I always relapse around 30 days, need help

Congratulations on the progress you've made, you've come a long way and it probably doesn't even feel like you're "addicted" anymore, since you spend the great majority of your time without porn.

I know what it's like hitting a plateau, it's frustrating because you would think it would be easy once you came this far. It just doesn't work that way though. Over time we develop deep neural pathways that associate porn with the "reward" of an orgasm - and all the feel-good brain chemicals that get released in the process.

If it took years to develop, it's not going to go away too quickly either. But it can be done.

I'm not sure what method you used to quit initially, but I used a method that may help you to break through this plateau.

First thing is you need a goal. Since you are consistently relaspsing after about a month, I recommend 2 months to be the goal. Write it on the wall. Keep it close to you. Re-write it every morning. By doing that you are actually developing a neural pathway related to the goal.

Then you can use a method called CBT to figure out what is triggering you, and you can remove the triggers. You may already be familiar with that method. If you screw up and get triggered, I use something called the Wim Hoff method (breathing technique) to get my mind off porn. It works! You might already be familiar with both of these

If not, and you care to know more, I'm starting a weekly group that will meet face-to-face (in a virtual meeting) to learn these techniques and also be accountability partners.

That might work well for you, since you will have to break it down only a week at a time.

If you're interested PM me for details.

 

What are you telling yourself around the 30 mark? Your self-talk and limiting beliefs need to come out into the open.

 

How specifically is your craving for dopamine at the 30 day mark any different than at any other time? You are your body/brain, it's not something that overrides your free-will. You have a internal wall that you need to knock down - it's especially important to focus on what you are doing around that time and double-down commitment.

 

Concentrate on how to recognize your triggers then build an offensive strategy to fight it off with mental exercises and the exercises consist of training your mind on how to switch your desires into activities like taking a walk going to the library or call a friend or loved one to fracture your urges and meditate and pray daily so you can develop new ideas.on how to successfully combat your addictions. Stay on a positive attitude and eventually you will be triumphant.

 

You need to be prepared to set aside some time and energy to rebuilding your wall and strengthening your resolve before the storm hits. Reboot your reboot so to speak. Double down on your commitment. Think about weakening your triggers. When you turn away from them and say no you will get stronger and the triggers will get weaker.

 

I would say every 30 days you need to reboot your reboot and really stop and take inventory - examine yourself, look at what your thought processes are, root out any limiting beliefs because different one will emerge at different points. You have a series of bad thought processes that must inevitably be eliminated if you are going to succeed. States of anger are my biggest ones, because they put me in a place where I don't care about anything.