Instagram ——— Good idea or Terrible?

My husband used Insta in his addiction, and in our relationship and house if he used it for addiction it's gone forever. No need to reactivate any addict wires in the brain, so they are gone. Plus social media is a waste of time and can be just as addictive in itself.

If he wants to look at F1 cars, tell him to download the F1 app where he can see the videos of the actual race car drivers racing, and get F1 news. My husband is a huge car guy and has the app so he is content with cars and the internet at the moment.

An addict, is an addict, is an addict. We are all individual humans but the wires that are liked to the addiction (porn, insta and other p-subs, certain places, movies, etc.) are linked to the addiction. Yes, time can change it, but why risk it? If an addict is serious about recovery they don't want those things back and they don't want to risk it because they know full well how damaging those things were to them in the past.

My husband and I have talked many times about the things he left behind when he got into recovery and there are things he might miss but he doesn't necessarily want them back. He never wants to be pulled back into PMO.

 

Yeah, PA is dangerous. People kill themselves over the shame from what they have viewed. People get depressed and hate themselves over what they've seen.... this addiction (or "overuse") kills. It kills the soul, the spouse, and the addict.

Just like an alcoholic can never drink again, a PMOer can never PMO again. That simple.

 

I know you know the answer to this already.

I'm so sorry he is putting you through this.

 

Case closed. I might add "all media".

 

My gut is: Overconfidence. I've seen this in many guys. Once they get a little bit of freedom, they thing, "Oh, I can handle it." That and "But I SHOULD be able to (have this toy)," basically.

On your initial question: "Instagram, good or terrible?"
IDK if I'd call it terrible for everyone, but for addicts, I believe it can be a trigger (and is for many guys--facebook too, among others). I'm not out there yet, but I've been toying with the idea. But in my research, it seems overwhelmingly visual.

What happens in porn addicts is the visual part of their brain is too overactive, and almost demands arousal. In fact, I've heard porn described as an arousal addiction.

So we tell guys, "If you really want to kick this, you have to starve your eyes."

Hope that helps,
L

 

consider yourself validated

also, I think everyone agrees that PA is harder to kick than alcohol. I have friend that went through both PA and NA, and he says the PA is way harder. fwiw

 

@Trigirl78 I know you already know this, but I'm going to put it out there again just for the heck of it.

The journey out if this addiction is a mess. A big circular chaotic mess. Nothing is linear. Our PA brain is so f'd up we do really stupid things. Sometimes we even see it like in the third person and still just can't stop it.

I'm not making excuses. I just want you to know that setbacks and cycles and wackiness are the norm. Your man does love you. He can emerge- and I hope he does.

I'm sorry for what you're going through. It sucks. It sucks that PAs have suck a damn hard time being honest.