Extreme tastes in porn led to loss of interest in sex and ED.

jevans99 · Feb 17, 2019

I'm 19 years old and I've watched porn since I was around 11. Much like a drug, as time went on I found I needed more and more to get the same excitement. I found my tastes in porn becoming more violent. It didn't help that I was going through social anxiety issues in my life that were causing me to feel frustrated and angry. I began to associate sexual pleasure with humiliation and suffering. I started watching videos from Kink that were a bizarre mixture of sex and light 'torture' (whipped, caned, vibrated and fucked all while tied up and helpless). I liked seeing the beautiful women being degraded. But it was clear that what I was seeing on that website was consensual and even enjoyable for the women, and after some more time it began to bore me just like vanilla sex. I wanted to see real exploitation. This is when things became very shameful for me. I started to watch videos under the 'forced' category on xvideos. I could tell the videos weren't real but at least seemed somewhat believable. For months I would get my rocks off to this stuff, but I didn't feel a desire to carry out any of the acts myself in real life. In real life I had empathy for women and wished them no harm, but when I watched porn I would see them as playthings deserving of the cruelest humiliations. I felt very uncomfortable inside knowing that what I was indulging myself in was morally wrong, but another concerning effect was that I was beginning to develop erectile dysfunction. A few months ago I found myself in the first relationship I'd been in since I was 17. As the girl had quite a high sex drive I found myself under pressure to keep her happy for fear she would leave or cheat on me otherwise. However on most of the occassions we had sex I found I could never get very hard. Sometimes I could get hard enough to put it in and then it would be ok after that, but some other times I would get anxious under pressure and couldn't get it in. I worried for ages and did research trying to find out what could be the problem. Then I realised that I can and often do get fully hard, when I was watching the porn I chose to watch. Through years of using porn I had found ways to enjoy it which are more pleasurable than sex and sex just wasn't exciting to me anymore because of it. Now I've realised that I may be able to enjoy sex a whole lot more and recover from ED if I abstain from porn. I wanted to post this to find out if anyone has had a similar problem and was able to recover from it. If you've made it this far, thank you for reading. Have a blessed day!

Monarch77 · Feb 17, 2019

I would bet most of us on here reached the point where porn was more enjoyable than the real thing and thus expirianced porn induced ED, myself included, so I can tell you that absolutely if you abstain from it and allow enough time for your mind and body to recover, you'll bounce back to normal. Understand though that rewiring can take some time, especially coming down from more extreme tastes (because they give such a stronger kick), so don't get upset if you don't see results right away, they will come if you hold steady, and you'll probably notice other positive changes come with it.

I also strayed into some of the more extreme kinds of porn and had terrible social anxiety and other issues for so long, and somehow never put the two together. Since being able to really walk away from porn and the weight of feeling ashamed of messed up stuff I was looking at, I have so much more confidence and really am a happier, better person. Trust me, it's worth it.

BigOne79 · Feb 17, 2019

Monarch77 said: ↑

I would bet most of us on here reached the point where porn was more enjoyable than the real thing and thus expirianced porn induced ED, myself included, so I can tell you that absolutely if you abstain from it and allow enough time for your mind and body to recover, you'll bounce back to normal. Understand though that rewiring can take some time, especially coming down from more extreme tastes (because they give such a stronger kick), so don't get upset if you don't see results right away, they will come if you hold steady, and you'll probably notice other positive changes come with it.

I also strayed into some of the more extreme kinds of porn and had terrible social anxiety and other issues for so long, and somehow never put the two together. Since being able to really walk away from porn and the weight of feeling ashamed of messed up stuff I was looking at, I have so much more confidence and really am a happier, better person. Trust me, it's worth it.[/QUOTE
I feel that the more I stay away, now at 4 months, now I am feeling better about myself as well and getting the confidence back as well. The first couple of months were really horrible though. I am always leery about the relapse coming back but I think more time and I will really get rid of all the symptoms I have.

Did you have a lot of PAWS symptoms in the first six months like others have..
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LilD · Feb 17, 2019

I've ended up watching similar stuff (and some other weird genres) during the last few years. I've had my first and only sexual encounter last year (I'm 30+ yo now) and couldn't get hard at all. I was too nervous and it was probably in the middle on a flatline period. (Beggars can't be choosers, I had that one and only chance to have sex with that woman.)

NoFap was the only thing that motivated me enough to get out of my comfort zone to actually have any relationships. (I asked that woman out after I started my reboot.) Before that, I was so socially awkward, shy, and depressed, I couldn't even think about asking a girl out, not to mention having relationships or sex.

Monarch77 · Feb 17, 2019

Hell ya I did lol. I was miserable living through what ended up being a nearly year long flatline and honestly I don't know how I did it. Looking back I know I could have done things differently that would have probably brought me out of it sooner, but interestingly, even though I've relapsed since then I have never had a flatline period like that ever again, thankfully, so I'm glad I was able to push through.

BigOne79 · Feb 18, 2019

Monarch77 said: ↑

Hell ya I did lol. I was miserable living through what ended up being a nearly year long flatline and honestly I don't know how I did it. Looking back I know I could have done things differently that would have probably brought me out of it sooner, but interestingly, even though I've relapsed since then I have never had a flatline period like that ever again, thankfully, so I'm glad I was able to push through.
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Outstanding post Monarch! Thank you for your help on this board. It is a long time to wait a year for flatline to relieve itself but I truly commend you for your strong recovery. I myself am about four months and hoping for a quick recovery from PIED myself. I was wondering, since I am getting into a relationship, did you recover without exercise and any intimate relationship.

When about did libido come back or PIED vanish. I firmly believe that PIED is tied to the anxiety and stress in our minds breaking form the porn and having to find another dopamine release. I am working on quelching the anxiety and the exercise should help that out right away. Mediation should work as well..

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Extreme tastes in porn led to loss of interest in sex and ED.

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