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I've conditioned myself to a specific type of stimulation via masturbation and now I can't enjoy sex

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by engineheat, Sep 12, 2018.

  1. Sep 12, 2018 #1
    engineheat

    engineheat Fapstronaut

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    I've conditioned myself to a specific type of masturbation. Not only do I grip hard, but I also like to tickle my left nipple while pleasing myself. This is went on for a couple of years when I was single. The nipple stimulation greatly increased my pleasure. It's almost like a pleasure amplifier for the penis.

    Now I've got a partner, I find myself not feeling much when penetrating. Also, the fact that my nipple is not being stimulated also makes it hard to feel pleasure at my penis. And then I would get limp. Although medications make it possible to maintain erection, I still don't feel much from sex. It's just completely different than the type of stimulation I'm used to.

    It's almost like the sensation at my penis is somehow linked to nipple stimulation. Can the mind/nerves work like that?

    I want to abstain from any masturbation/sex for 3 or 4 month and see if I can reset myself. Does anyone have any similar experience? Maybe not the nipple part, but if you've recovered from lost penile sensation due to masturbation, please share. I really envy men who can ejaculate in minutes and do so multiple times in a night.

    Thanks
     
    engineheat, Sep 12, 2018
    engineheat, Sep 12, 2018
    #1
  2. Sep 13, 2018 #2
    engineheat

    engineheat Fapstronaut

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    any comments or suggestions would be appreciated. thanks
     
    engineheat, Sep 13, 2018
    engineheat, Sep 13, 2018
    #2
  3. Sep 23, 2018 #3
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    You can become conditioned to need any kind of stimulation. I'm a woman but I lost my sensitivity due to MO'ing myself a certain way. It took 46 days of not touching myself for my sensitivity to get restored enough to start having orgasms with my partner. Just stop MO'ing, leave yourself alone and let time do its thing :)
     
    Deleted Account, Sep 23, 2018
    Deleted Account, Sep 23, 2018
    #3
    JoePineapples and Jason_Tesla_19 like this.
  4. Sep 23, 2018 #4
    GottaMakeIt

    GottaMakeIt Fapstronaut

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    You simply need to recondition yourself. Like some of us are conditioned to porn, you have your own (far less damaging) way of stimulation. It seems that you only need to abstain long enough so that you stop doing that thing with your nipple.

    If you also watched porn, recovery will take longer.
     
    GottaMakeIt, Sep 23, 2018
    GottaMakeIt, Sep 23, 2018
    #4
    JoePineapples likes this.
  5. Sep 23, 2018 #5
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    Worth mentioning as well, if you fantasise while MO'ing this will make real sex feel not very good. It conditions your mind to need the mental stimulation of the fantasies to feel pleasure. Fantasising had the same desensitising effect on me as porn.
     
    Deleted Account, Sep 23, 2018
    Deleted Account, Sep 23, 2018
    #5
    GottaMakeIt and JoePineapples like this.
  6. Sep 24, 2018 #6
    engineheat

    engineheat Fapstronaut

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    Thanks, I heard the rule of thumb is that it takes 90 day of no masturbation, no sex to reset oneself? Thanks
     
    engineheat, Sep 24, 2018
    engineheat, Sep 24, 2018
    #6
    Inactive User likes this.
  7. Sep 24, 2018 #7
    Inactive User

    Inactive User Fapstronaut

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    I am really close to 90 days and am just beginning to feel like I am much more strong and resistant to every day temptations. Like now I can often look at and admire women in a more healthy way instead of feeling lustful and turned on. At day 21 I started immediately pushing out temptations as soon as they arrived, but now it definitely feels different and like PMO is something in my past—not something that I still struggle with.
     
    Inactive User, Sep 24, 2018
    Inactive User, Sep 24, 2018
    #7

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