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I can't Ejaculate during sex.

Discussion in 'Compulsive Sexual Behavior' started by Revof, Jan 24, 2019.

  1. Revof

    Revof Fapstronaut

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    I'm an addict, I still do watch porn and masturbate once in a while, I didn't go through the reset thing, I have a girlfriend and trying to reset will be hard because she will want to have sex ... I don't find it hard getting aroused (erection) and also I do like the sex but I won't ejaculate, sometimes I do feel it coming and then I will lose it ... After my girlfriend is satisfied she may let me masturbate touching her and I will ejaculate. Now this is really frausting I want to have the normal sex and ejaculate and I want to stop masturbation and porn for life ... Please help.
     
  2. Revof

    Revof Fapstronaut

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    Anyone one going through this ?
     
  3. diesel2256

    diesel2256 Fapstronaut

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    Obviously, stop doing this.

    And stop doing this. If you didn't get off while having sex, then too bad for you. Better luck next time.

    Your brain knows it'll get that deathgrip MO at the end of sex, so it isn't interested in the actual sex part.
     
    Revof and Optimum Fortitude like this.
  4. This is not medical advice so seek a doctors help.

    I have seen it somewhere that you should drink more water and have a healthy diet so your body can make sperm.

    .try having sex less often so you can get a build up.

    I found slippery elm at a health food shop mixed with water can restore more normal sexual function. Or st johns wort if you are a bit depressed,. (See your doctor about interaction with other medicines)

    Keep off drugs and alcohol.

    Reduce stress eg meditation and prayer.
     
    Revof likes this.
  5. You’ve got to rewire your brain and how it responds to sex.
    As a p addict you’ve trained yourself to get off to endless beautiful women and your hand.
    You have a girlfriend but can’t finish with her because you’re brain equates sex with masturbation.
    After she has finished you then masturbate, probably close your eyes and visualize a porn scene while touching her. This is really unhealthy.

    Quit the porn and in time you will notice a world of a difference.
     
    Revof and Optimum Fortitude like this.
  6. ultrafabber

    ultrafabber Fapstronaut

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    Yes, i had the exact same thing. In fact, real sex did not feel real at all, it felt like a different type of masturbation.

    I had been masturbating since 12, that is almost 20 years. From the age of 12 to 20 I had no sex, just masturbation. After starting sex life, i still masturbated way more than I had had actual sex. Overall I would estimate that over 90% of my "sex" experience is from masturbating. So basically i grew up with wanking and ejaculating into nothingness being standard and sex and ejaculating in/on a woman being the exception.

    I am certain that for many masturbation/porn addicts it's basically the same story. That being said, it's expected that ejaculating with a woman feels weird because we literally conditioned ourselves for something entirely different.

    You need to stop all self stimulation (sex fantasizing, porn, masturbation etc). And just have sex. Over time you will get your normal/natural state back.
     
    Revof and Deleted Account like this.
  7. shameandguilt

    shameandguilt Fapstronaut

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    Interesting... I have the opposite problem. I ejaculate to early when having sex.
    I don't know however if my problem is porn induced or if i'm hypersexual. I think it is porn induced after years of masturbating.

    But both our solutions are the same - quit watch porn, so you can ejaculate when having sex.
     
    Revof likes this.
  8. Ajar

    Ajar Fapstronaut
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    But if you don't like finish with her, doesn't she like that? I'm pretty sure more of us have the problem of finishing too soon rather than too late.

    All I'm saying, enjoy your reboot.
     
    Warrior177 and Revof like this.
  9. Uncomfortably Numb

    Uncomfortably Numb Fapstronaut

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    If only I had discovered NoFap earlier... my addiction and failure to climax no doubt contributed to the break up of my marriage...
    Act now… don't let this happen to you
     
    Revof, FreeyaMind and ultrafabber like this.
  10. Newpire

    Newpire Fapstronaut

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    delayed ejaculation from death grip.
     
    Revof likes this.
  11. Revof

    Revof Fapstronaut

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    Thanks to everyone who contributed to this post, I have start ejaculating (climax) during sex .. I stop watching porn, masturbation and I try to be present (mindful) during sex, Though I still do feel like watching porn and masturbating when I'm bored or sad but I have been able to hold myself by asking myself if I would prefer to watch porn and masturbation and have bad health, erectile disfunction, no climax during sex, low self-esteem and all sorts, i don't ever want to masturbate again and I won't. Once again thanks to every one who contributed to this post you have All being helpful. Thanks.
     
    Warrior177 likes this.
  12. Warrior177

    Warrior177 Fapstronaut

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    Well... No it is not....
    If it is a one night stand ok, she will say to her friends that you're like a sex athlete..


    But, in a long term relationship, she will start wondering if the issue is not her, of she isn't good enough...

    But other hand, if you come too soon, it is because you love sex with her so much that you can't hold it in.

    Besides, having her man ejaculate is like the point in having sex for most girls


     
    Nathan4 likes this.
  13. Warrior177

    Warrior177 Fapstronaut

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    So it took one week only for you to be able so ejaculate again??
     
  14. @rm0uR

    @rm0uR Fapstronaut

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    Another case where I don't know what's to complain about. If you can stay erect and last so long, what is the problem?
    All I can say is stop PMO. But clearly that doesn't have an effect on your performance during intercourse.
    I hear multiple stories of guys that wish they could orgasm but can't and then also they that wish they wouldn't, but do. There's a constant inconsistency.
     

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