Something more important than a streak.

Exactly. What I like to say to people is this: Having a goal is a good starting point, but don't let that milestone become an endpoint. It worries me when people say their goal is "X" because that leaves the question, "well, what comes after that? do you just start over?" And that is exactly the importance of having a clear mindset rather than focusing on an ephemeral goal. It's the mindset which yields more permanent results like changes in personality and motivation.

Thanks for sharing!

 

Painistemporary... you are so right, I have failed in my goals of getting a streak so far and I still have had benefits. Not MO'ing is what got me on this last relapse, well that and I had a wet dream that didn't finish and left me in a bad spot this morning.
But you are right, it's the journey that matters.

 

Thank you painitstemporary. That is a fantastic perspective to consider.

 

Yes, streak length is not the all-defining thing. You can get a lot more out of this than a number to brag with.

There are reasons they are not addicted. At least I feel like being addicted is the default in our society.
They might not be, because they already have the right mindset and are too busy to do it, or because they do not have much sex drive/sexual energy because of a health issue.

It's certainly not easy, but how would you know it is unachievable? Much depends on definition. For example I wouldn't call perfection not ever being tempted, but always handling temptation right.
Trying to be perfect certainly is going to make for living closer to one's ideals, even if it doesn't always work. So just saying "this doesn't work anyways" is the lazy way out in my opinion.

I doubt anyone able to do this over 200 days can be considered a failure, if anyone can. Because you don't get there without making improvements in your life.

That's cool.
My aim is to get rid of MO and experience the nofap benefits. I don't care about P.

 

My bad! I even double checked myself to make sure I had spelled your name right...I blame my lack of sleep. Haha, goodnight!

 

Great discussion. Stopping PMO and developing myself are now my goals. I originally tried stopping and found it very difficult. Since I focused on developing a better me, I have found the urges more manageable and my motivation seems deeper. Also, having a better mindset helps me reframe triggers and allows me to seek new and more beneficial behaviours.

Wishing you all well.

 

better to be an idiot without pornaddiction as to be an idiot with pornaddiction.

pornaddiction destroys the contact with your environment. this is one of the main problems.

i dont believe in this whole tale with superpowers - but you get clear in the brain when you stop watching porn.

setting goals (or better counting days) and reaching them is the most important factor in this challenge. during this fight we need something to hold - and this is our counter.

 

I must say that P is the monster to me. P is what I want removing from my life. As a society we seem to have walked into a perverse, obscene and deviant sexual expression through P. MO may not be as much as a problem. However, I choose to improve actual and real sexual relation with a partner and abstaining from MO is fine with me.

I would prefer to use 'ideal' than 'perfect'. We are humans. We are flawed. We are not perfect. I see many people, especially those with mental health problems, where the concept on perfection has and is causing them much distress.

I am sure that the universe is unfolding as it should and I trust that whatever goals we all have will be achieved with the right knowledge and determination.

 

Nice reading your post painistemporary.

Im new to this community and like any other fapstronaut P is what destroyed my sexuality. It constantly trains us with new expectations that our mind expects the same in real life.

I dont know about MO whether i can hold it or not! But P must surely be avoided at all costs throughout our journey in life. It aint easy but very possible.

 

What makes me a freak monster? Watching two humans, who want to be watched, have sexual interactions? I don't think so.

I am convinced the benefits like more energy, creativity, and probably also confidence come from not wasting our energy, a good deal of which is stored in the sperm.

You can't look at the past and try to be perfect. It is only possible in the present. But yes, the perfect me wouldn't be watching porn, except for educational purposes.

Nicely said.

 

i think watching 10 men having hard sexual interaction with one girl makes us to a freak monster. is that normal? we all know the depths of porn. the stuff gets harder and harder. only a few people are acting like this in real sexual life.

in my opinion there is a border between "normal" sexual behaviour and perversion.

for sure porn leads to sexual-perversion. it destroys limits.

 

Some info on the topic.

Effects of porn: objectification of women, dopamine rush, distorted view of sexuality, choosing illusion over reality, thinking that perversions and abberations are normal, making too high expectations about the looks of women and their performance in bed, erectile dysfunction

Effects of masturbation: fatigue, depression, desensitization of the penis, delayed ejaculation, feeling dizzy, down, or light headed, possibly erectile dysfunction as well

I'm sure there are other effects, pick your poison.

 

You know, although I never made it to 90 days, I am not interested in the way crazy things anymore.
If it takes 10 guys to handle one girl, something is wrong with those guys. I'd rather watch one cool guy, not that there are many in porn, and see the dynamics between two people.

Porn and MO does. We experienced that. Porn alone, we don't know. I don't think so.

But yes, I still don't think P is a good idea. So it is moot.

 

I feel much of the confusion about whether P alone or PMO is the problem comes from people trying to be politically correct and avoiding to use the proper terms.

http://www.artofmanliness.com/2014/10/09/how-to-quit-porn/
In this article, for example, the author avoids using the word masturbation. He mostly uses the expression "using porn" by which he probably means PMO. People might read this and think only porn is the problem and MO is fine. I'm sure that is not the idea the author is trying to convey. He is merely choosing political correctness over making sure he is not misunderstood.

Even here we feel we have to hide words behind single letter abbreviations. Although it means the same to everyone who knows and confuses the newbies.

 

It's different for all of us. For me, it is MO. I would not have any use for P without MO, but I could definitely MO without P, and did for years. It didn't make the images in my mind any more realistic. I can link the time in my life I started to MO to the time in life things started to go wrong. Levels of achool work deteriorated, tiredness levels rose. My I nterest in actual relationships didn't happen because I was happy pleasing myself. Yes, P didn't help, but I have been the same with or without P.

You might be here to get rid of P, but some of us are here to stop MO. And what is P without MO, anyway? What other purpose does it have? None.

Our aims are all similar, it seems, but they're not all the same.