35 y/o - VIRGIN - Depressed - PIED!

I wouldnt bother trying to actually have a conversation. 4 minutes, haha wtf.
The only thing i would ask if she has any lifegoals and whether she has accomplished any of them. Probably too much already.
Probably best to just be honest and acknowledge how awkward this situation is you guys actively put yourself in

 

Good luck! Since you never have any time, here are some suggestions that don't require a lot of time to ask and answer, but gives you a hint what kind of person she is, if you don't want to talk about her last meal.

Why are smurfs not colored in magenta?
What is your most treasured memory?
For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
If you choke a smurf, do they turn into a different color? (stolen from Jeff Dunham

In the end it doesn't matter what you are talking about. Listen to your favorite upbeat!! music before you go and try to be honest and sincere, and tease her a bit as well if you get the chance. In fact, tease her as much as you can : )

 

Good luck, hope it goes well! You're doing good by doing this!

 

hi you have on 115 day but seeming no confidence why???

 

virgin mean??? i mean if we masturbate so how can we say we are virgin???

 

Virgin meaning never had sex with another person. Where are you from?

 

Nofap doesn't solve everyone's life problems all at once. It's just a part of solving them.

Therefore, the number technically means nothing. People can feel better and have a better life with no counter or a low number then someone who has a rediculously high number like 12.
If anything, it is a commitment indicator.

 

Ok i am out of ideas mate. You really sound like you need professional help. You should see a doctor and to him about it, in all honesty. You seem to be in an actual depression and i don't think this forum by itself is able to lift you out of that.
I really wish i could but it just far exceeds my uplifting capabilities.
Please... if you want to have a shot, go see a doc

 

Slow process my friend! Remember, you can do this!

 

Is it the fact that you're not getting any matches from speed-dating that is triggering your depression?

 

Dating is weird man. Don't let it bother you. I lived in a city once and got no dates for 8 months. In the 9th month, I met someone, started dating, visited her family, but then we broke up thanks to PIED BS. So you never know when things will work out for you.

 

Yeah it really sounds like you are depressed, because based on your posts and what you just said, it actually sounds like you are doing and have done a lot of really positive things with self-improvement, including the speed-dating, your NoFap streak, gym, and diet. You have a lot to be proud of! But your depression is not letting you see those as positives. Don't let your depression trash all the progress you've made. Are you on meds? If not, that might help

I'm not an expert on dating or women by any means. However it sounds like you're too attached to the outcome of the speed-dating and getting "likes", and then when you don't you start to feel sorry for yourself. The girls can probably sense that! I have been there! The speed-dating sounds like an awesome step for you, but it seems like you might be putting all your eggs in that basket. Seriously I highly recommend Meetup groups, where you can make friends, have fun, and meet women!

By the way I also work with people with mental health issues too, it is hard stressful work. So you take care of other people's mental health, but you can't forget your own!

 

Whoa....this is heavy and sounds like you are taking a nose-bomb quickly. I have so much to say, I may have to come back to post as I have plans soon...
the first and most important thing is that you are putting WAY too much emphasis on sex and a GF. This will never happen if you don't change your perspective and your approach. Most women will not consider sex with someone if they have no intimate emotional connection with a partner. You need to work on developing interpersonal relationships in general first if you want any intimacy and then sex...
This depression NEEDS to be addressed and treated for you to improve. See a medical provider ASAP for this and to check for low T, because if the T is not low, it has nothing to do with your problems, your mind is...

 

Seriously try Meetup! I ran in to the same problem where I didn't have any friends, there's things I wanted to do, but I didn't have anyone to do them with. Now I'm doing all those fun things every weekend!

Finding a hobby or hobbies would be good. I'm working on that too. I think that should be another step in your self-improvement.

Also.... I think you need to change your username and your avatar on here, seriously. Change how you see yourself. With depression, you have to force yourself to be positive even if that's not how you feel. Do positive affirmations. Really I think you're not doing too bad overall man, you have hope!

 

Stay strong mate! Get help as it'll be worth it. Take a step back and see the bigger picture. Add positives to your life to create positive vibes. Keep trying. You have a lot of positive going on and just need to build on it. The age factor makes us nervous but it shouldn't bro. I know folks who got married after 35 and have a happy married life and kids. I know this one dude who got married at 48 (wife was 30)! So stay strong man. Please stay strong! You are part of the forum and family and we care about your well being!