think that anyone on e-Harmony don't want the same thing as you. In fact, I'd think that they'd match you with someone who wants the same thing as you.

 

Well, and today on Plenty of Fish I found out about fake profiles trying to get my personal information. Guess it's not so much "fun". And really horrible for getting me in the porn-searching mindset. Almost thought I was going to go through with a "hookup" that turned out to be fake

 

Thanks Quinn, I appreciate the perspective. Really the point for me, again, is just to step out of my comfort zone regarding dating. I'm not expecting anything from these sites, other than me doing something that is out of my comfort zone. The result doesn't matter. I much prefer the "real" world. (But I also have to step out of my comfort zone there too). So, yeah, I don't want nor expect a wife out of any of this, so E-Harmony isn't going to be for me. I just want to do the free sites, where I can practice, that's all. And I suppose just when it comes to dating in general, the result doesn't matter. It's the process that matters, doing something I haven't tried before, getting better, conquering a fear

 

Hi Salvacion. Yeah it's horrible. Yesterday I was playing around on POF all day while I was at work. That's new, that I would be doing something like that during work. Not good. Yeah I definitely feel more empty and alone now. What was supposed to be a good way to "meet someone" turned out to be just another disappointment

 

I'm having a real hard time with the online dating sites, binging, etc., and then leading to porn the last four days. I think I need to give it up completely, and just concentrate my energies on the real world. Kind of sad, because I was thinking that even online dating was stepping out of my comfort zone. Well, now I've tried it, and the costs outweigh the benefits in my opinion. At least I tried. Now I can leave it behind, get back on a NoFap streak, and work at meeting women in the real world. Looking for some moral support!

 

Thanks a bunch Salvacion, very well put! Appreciate it!

 

Too bad online dating did not work out for you guys, like it has been for me. It's very easy to think about relapsing when you are scrolling, and swiping through a wall of beautiful girls. What stops me from relapsing right now, is the messages! When you are connecting and engaging with these girls then you dont need to fap over them. Why would you when you can potentially meet them in real life? It would be a waste of energy and you would just fall back into PMO patterns. The return of ED stopping you from having sex its just not worth it.

 

Hi Ninja, that's great that it's working well for you! I'm just not in the same place right now. I notice that you have a good NoFap streak going. I wonder if because you're more "rebooted" than me, you're having an easier time with online dating? At this point, I'm fine with just focusing on real-world women and dating. However, when you're at a club, "scoping out the hotties", that doesn't necessarily help with NoFap either

 

Great post @TheMightyQuinn. Sounds like you're NoFap's online dating expert

Match.com seems to attract creeps. James Holmes had an account and there's a few stories of women being raped and/or murdered by their dates. It suprises me that the site is going, I expect most of the women on there are fake. What kind of woman would go on a site that has a history of having members who are criminals? If I was dating I was dating I'd use eHarmony or ChristianCafe.

 

I have used match.com for years I haven’t experienced any of that stuff? Maybe the U.K. version is better? I already picked up one phone number and talking to another girl on there.

My experience with eHarmony was not good last time I tried. It was full of fake profiles, nobody responded. I think the fact that you are forced to answer hundreds of questions before you can use the website scares many people off. Who wants to sit an exam when you have dating apps that allow you to chat instantly after a few minutes? And eHarmony is locked behind a paywall you can’t talk or do anything unless you pay. Match.com also has a paywall but in my experience there are more real people. And they actually talk unlike eHarmony.

 

No worse. Most of the news stories come from the UK site. I guess a man is more likely than a woman to kidnap, rape or murder so maybe it won't effect you as as much.

 

I dunno i haven't seen any of that stuff and we are both from the UK Have you tried the site personally, because i'm using it right now and its working for me. I think every dating app is going to have some sort of horror stories that is just the nature of it. I don't think its isolated to just one platform. Personally i think that POF and Bumble are much worse. POF is just full of fake profiles, cam girls and scammers these days. And Bumble is full of time wasters. You rarely get matches and when you do the girls rarely talk. And if they do talk its only like one response and then they never talk again. At least on Tinder, you can have actual "conversations" which lead to phone numbers and dates...

There have been quite a lot of rape/murder news articles lately here, but from what i have read its just being random people. They did not meet through any dating apps, it was encounters in real life. Clearly this country has many problems at the moment..

 

No I haven't used the site. I'm not dating now so there's no need. You do have horror stories with other sites but none of those horror stories include illegal activities. Going on a date with a rude or arrogant person isn't nice but it's a lot better than dating someone who plans to murder you at the end of the date. As far as I know the only other site that has similar stories is Tinder.