It's getting hard

As bizarre as it may sound relapsing is a part of what motivated me to reset my counter and try again. I've had streaks of ranging from 1 and 2 days to 6, to 15, to 43 to 111 but these numbers don't actually matter. What matters is how you feel when you relapse. Only you can use that as motivation to reach 22 days, go for it.

 

Majority of people's problem is pornography itself.. I mean there are people who are addicted to masturbating because of how it feels to orgasm but pornography tends to be the biggest problem.

My biggest problem was, I couldn't get hard without porn. My ex girlfriend was the first person I ever gave consent to touch and play around with me but I felt absolutely nothing, I didn't feel excitement, it was my girlfriend for gods sake.. i'm supposed to get turned on, I got turned on but no erection. At the time I didn't pay attention to it, but then I realized that's the product of watching too much porn and only masturbating to porn.

I've had about 3-4 relapses. In all honesty for me doing this is one of the hardest things because I don't have a girlfriend, I don't have a good diet, I don't have a proper full time job that will give me consistent income and I don't exercise properly, and I can't afford a diet or a gym membership if I can't get consistent income, i have to rely on my employers calling me back when I call them for a shift. Before hand I realized that whenever I watched porn, i used it as an escape, and when i climaxed I felt like shit, not guilty or shame, but I just felt like utter shit, I kept thinking about past experiences etc..

But when relapsing recently, I realized that rather than using it as an escape and feeling sad, I was feeling happy and that I felt like I needed to get my horniness out of my system. However, I need to stop all together and I need to fix my life up, and I know I will it's just going to take time.

You'll get through it, you were strong enough to do 21 days, I believe you are strong enough to go past that mark and continue to the momentum

 

Exactly. I started out only making it to 14 days, then 20 days, then 30 days. Each time I was motivated a little more to go a little further. And right now I want to quit FOREVER! I pray that I am able to. I NEVER want to look at P again.