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15 + years of fap since age 12?

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by jrob322323, Nov 17, 2018.

  1. Nov 17, 2018 #1
    jrob322323

    jrob322323 Fapstronaut

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    Never had a gf, had preferred masturbating to going out and trying to meet girls/women simply because of conveinience. Ive always liked spending time w women and i havent been a complete recluse, but didnt feel fully into the dating game. It wasnt everyday until i probably hit age 21-22. Since than its been daily or even more than daily. Anyhow ive been trying to stop for 2 weeks. Been having a hard time, but only 3 relapses. Especially initially. Dropping from 2-3x a day to straight nothing i had aches in my testicles. I had to relieve myself. After one week My issue is i noticed is im not so calm and collected around women. I also got back my morning wood after 5-6 days.
    Im still very mentally vested and committed to stopping, but i also know just dropping stuff can be mentally straining. Did anybody else get some symptoms like these? Did anyone try to cut back gradually before going cold turkey?
     
    jrob322323, Nov 17, 2018
    jrob322323, Nov 17, 2018
    #1
  2. Nov 17, 2018 #2
    djentonaut

    djentonaut Fapstronaut

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    I'm in a similar (ish) boat. I'm 28 and have been fapping pretty much daily since I was ~12. I got access to high-speed internet in my teens, so it's probably averaged about 2x/day for the last 10 years or so. I've tried cold turkey multiple times, but always relapse. I'm trying again and, so far, I've gotten in 2 weeks with about 1 pmo round per week. That's a heck of a lot better than before, but the dreams I'm having certainly don't help. I just try to pick up where I left off and make it another week. I figure soon enough, I can chain the weeks together and finally get rid of it. While I'm not 'giving myself permission' to pmo on the weekend, I've taken to viewing it as just a little speed bump in my journey as opposed to a failure and starting over from square 1. Sure, I have to reset my counter, but the piece that really matters is my brain re-wiring itself and I'm sure it's making progress just by going from 2x/day to 1x/week.
     
    djentonaut, Nov 17, 2018
    djentonaut, Nov 17, 2018
    #2
    Dmodee, Romans 6 23, ynnel_ynnek and 1 other person like this.
  3. Nov 17, 2018 #3
    jrob322323

    jrob322323 Fapstronaut

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    100% what you said is alot like how i see this. Before i think cold turkey initially is not realistic, because This is pretty big steps. Ive learned to focus more on change less on results. Cold turkey seems to be to result inspired and unrealistic, as you said Every once in a while will still help Rewire and is progress. I must assume therr will be times where i just feel miserable, it gets kinda scary as times flown since i hit adulthood, and i know it goes faster, i dont wanna be 40 and single. Ive had a rough start to life. Ive overcome addictions to alcohol and ciggarrettes. For the longest time is suspected this to be a problem, but i had also read masturbating is healthy normal and people always told me i have all the time in the world cuz i was young
     
    jrob322323, Nov 17, 2018
    jrob322323, Nov 17, 2018
    #3
  4. Nov 17, 2018 #4
    Dudes_manrod

    Dudes_manrod Fapstronaut

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    I personally think quitting cold-turkey is the way to start, as I find it hard to agree with any acceptance of this habit in 'moderation'. I'm just not convinced intentionally weaning off really works long-term as every day we continue the habit of PMOing we are just carving those mental pathways deeper.

    That being said, maybe in a perfect world after that day we quit we would never even sneak a peak at a stray GIF again until the day we die. But realistically, while we should try our best to be proactive and navigate around potential pitfalls, like you said it can actually be counter-productive to crucify ourselves after every setback. I have a few family members in AA, and I appreciate a motto they have;

    "Progress, not Perfection"
     
    Dudes_manrod, Nov 17, 2018
    Dudes_manrod, Nov 17, 2018
    #4
    jrob322323 likes this.

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