Sense of loss?

Yup. And that is your brain fucking with you. I'm 70 or so days porn and masturbation free and it does not get easier. I am thinking about porn and fantasizing about women all the live long day. I hate it. The first 60 days or so were great. Recently, it's been tougher, so I figure it just goes in cycles. Your addiction will always try to fool you. Don't let it.

 

You just need to have the want to quit greater than the want to live. You need to swear to yourself you will never peek, or pmo again, and stick to that plan no matter what. You need to remember that it is a lifestyle and not a challenge. Porn offers you nothing except a lifetime of misery. It is all an illusion. Remember how shit and pointless it is when you relapse. Thats right, its all an illusion. Rejoice in the fact porn is never gonna be in your life again.

 

Yes it's called grief! Every time you make a change in your life (even a positive change), you'll naturally fall into a cycle of grieving for what you've lost. In this case you're grieving for something that brought you intense pleasure, it's natural that letting go will be hard.

As for how to combat it, I'm still pretty early in my journey so don't have all the answers. I'm trying to hold on to all of the positive things that will come from making this change (more time for productive pursuits, more fulfilment in my relationship...) and let those keep me on the right path. Also finding this community really useful, it allows me to get stuff off my chest which I have struggled to do in the past.

If you can get through this you will emerge a stronger, happier, healthier man. Surely that's got to be worth fighting for?!