Another El-Masturbator :(

When you feel like your are gonna relapse visit emergency.nofap.com and click on the appropriate section. I prefer to use my phone as I'm generally on it more in public than in private. Good job on starting this journey and know that with help, time, and guidance(of any type) we can beat this.

I too am alone most of the time and prefer to use my phone in front of my apartment so as too keep any urges at a minimum. I know your pain brother it's harder when your a loner and not a social person.

 

Hey mohsin, welcome bro,

I am 20 years old and I've lived a pretty isolated life so far so I can relate a little to your situation. It sounds to me like you are a somewhat religious person talking about Satan (shaitan as you called him, which is the same thing I'm guessing)

So right now you feel like your self control is kind of fucked up.. The way I look at self control is like a muscle. If you haven't had to practice any type of self control or discipline in your life it's hard to get started. Especially if you sit in front of the computer a lot. Usually when I do one 'lazy' activity, which I rationalise by saying it will only be just one, it just goes downhill from there. And I end up wasting a couple of hours.

Look man, if you're jerking off everyday, and because of this challenge you manage to withhold one or two days, you should be proud of that. It's easy to compare yourself to people reaching 300 days or something, but you are NOT them. You are a completely different person, and you've had a different life than them. Be fucking proud, you still jerked off less than you usually do. That is a good accomplishment no matter how you look at it.

Being compassionate with yourself when you do fuck up is a lot better than thinking about how much of a fuck-up you are. If you tell yourself you suck for giving in to the urge you'll feel even worse. And to alleviate those bad feelings it can be tempting to jerk it again.

If you think, 'fuck yeah, I've PMO'd less than usual, even though I gave in now, that fact remains', you can maybe feel some pride. And those good feelings can help to keep going.

I'm really starting to look at this NoFap thing as a lifestyle change. I spend a lot of time in front of the computer and that really doesn't help with staying PMO free. So start doing some small things to change up your life. Go for a walk, join a gym. Start learning and cooking good food.

I think you saying that those tips about people saying 'Don't stay alone' are useless for an addict, is you putting yourself in a victim mindset. Maybe you see yourself as a victim of this big bad porno that's on the internet. That is bullshit! Start seeing it how it really is. Changing your lifestyle is fucking hard. Taking responsibility for your behaviour is fucking hard. Real change is a fucking bitch to accomplish. But don't say to yourself that you are a victim and can't control yourself when the urge is really big.

The fact is, no matter what situation you are in, you have control over your own thoughts and actions. You can choose to go for a walk when the urge is really big. Or sprint your fucking ass off for that matter. Saying you can't control yourself in those situations is setting yourself up for failure.

And to look at it from a religious angle, the snake only talked to Eve to eat the apple, but he never forced her to do something eat it against her will. He just convinced her to do so. And you know it's better to not do it, so don't believe the rationalizations that cross your mind. Make the firm decision to say NO to that fucking noise!!

So that's it bro. Love yourself no matter what happens, and try to change your lifestyle. The things you fear most of doing are probably also the things that would help you the most.

 

Hello mohsinmkg7, nice to meet ya. I also am brand-new here.

A few things stuck out to me when reading your post.

Firstly, I think it's incredibly important to view quitting PMO as a lifestyle change, not just a "lifehack" that will magically eliminate the PMO problem. We've both been looking at porn for three years (or more) sounds like. We've begun a lifestyle of looking at porn. That being the case, we need to develop an entirely NEW lifestyle of NOT looking at porn. There are no lifehacks for this. Our same favorite porn sites will still be there 90 days from now. Reading articles may help at times, going out in public may also help at times, but you are going to need to approach this new lifestyle intelligently, determining what you are going to replace porn with. There's also the possibility that as you refrain from PMO, that self-confidence and adventurism/testosterone will kick in, which will help modify your lifestyle somewhat without you even trying.

Second, I'd encourage you highly to consider this to be a journey. I've began seriously trying to kick PMO for the last year. I had a few decent good runs of 1 month+ without PMO, but I've recently fallen off the wagon in a very bad way. One thing that has helped me get back into the fight was the realization that quitting PMO is a process, not an instantaneous "I'm-not-a-porn-addict-anymore" phenomenon. That realization has helped me immensely because it's allowed me to be more forgiving and understanding of myself when I do occasionally fall. It's not that I completely screwed up and all my progress has been reset to 0, it's that I've hit an unfortunate speed bump in the road. Once I realized that, it made it much easier to continue on.

Thirdly, it seems that you may have some sort of belief in God/a fallen world/corrupt flesh/the-nemesis-of-God-and-all-things-good, Satan (or Shaitan ). I'm not quite sure how much of this you believe in, but I heard a wise man once say that a key in staying right with God lies in how much time you allow to pass between falling (or "sin"), and asking Him for forgiveness. I'm not sure how this aligns with your spirituality, and if it doesn't then I apologize. Just thought I'd mention it since you brought it up.

Cheers mate! Rootin for ya!