Dealing With My Religious Family

I think this is a good perspective and probably true

 

Good, I'm glad I explained it well. Maybe the best bet, to keep a good spirit for your own sake, would be when they try to talk to you about God and its starting to annoy you, just stop for a second and remind yourself that this is love for them. Maybe just say "thank you for loving me, but no, I dont want to go to church with you." Or whatever you feel comfortable with in your own words.

I think that would help everyone in the situation to feel more comfortable, yourself included. To train your mind to remember that they're saying that stuff because they love you and care about you, not because they're judging you.

 

This might be a reality for Christians but for an atheist there is nothing more ridiculous than the concept of hell.

 

I think you didn't get his point at all. If they truly believed that their loved one is on the path to eternal torture, they'd do much more to stop that than posting in a stupid chatroom. This means that either deep inside they feel that the concept of hell is BS or they don't really like SFT that much. I'm betting on the former.

 

Yeah, I understand that. I'm sharing my perspective as a Christian.

There are tons of other reasons people don't share the gospel with as much ferocity as they want to. The biggest one being fear. Fear of being laughed at, mocked, hated, fear of pushing your son further away if you accidentally say the wrong thing at the wrong moment. To say that they must not really believe in hell or must not really love their son if they arent shoving their beliefs down his throat 24/7 is a very narrow minded perspective that doesnt take everything into consideration.

The Bible also says that people arent always ready to receive the gospel, so sometimes it's better to not talk about it 24/7 because it would just push them away. There are tons of reasons people dont do that, and they have nothing to do with them not really believing in God.

I dont want to get into this, because it's going too far off topic, but this is just totally not accurate at all. You dont know what it's like to believe that someone you love is going to suffer for eternity if they dont accept Jesus, but knowing that it's entirely up to them to choose that path and you cant force it, and that if you say the wrong thing and they take it the wrong way, it might push them away even further. It's a lot of pressure, and it's hard to know how you should respond and what you should share and when you should share it. They are only human, doing the best they can.

 

Then perhaps you should re-examine your own beliefs because that is simply insane or evil or both.

 

I respect you trying to understand all sides. That's always a good thing. And yes, it is difficult. Sometimes it's a lot easier to not think about eternity and just try to live my life and not worry about what will happen to the people I love when they die. And many of them would prefer it that way, because people dont want to hear about it. But at the end of the day, if what I believe is real, I have a responsibility to at least tell them what I know and let them decide for themselves. Which is not easy, and often times not very fun if it might result in mocking and rudeness or them not wanting to talk to me anymore.

Everyone has struggles in life, worries and fears, and we are all just doing our best. I think we could all, myself included, use to remember grace more often and try to see other people's perspective.

 

You're welcome to believe that. I disagree, but I'm not being disrespectful about it.

 

I’m not being disrespectful, I’m being rational. Your own beliefs are contradictory. The deity you worship is supposedly merciful and loves all of his “creations” but if you don’t believe in him you are destined to an eternity of fire? Enjoy your mental gymnastics, I’m going to stick with reality.

 

I wish I could trade with you, I have a far left family who act like they would burst into a ball of flames if they crossed the threshold of a Church on my dad's side, and on my mom's side a group that believe that if you post a couple of Facebook messages, and physically own a Bible, you are a devout Christian. I wish I didn't sit alone at Church while my family is at home. I wish growing up that they would have given me a ride, rather then having me cross freeways on foot to get to Church.

 

In my family, replace "the gospel" with "unbelief", and then it would accurately describe my life.

That's a good way to look at it, and quite a radical way of looking at things, in certain religious circles

This is how it makes sense to me too

Yeah I think we have something in common then, even though circumstances look different

 

If a single member of my family were to go to Church with me, or help me with my voulenteer work at the local food bank, and community meals, I would probably weep for joy. I don't see that happy day ever happening however.

 

Another thought that bothers me is that my family is invested in my not doing well, so that I will thereby turn to God or something. Certainly that's been a temptation for me in the past, when in reality, for me, it's just a symptom

 

Dont give up hope! Keep praying for your family. I have a cousin who was the firmest, God-despising atheist I had ever known for years, and now he is a believer. It's never too late or too hard for God.

What do you mean exactly? Is this just something you feel, or something they have expressed to you?

 

I will say, from my perspective, I never want to see the ones I love in pain. However, I also believe that temporary suffering on earth is nothing compared to what hell brings. So if someone I love has to endure tragedy in order to save their soul for eternity, I believe that would be worth it. That's not at all to dismiss their pain, but its just logic of time. Our short lives on earth are so tiny in the scope of eternity.

It's like a child enduring the pain of putting their hand on something hot, only to now know to avoid that pain in the future and spend the rest of their life free of that suffering. That initial pain of touching the hot thing is nothing in the grand scheme of things. That's a poor analogy, but it's the first that came to mind.

I hope that doesnt sound callous. I'm just trying to explain my own perspective, which might be similar to your family's, so maybe we can all understand each other better.

 

Kind of like the Prodigal son of Luke 15: that you'll go through enough to "come to your senses"?
I am speaking as a Christian myself, just a FYI.