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I'm 22 and don't know what the hell to do with my life anymore

Discussion in 'Off-topic Discussion' started by Nick:3, Jan 21, 2019.

  1. Nick:3

    Nick:3 Fapstronaut

    I'm 22 on a Concept art degree, and have no idea what I want to do anymore. Nothing really seems to inspire me a lot, and I feel quite tired and depressed a lot of the time. I feel that my degree isn't worth much, and that I am not interested in it a lot any more, because I get restless when trying to do the art work for it.

    Also I've done martial arts and meditation for a while now (2-3 years) and used to love drawing and artistic stuff, but it seems to be boring now. The idea of sitting down and drawing for hours on end seems to be dreadful now (sometimes I enjoy it). As for nofap, well I almost succeeded doing it for the whole of last year (I failed in the last month or 2 depending on what you classify as failing).

    I basically have no idea what my purpose is, I don't enjoy where I live, be it at home or at uni (I live in England), and was thinking of dropping my degree (I'm in second year) and just moving to America.

    If anyone has any ideas on what I should do, I'd love to hear them, and if you can relate to me, you can comment or pm me to join me on the journey of self discovery :).
     
  2. MLMVSS

    MLMVSS Fapstronaut

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    You can always work towards teaching this.
     
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  3. I dont think this is a good idea in your current frame of mind. I think you would be doing that expecting it to fix all your problems, and it wont. You'll still be the same person with the same interests and problems, just in a different place.

    I'm not sure I have much advice for you, other than to just keep looking into and trying different hobbies and meeting new people and maybe travelling. Also, maybe taking some kind of career aptitude test or sitting down with a career counselor would be a good idea. You can discuss what you're good at, where your strengths are, and what you enjoy, and they can help you figure out some career options that would be good for you.

    Another good way to change perspective is to give back. Volunteer, help people less fortunate. That will take your focus off of yourself and your own purpose and put it on others, and that might spark something.

    Artistic fields can often ebb and flow and interest can fade, especially when you try to turn it into a job. I'm a writer, and personally, I think I would get really sick of writing if I was forced to do it for hours every day and take classes on it. But when I have my own freedom, I love doing it. When the pressure isnt there, it's fun. So maybe try to remind yourself that art is something you love, and you want to keep it that way. It's such a special thing to have something you love doing, especially when that something is creating. You dont want to lose that by forcing the idea of making money off of it. Personally, I would rather not make any money off of my books than be in a position where I no longer enjoy writing and it doesnt bring me joy.

    Another good thing to remember is that a LOT of people feel the same way you are feeling at your age. I know I did. I went to college for two years, then quit when I got married, moved out of my parents house which was a huge change for me. I really missed my mother a lot, as I was used to being able to just walk into the other room and hang out with her whenever I wanted. I felt lonely and depressed and I had no idea what I was doing with my life. But then I started my own business doing something I didnt necessarily love but was good at, and it became pretty successful. I also wrote my first book and decided to get serious about being an author, and since then I now have almost finished a second book, and I have a YouTube channel where I talk about writing and books, and I've found an awesome community of friends there.

    The point is, I didnt see any of that stuff when I was your age (which was only a few years ago), and now here I am, happier than ever, more fulfilled than ever, with hobbies and joy and a job that I love. You never know what can happen!
     
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  4. Dimmed_haze

    Dimmed_haze Fapstronaut

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    First of all, can you repurpose your degree to IT/STEM or something? I learned that you should go to college PURELY for the money. Don't fall for the "choose what you like/any degree is a good degree!" bs.

    Me being 21 and stupid, I dropped out of my first year of IT and had 2 years of complications after it, I fell for the "do what you love trap".

    But don't lose hope. Hang in there. Accept that LIFE FUCKIN SUCKS MAN.

    Once you've done that, ask yourself. What is it you want? Me personally; I hate being around most people in the corporate or college feminized world of deceptions. I don't want to waste away my life in a 9-5 cubicle, talking about mundane shit and having to act like I love my job. Having to wake 7 am and sitting in public transport with people that have the look of exhaustion.

    You know what I want? Sitting around a campfire, with TRUE friends. Be strong in mind and body, and do whatever I want to do, whenever I want to. And for that I need what's called "fuck you money".

