This is the End of my Addiction

Once again I relapsed. I masturbated in bed this morning and I PMOd later on. I am finally putting an end to this addiction. I'm so sick of it. I want to live life the way I did before I became addicted to masturbation and pornography. PMOing is such a waste of time. Nothing good comes out of it except for 10 seconds of pleasure. Those 10 seconds of pleasure are not worth all the frustration and disappointment I face after relapsing. This addiction has caused so many problems in my life. It's had many negative effects on me. It's caused me to develop social anxiety, depression, and obsessive compulsive disorder. I hate living with these mental illnesses and after every relapse they get worse. This addiction has also caused me to become lazy and procrastinate. Another negative effect my addiction had on me is it's caused me to have difficulty concentrating and paying attention. This effect has made school very difficult. My addiction also lowered my overall confidence and self-esteem. I want to beat this addiction and become the person I want to be. If I beat this addiction I will become truly happy. To beat this addiction I have to keep busy, exercise regularly, and take cold showers. The most important thing is having the ability to say no when I want to PMO. It doesn't matter that I relapsed in the past. I can't change the past. What I can do is put an end to my addiction and turn my life around. That's what I will do. I refuse to be controlled by porn and masturbation any longer. This is the end of my addiction. Today is Monday, February 16th, 2015 and I will never masturbate or view pornography again.