it’s been over a month since i have not masturbated and can’t get hard!?:(

Could be a flat line issue, which passes.

 

Take it easy, friend. My main advice is just to relax and stop worrying so much about it.

There's nothing wrong with you. Everyone has a different journey in their own recovery, but things will get better with time.

Worrying about it isn't going to make it any better, so just focus on something else for a while. Don't keep checking whether or not you can get an erection. Focus on other aspects of your life. If you're under the age of 65 and you don't have other health conditions that might interfere with erections, they will come back eventually. Just let them come back naturally, and stop worrying so much.

I've seen a lot of anxious posts like this one from you, friend. Have you considered doing some stress-relieving activities like running or meditation? It might help you sort things out.

 

If you're 20, I'm confident that this will pass with enough time. Stay committed to your goals and just focus on other aspects of your life.

 

Sounds like flatline to me. Now here's an experiment to try - it worked for me when I experienced flatline. I was like maybe 6 days in and doing a good job staying away from porn and then the flatline hit and it scared the shit out of me because I felt like my dick was dead. I read some info from others who actually suggested masturbation as a "jump start" to my libido. That worked for me. I found that as long as I only masturbate like once every 2-3 days at most, and stay away from porn I'm fine in bed with my wife.

So if you're really worried about it, try masturbating once or twice over the next week and see if it helps or not. A tip though - if you do masturbate, only masturbate to your thoughts, do not watch porn at all, or think about porn. Just run a real-life scenario through your mind with a girl you know and are attracted to to try to re-associate intimate relations with a woman versus watching other people have sex on screen.

 

hello, i have created this account just to reply to your thread and let you understand few points.

i have personally tried nofap and i have went for months without it with no problem, but if i want to trigger and get hard it will not be instant it will take time, and i never worry about it, but here are few things i would like you to know.

first, you have to know that relationships are not about getting a hard-on, a true women will not care whether you get a hard on or she will be turned on or off, it has nothing to do with it.

it starts with yourself whether you see it as negative aspect and a lack of confidence from your side then it will effect your behavior its just psychology

i did indeed saw myself starting relationships when im 3 months into nofap everytime, i don't know why but it just seem to come, i have had the best relationship after 3 months of NoFap" i did not even know what nofap was at that time" and i still got hard on easily because there was so much attraction going on, so you should not worry about that, the girl should worry herself that she wasn't seducing you enough and not put the blame on yourself.

so lastly i hope my advice helps, but i want you to know relationships are not about "fu**ing a women" it's and if you wanna do that its called " making love to a women", you should be able to stand out from crowd and see what u truly want, for me personally i want love over sex.

 

tme. The goal is to completely stop porn mastorbation for good

 

Keep going.

 

You can't make the temptation go away. It will always be there. If we could just make the temptation go away, this forum wouldn't exist. Since you can't avoid temptations, urges, or moments of weakness, my advice is to have a game plan for when they inevitably come up.

Make a list of activities that are healthy (walking, meditating, cooking for yourself, calling a friend, exercising, practicing music / art, whatever you want). Make a commitment to do one of those things whenever you start feeling urges. Now, you have a backup plan. You won't go back to porn because you will be doing one of these healthy activities instead.

Then, work on identifying your urges. What do they really feel like? When do they come up? How frequently do they come up? Do they come up when you do a specific activity? Answer these questions honestly with yourself and then just listen to your body and mind. The urges will come up again, but they won't be confusing because you'll know exactly what they are and you won't fall into unhealthy behavior because you have a backup plan.

That's a good place to start. Once you get through another 30 days of sobriety with that alone, come back and we can all talk about what to do next.

 

hi, can you share with me what benefits u got on 1 year NoFap? it seems really interesting

 

The main benefit is peace of mind. I no longer feel ashamed of who I am. I no longer feel disgusted with myself. It's like a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. It's really hard to describe all the benefits because every day I've spent clean from porn has been a gift.