    Personally for me, what I realise is. I'm not tired of life. I'm tired of having a SHIT life. You want to go to America? What are you expecting to be different from the UK? I believe with travelling you will learn to know yourself. But make sure to not cut your, future or current, financial stability.

    Learn the trappings of getting a mortgage/student loans and spending all the money you earn on stuff you don't need. Be a minimalist, of course you can spend on fun. But keep it in budget. Debt is a shackle.

    There is no hope, I like Aaron Clarey's views on this. Once you accept that, and build your life, you can find a true purpose. To escape the sheep's game, is hard. You will have to move forward, it's better than being stuck.



    Go to 10:30 ish min, if you want to go to the point I want to make.

    And honestly, that is a hard thing to do. That empty feeling in my chest haunts me every day. I don't care about anything either. Heck, I'd be happy to live in a small house on my own. But even that is a fortune these days. It probably would be very lonely aswell. Oh well, I wish we can find something at least.

    I don't agree with everything Aaron says or does, his views on religion aren't like mine(skip it if you want). He tends to be quite harsh sometimes. But I think he means well.
     
    Last edited: Jan 22, 2019
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  5. Maybe you are in a flatline
     
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  6. The Wrestler

    The Wrestler Fapstronaut

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    Finding out what you really want to do is hard, I feel you. What is the best choice for you today? Then tomorrow, ask yourself the same question. Talking some things over with a counsellor might be a good idea. What uni are you at? I'll find some names for you.
     
    Nick:3 likes this.
  7. EthanW.

    EthanW. Fapstronaut

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    I think start working toward self-sufficiency, as others suggested. I do think moving could help your mind refocus away from the negative aspects of your current situation.

    I think you should drop the degree, unless you have financial consequences that would saddle you with harsh liabilities, like debt. Otherwise, if you have to, bite the bullet and finish school. Then, move if you really want -- if it's financially feasible -- get a job and start saving to make something that's your own. Use experience from working to help you focus on skills that will make you successful in the career you set for yourself.

    That's my advice.

    Oh, and DON'T WASTE YOUR LIFE WITH CRAPPY JOBS. Don't be content to spend twenty years in mediocrity to end up retiring at $14 an hour. Get any job at first, whether it's 6 months or 2 years, but gear your mind toward self-sufficiency via self-employment as much as is possible. Side hustles, too.
     
    Nick:3 likes this.
  8. yaaarp

    yaaarp Fapstronaut

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    If it helps, I'm 38 and still have no idea what I want to be when I grow up...

    I'm actually being half serious. I did a law degree, and then at the end realised I hated the idea of being a lawyer. I eventually ended up falling into a career that I relatively enjoy and uses my degree, but only in my late 20s. Not knowing what you want to do with your life isn't the end of the world; just think of it as being free to explore all the options open to you rather than thinking of it as just a narrow path you have to follow.
     
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  9. EthanW.

    EthanW. Fapstronaut

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    I think young people should be careful with that sentiment. I've seen "man boys" who just float from job to job, who spend their leisure deep into their hobbies, and I think the reason is because they become content with always exploring.

    Explore for a set amount of time, but start thinking about hard boundaries for your future, such as a career and a home.
     
    Nick:3 likes this.
  10. I'm the same, I'm an adult but no idea what I want to do but i'm happy with that, your young bro go travelling round Europe live a little
     
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  11. Marik757

    Marik757 Fapstronaut

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    I have no idea what I'm doing ha. I got a degree in computer science, a year of schooling in culinary, and 4 years of military service under my belt. Still cant find any interest in life...

    Dad told me to go marry a military woman so I sit at home and figure out my life. But that runs me the wrong way..

    Too many things going on in the world. You have to be politically correct now these days. Just dont get brainwashed by the news media.
     
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  12. Nick:3

    Nick:3 Fapstronaut

    Thanks very much to everyone who's replied on this forum thread, I appreciate it. I may not love what I do atm, sometimes I may dread it, other times I may be inspired, but for now whilst I'm at uni I'm gonna give it my all, and decide what to do at the end of my second year here.

    I am going to meditate and become more present as well.
     
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