Just completed 90 days - here's my Top 10 Tip List

Thanks Sunshine, you are one of the ones who have blazed the way for others. Best, SF

 

Here is an interesting article on pornography. I hope I don't offend anyone by posting this. But, it's time we seriously take a look at the devastation of pornography.

http://www.sott.net/article/292680-...pornography-reveals-societys-moral-bankruptcy

And, I'll quote from the article here, which references a quote from Gail Dines, author of "Pornland: How Porn Has Hijacked Our Sexuality"

"The porn industry has hijacked the sexuality of an entire culture and is laying waste to a whole generation of boys," she warned. "And when you lay waste to a generation of boys, you lay waste to a generation of girls."

"When you fight porn you fight global capitalism," she said. "The venture capitalists, the banks, the credit card companies are all in this feeding chain. This is why you never see anti-porn stories. The media is implicated. It is financially in bed with these companies. Porn is part of this. Porn tells us we have nothing left as human beings—boundaries, integrity, desire, creativity and authenticity. Women are reduced to three orifices and two hands. Porn is woven into the corporate destruction of intimacy and connectedness, and this includes connectedness to the earth. If we were a society where we were whole, connected human beings in real communities, then we would not be able to look at porn. We would not be able to watch another human being tortured."


NoFap = taking your life back. Do your best and keep trying. If you are weak - get strong. If you are strong - stay strong. If you reached the goal - stay vigilant.

The clock is ticking, if you haven't already, get K9 or another porn blocker and make a vow not to look at pornography ever again.

We're here to help each other. Best to everyone. SF

 

Hi all,

Thought I would write a post at going on 140 days. Last time I wrote was around the 100 day mark. Looking back at that post, I must have felt either fragile or cautiously optimistic about “staying strong.” I must say, going at 140 days, this NoFap process is going even smoother. The patterns of pre-NoFap are becoming like smaller images in a rear-view mirror. However, I am still dealing with some negative memories of the past that do arise. But, I am even more grateful and humbled that I feel like I have moved on and have no desire to fall back into the “fap trap”. So, basically, things have changed quite a bit even since day 90 and 100. In fact, I found the days around 90 and 100 to be somewhat difficult. I think part of my mind wanted a re-bound moment at that time to fall backwards, but it certainly did not happen.

I don’t have too much to share other than this process is worth it and I feel more integrated as a human than ever before. And, I am looking forward to getting even more time under my belt.

Best to you all. Stay strong. SF

 

NoFap and Spirituality.

There is so much more to this NoFap assignment than just NoFap. Docker asked me to write a few words in his post about spirituality, which I am re-posting and sharing the link below.

This post may relate to what the younger guys call “super-powers”. They go offline for a few weeks, practice celibacy for a few days, and they begin to experience themselves and the world in a whole new light. Some get depressed at first, but eventually life begins to flow in a slightly different manner. It may be part of the process of waking up.

“This entire concept of “NoFap”, whether people realize it or not, is a spiritual process. It’s about un-doing and un-becoming. It’s an attempt to get back to a more natural, original state. A state that through discipline we actually become freer. Spirituality is about unity and integration of self. It’s about healing the fractured elements of ourselves. We can no longer have the working Scott, the sensually-addicted Scott, the family-guy Scott, the spiritual Scott. There is only room for one person. So, through NoFap we attempt to heal this. We attempt to shift away from compulsions and addictions and thoughtless thoughts that have taken us further away from who we really are. NoFap is a step in the right direction to becoming who we ought to be. Then, we may come to a day where internal divine love begins to flow, because we are no longer tied down to these fractured elements of our personality that have kept true love from flowing.”

Here is the link to Docker’s thread:
http://www.nofap.com/forum/showthread.php?31580-Spirituality-increased

Best SF

 

How do you know you are re-booted?

From my experience, the re-boot has two components: The first is physical and the second is mental and emotional.

During the reboot, I found that a certain amount of time had to happen so that I became physically distanced from negative patterns. My brain got to a point where it did not have the dopamine and other chemical cravings associated with this type of self-abuse. Looking back, there were withdrawals - craving, urges, depression, high-energy, low-energy, flat-lines. When this all begins to stabilize, then the re-boot is starting to kick in. When this became stable, then I felt I was physically re-booted.

On a mental and emotional state, three things are required to be fully re-booted: awareness, confidence and vigilance. When you go through situations that may have been a trigger in the past (relationship issues, work stress, alone time, boredom, human rhythms and cycles) and we are aware of them and confident that we won't relapse, then we are mentally and emotionally rebooted. If you are still dealing with some fragileness, self-doubt, fear of relapse, anxiety about that current challenge, then there is work to continue.

Vigilance is required at all times, because over-confidence – particularly at a point early in the re-boot – can cause a downward spiral. Also, memory relapses can happen. You may think, "oh I feel like doing such and such" - forgetting everything you have just struggled through - which may be the start of a relapse trigger. This we have experienced and read about in almost every NoFap post. Vigilance is required. Vigilance is always required.

I think this can take longer than 90 days and likely depends on the person and their own personality, past, etc. As I have stated in previous posts, I feel much different at day 140 than at 100. I would say at this state, even though my past negative behaviors feel like distant objects, there is still some healing that is taking place. I am at a much better place, but confidence is still evolving as I fully experience situations which may have been problems areas before the re-boot.

There is one guarantee – that there will be potential trigger situations that arise in the present and the future. If we go through them with full awareness, confidence and vigilance, then we will seize the moment and the day!

Good stuff. SF