My story.. Horrible story

Hey man, you came to the right place. Everyone in here is broken including myself and we're here to support you in your fight against porn addiction. I know you will get you're family back, but you must try to quit this destructive addiction once and for all. Best of luck!

 

So sorry to hear about all this. Time to rebuild the trust. Covenant eyes has accountability reports so your wife or a friend can have a full report of all your online activity.

I would also reccomend getting involved in a church or mens group. You need to show how serious you are about changing for good.

Keep us posted with your recovery

 

To win her back... focus on yourself.
Eradicate PMO from your life and build a healthy body and mind. Don't tell her you've changed SHOW her and in time maybe things will improve.
If your marriage cannot be saved at least you will have improved yourself enabling you to devote time and energy to your kids.
You got this...

 

Hi mate. Your story is the same pretty much as mine accept I am about 5 years younger. I wasn't found out I told my wife. Fast forward two years and I am almost off porn. I haven't been to a maasage place since 2016. You gotta own your issues. Accept she will be pissed (that is an understatement). Now start dealing with things you can control. Start working on yourself and your self improvement. Get an AP. Start journalling. Replace the bad habits with healthy releases and activities. You're not alone. This is NOT unique to you heaps of us have been through similar experiences and what you have done doesn't reflect your values or who you are as a person. Pick yourself up, improve yourself and your life for you and your family.

It's out in the open now. It can't get worse. Get back up. Get support and own your recovery.

Welcome to the forums and your recovery.

 

Baby steps mate. First goal should be to stay away from massage and cybersex. The rest will come in time. Don't get disheartened when you have a setback. You only fail when you stop trying to quit. Not many smokers quit on their first attempt and it is likely you wont either.

 

If you have young children you and your wife have no right to end the marriage because it will harm your child.

 

Hey dude - congrats on hitting rock bottom. This is your opportunity to either make the most of a horrible situation and change your life forever, or slowly fall into oblivion. Her feelings are valid, you have to respect them.

Also congrats on posting - I am going to help you short circuit years of pain and you will do everything I tell you to do (PS - Trying hard to quit is my Accountability Partner (AP) - you will go find an APtoo in this forum).

Now onto action you can take.

1) Start reading this shit. Yes there are a lot of words, but this will save you years of effort. These words are wise - you can not manage your emotions - you cannot mange your life. You must accept that, and begin
http://www.recoverynation.com/recovery/recovery_workshop_contents.php

Here is my journal
http://www.recoverynation.com/phpBB3/viewtopic.php?f=13&t=25204

NoFap is great, but this site has very specific steps you can and must take to heal. These exercises alone will take potentially years off your recovery. You can pay them for help too, or do the whole thing for free.

2) start educating yourself. This guys is amazing. Listen to this entire series. I am about 2/3 rds though

http://podbay.fm/show/1384701024

Go read all the shit here

https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/

3) If you slip up - investigate the reason why - write it down here, but do not just go back to old habits.

4) Go to the AP forum here and find an AP.

Good luck bro - you are going to do this shit for yourself ok? Not for anyone else - you are an amazing, unique and are a very special human - there is no one like you, two wonderful humans are relying on you to be the best version of yourself. You are important.

 

i agree, the kids interest should be put first. I believe you are on the right track, finding this website and putting your story out like this shows it. You can put things back together man.

 

Sorry - this is really bad, unhelpful advice.

He can't control what his wife is going to do. She certainly has the RIGHT to end the marriage - how about the harm staying around would do to the kids if she stayed hated him for sleeping with escorts?

Think about that - years of resentment, the kids living through the pain.

What are you trying to say - he should march up to his wife and say " you can't leave me, we have kids, you must stay and deal with my sexual issues, even if that means you are not happy, and are feeling like I have betrayed our sacred bond?"

Based on your ideological advice I am going to guess you are religious and have no kids.

 

Well done for taking the first step!
You know you need to change brother. This sounds corny but try be the best version of yourself. Read more, train/exercise more, try meet new positive people, avoid negative sensationalised news stories etc
I’ve done these things and have improved every month.

 

Hi mate, well done in making it to day 5, you should be really proud.

Great work on booking in a session. My advice is to ask them if they have experience dealing with this issue.

There is a lot misinformed info about dealing with p addiction.

They should also help u discover and resolve core issues leading to you acting out.

 

This is solid advice.

 

You've hit rock bottom mate, there's only one way now. Build yourself from the ground up. Goodluck to you, must be a fucking rough spot, you will get through this.